Breakfast Topic: Noob Encounters
by David Nelson 
Sep 7th 2006 at 8:00AM
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Last night, as I was hanging out in the Iron Forge auction house, minding my own business and chatting with some buds, I got an odd tell. Some level 12 was trying to get me to open up a portal to Darnassus for him. Now, if I were a mage, this might have made a little bit of sense. Being warlock, well...I informed him that he should probably find a mage. Unhappy with my answer, he responded that I was being lazy and I should open up the portal, as he knows warlocks can move people from here to there and I shouldn't lie to him. Against my better judgement I tried to explain how summoning works, going so far as to suggest bothering a warlock in Darnassus. He replied with a few choice obscenities, put me on ignore and left the auction house. I can only assume he was heading off to find a Warrior to conjure him some water for his long trip to Darnassus.
This is not my first close encounter of the noob kind, but it was certainly the rudest. Most of the time I try to help, but some people just seem to be beyond any assistance you might provide. What's your most interesting noob encounter in Azeroth?
Filed under: Breakfast Topics
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
Kinless Sep 7th 2006 8:16AM
You should have gone someplace like the outskirts of Razorfen Downs and summoned him there. Or Winterspring. Or Moonglade even. Goodluck to him getting home.
Drew Sep 7th 2006 8:50AM
I was buying a mount for my mage when I saw a very excited pally galloping away from the horse breeder. I whispered him saying, "you do know palladins get a free mount at 40, right?" Sadly, he did not ... I hope he opened a GM ticket and got a friendly gm :(
Magnarussa Sep 7th 2006 9:11AM
I was sitting outside the bank in Org on my mount when a lvl 12 shaman asked me how I got my pet since I'm a shaman. I said "what pet?" and he replied, "The one your sitting on." I informed him that it wasn't a pet, but a mount that provides me with quick transportation. I then informed him of the requirements of getting one. Still makes me
chuckle when I think about it :D
Lance Sep 7th 2006 9:40AM
Wow! What a wonderful topic for today, given what happened just last night.
I was on my guild bank toon last night when I caught this conversation happening near the Stormy bank between an Warrior(11) and a random 60:
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War(/s): "SOMEONE NEEDS TO LEVEL ME TO 20!!!!! IM 11!!"
60(/s): "Typing in CAPS doesn't actually increase your vocal range."
60(/s): "However, it greatly increases your chances of being placed on ignore."
War(/s): "WHATEVER!!!"
Me(/w): "How much coin are you willing to pay for the PL?"
War(/s): "WHAT????"
War(/s): "LOOK IM BROKE!!"
Me(/w): "Well, your odds of getting PL'd for free (11-20) are slim at best. I recommend you grabbing two others around level 8-9 and just go slaying. That way you'll get group xp bonus, plus you'll get most of the xp for the kills, and kills should roll in quick."
War(/w): "YOUR TO LOW TO LEVEL ME ANYWAY!!"
War(/w): "NOOB!!"
War(/w): "FOOL!!"
Me(/w): "I'm a guild bank, jackass. I live at the AH/MB, yea I am too low. I was thinking of helping you on my 41 until my friend came on."
War(/w): "WHATEVER NOOB!!!!!!"
War: /ignore me
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Sorry, but that whole incident (and there was actually more with my girlfriend after she got his name from my chat log) was absolutely ridiculous. That frustrating kind of ridiculous, you know. Damned newbs. ;Þ
Vushia Sep 7th 2006 7:35PM
For me, the big noob encounter (which happens A LOT) is some level 10 asking for directions from Darnassus to Stormwind. After giving them the directions (which we all know are long, complicated and dangerous) being asked to escort them.
Second biggest would be someone asking about a piece of gear I have and offering me money for it. 99% of the time the item is soulbound, and after being told this they offer more money for it....
Sideshow Sep 7th 2006 9:44AM
You know, no offense meant by this, but I find that I get a lot more n00bish behavior on the Alliance side on my server. No, granted, I do get some noobs on the Horde side, but they just seem to be everywhere on the Ally side. Is this just my server?
Trudie Sep 7th 2006 10:11AM
Isn't it awful when you see a high-level character wearing terrible gear for their class?
There's a warlock in my Molten Core raid who, just until last week, was using a Skullforge Reaver (you know, the purple, glowy melee sword that drops from the Baron) as his main-hand weapon. His excuse, "I've never found anything better." My argument was that a really super-cheap green dagger or sword with +stamina from the AH would be better for a warlock than the stupid Skullforge with a crappy proc, but week after week, he showed up to MC with that same sword. It infuriated me every time I grouped with him. He finally got a Sorcerous Dagger last week, so maybe I'll calm down a bit.
I've seen rogues wearing druid gear. I've seen a priest with a Warden Staff with an Unholy weapon enchant on it. I remember when I was a level 11 noob warrior, I rolled on a cape with +intellect, but at that point, I didn't know any better. By the time you're level 60 it seems like you'd figure some of that stuff out.
Brasti Sep 7th 2006 10:16AM
I was also on my level 1 mule I use for auction house purposes only and had an interesting conversation with a random lvl 12 warrior in Stormwind.
[lvl 12 war] - Put your bracers in the do not trade slot.
[me] - I'm an AH mule and my bracers are gray. If you are looking to level your enchanting, you can redo the enchant on your own bracers.
[lvl 12 war] - huh?
[me]
[lvl 12 war] - Go grow some levels noob!
[me] - Thanks for the tip, I'll work on that
[lvl 12 war] - I've got 2 epiced level 60's
[me] - I'm sure you do
[lvl 12 war] - learn to play noob, I’m running MC, BWL….
[me] - /ignore
I’m really not even sure where all that came from. He was trying to level his enchanting I presume and help out a lower level character. I tried to tell him I didn’t need it and how he could continue to level enchanting without having to find a new person each time.
Anthony Sep 7th 2006 10:21AM
In these type of encounters: "Can you run me through WC?", "Can I have 20g?" etc. I usually ask plainly "What's in it for me?" Surprisingly, some actually grasp what I'm getting at here...
Dr. Woo Sep 7th 2006 10:55AM
Had a lv 60 Priest not in our guild start talking smack in Vent during our ZG raid. He insisted that a guildie's strategy for Arlokk would not work. When the guildie asked him if he even knew the details of his strategy, he replied by saying, "I know what I'm talking about, man, I have Tier 3 characters, I've been to Naxx and beyond..."
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Naxx and beyond? Er...
Unfortunately, this diatribe continued for what seemed like hours and the raid obviously dissolved at that point.
As a Warlock, I enjoy telling demanding noobs that I'm not specced for summoning.
If my Priest buddy was here, he could tell you a million stories...as we all know, the Priest class is probably the most stressed class in the game (if not equal to a Warrior), what with all the demands for heals, rezzes, buffs, etc. My friend had taken a verbal beating for a while involving raid members demanding Priestly services, and when we took out a Surger add in MC, he was killed in the fight, along with many others. This classic line of WoW is now forever ingrained in my memory:
"Guys, I'm trying to rez, I'm clicking the button, but it keeps telling me 'You are dead.' "
RufusMccooter Sep 7th 2006 11:09AM
I was leveling a low-level alt (a night-elf priest) in Teldrassil. I must have been about 6th level or something, just beginning to learn the priesty goodness. All the sudden, I get this tell: "Heal me!" It was from a rogue who was grinding in a nearby area. We weren't grouped, and although I realize a priest is suppose to heal, a little courtesy is nice, ESPECIALLY when you're not grouped with a person. So I told him, "Ask nice". Later, he apologized and I did heal him...Of course I've no idea if he was a real "noob" or not, but his rudeness was a pretty good indicator...
R.O.B. Sep 7th 2006 11:16AM
I actually felt sorry for this guy; we were all newbs at some point. So, anyway:
I remember playing Alliance on some PvE server that I joined because my GF was playing on it. I had joined a guild and had taken a newbie hunter under my wing. He had been trying and trying to get some special turtle as a pet; It was really straining on him. Eventually I heard tell that he had finally gotten it. Our conversation went something like this:
Me: Hey, I heard you finally got that turtle you were chasing after.
Him: Yeah, and finally I can ride around on top of it like all the higher-levels do with their pets!
Me: ...
So, I explained to him the process of getting a mount and the difference between mounts and pets. He was so disheartened that he logged off and never logged back on on that character, and as far as I know quit WoW forever.
By the way, I've noticed that people almost always pick Alliance when they first start playing.
Gary Sep 8th 2006 3:17PM
My definition in WoW is different than in other MMORPGs for some reason. A WoW noob is the incredibly rude teenager (I know - generalization there. But if these folks are over 20, then their mommy should kick them out of the basement so thay can learn some friggin' people skills) that expects you to help them out for no gain to yourself. Notice I say "expects" your help - the "port me to Darnassus warlock" or the "power level me to 20 now" posts from above. I've gotten a few requests from time to time, and usually when I'm in the middle of something else LOL. I'll tell them nicely that "I'm sorry - I'm doing something right now" and I get one of two responses - either "thanks for your time " or "I don't care - do it now noob or I'll report you for something I make up" - which one do you I'm more likely to contact later with an "sorry for not helping earlier... I'm done now. Did you find the help you were looking for?" message? :-)
And on a side note... why do they ALWAYS feel the need to call you a noob when they don't get their way? LOL The two chat logs above had that in there, and it always seems to happen to me too... just makes me laugh.
Ian O'Rourke Sep 7th 2006 11:49AM
So, I was a level 26 Hunter (IRC) and I'd teamed up with a few other people to do some quests. Great. Two of them I knew, the other two I didn't. One of the unknown two was a level 32 Hunter, and she kept going to melee ALL the time. She never use a bow, and she never used her pet.
Okay I thought, it is a mob dense area, and she is a bit higher than us...let her got on with it.
When we'd finished I did ask her what her pet was...she didn't have one.
A level 31 Hunter without a Pet. It sort of cemented by Alliance side experience, which seemed to be a whole lot more juvenile and stuff than my Horde experience.
Brdley Sep 7th 2006 12:33PM
I expect people in the starting areas to be n00bs most of the time, but this still made me smile.
I was flying from Stormwind to Redridge on one of my lowbies. As I flew over Northshire, I got a whisper from a level 8 warrior: "whoa, where did you get that bird?!".
I explained to him that anyone can ride one, just walk over to westfall.
Blacksabre Sep 7th 2006 12:54PM
I think it's sad to see guys taking advantage of this to simply do another slam job on thr Alliance.
Since there's like 3-4 times as many people playing Alliance as there are Horde, of course more people on the Alliance side are going to act inappropriately.
Why don't we, instead, discuss the constant Horde ganking, which is almost never seen from the Alliance?
What, you say, the Horde doesn't gank?
:helpless laughter:
Yeah...right.
Doug Sep 7th 2006 12:54PM
I happen to be a noob, and I find the posts here hilarious. They show just how stupid some people are in real life. I've asked my share of noob questions the most memorable being:
"When do I get a mount because running back and forth between org and xr is getting old?"
A lvl 60 was nice enough to (after having a good laugh at my expense) explain that I was able to fly (via flight path) for a small fee, and save alot of time.
WOW did I feel dumb...
I have since adpoted the philosophy that I should ask about things that I don't understand in game, because people will generally help a noob out.
Michael Sep 7th 2006 1:00PM
All of these comments make me both wince and feel better.... strange I know... but I was starting to think my Alliance mage, Endante, and Hord Hunter, Kicksthebull,were some how n00b magnets.
The one behavior tha really gets under my hoof is the low lvl begging cash... and you know they do it so often and for so long, that you know they are like the guy on your local street corner with a cardboard sign..
they have almost taken to a pro lvl. it is annoying and the more that do it, the more new players see it and start to emulate it as a natural part of leveling their character. As far as I am concerned a n00b is not always a newbie... there is a big difference. I will bend over backward to help a newbie trying to understand the game and mechanics... but a n00b well teleporting to razorfen (as suggested by an earlier poster) would be VERy well deserved.
Chris Sep 7th 2006 1:00PM
A guildie and I (Druid & Hunter) were running around in Arathi Highlands a few months ago. (Horde side) We ended up grouping with a Warlock and a Warrior (the Warrior being named after some character in Final Fantasy VII). (Keep in mind that Arathi Highlands is a mid-30s level area.) So, we're griding for quests and xp and the Warrior is running around with a 2h weapon and holding virtually no aggro. So, my buddy asks him, "Do you have a shield you can equip?" The Warrior responds something like, why do I need a shield when I'm tearing it up with this sword? My buddy tells him that he could hold aggro better by using a sword & board. The next line is infused in my brain for all time, and I quote:
"What is aggro?"
I nearly fell outta my chair. We're talking about a level 30+ Warrior who doesn't know what the term aggro means. My buddy proceeded to spend the next 15 minutes explaining aggro and how one acquires and uses it. Of course, this has inspired such tongue-in-cheek lines among several of our buddies as: what's a buff? what do you mean you're going to hearth, I don't understand? etc.
I noted a month or two down the line I ran across this intrepid warrior outside the Orgrimmar AH wearing virtually the entire Champions set and, yes, still carrying a monster 2H sword (I think with a Crusader enchant). Shook my head and moved on.
Got an update last week that my same guildie had run across our friendly Warrior actually equipped with a sword and board as he was headed off to one of the Raid instances. We can't stay noobs forever, now can we?
Anthony Sep 7th 2006 1:29PM
One small point. Being a noob (lack of knowledge about the game) does not equal being a jackass (lack of respect for others).
Too often we use the term interchangable, which is simply not true. All of us were noobs, but not all of us were jackasses.