"AFK neighbor just bit my dog"
by Mike Schramm 
Mar 19th 2007 at 3:17PM
There's a running joke in my guild that whenever anyone has to leave an instance for a little while, everyone says "AFK to wash face." Apparently someone actually used that AFK excuse at one point, and it's been funny ever since. Most of the AFK's I've seen have been pretty tame, although I have had a few people leave instance runs fast because their kids have demolished their house in some way ("chocolate syrup all over kitchen floor, afk a sec"), and once because "afk 2 mins, cops at door." We didn't hear from that guy for the rest of the night.But there's lots of better AFK excuses than even that.
"g2g guys, there's smoke coming out of my computer.."
"afk my brother has a knife"
"Guys I have to go there's a car that crashed into my house"
"guys i got to go, dog just died"
" I have to go AFK for a bit guys, my son just told me he's gay."
"brb internet just went out"
"afk wife giving birth"
Ok, so those last two are excuses given, not received. But I've never heard anything this crazy-- I must be grouping with the wrong people. Or maybe the right ones...
What's the craziest AFK excuse you've actually heard in game? And (because most of these are probably fake anyway) what's the craziest one you've ever given to get out of a bad PUG?
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 5)
Tony V Mar 19th 2007 4:08PM
I actually had to say “the hotel is on fire, got to go” when a fire alarm when off once in the middle of a BWL raid. False alarm, of course.
Pingmeister Mar 19th 2007 6:05PM
I believe he was joking, but my favorite was a Guildie who said: "AFK, wife wants to discuss divorce"
bobpwnsjones Mar 19th 2007 6:06PM
afk for a sec, i'm reheating some KFC...
oh god
MastaSnipa Mar 19th 2007 5:47PM
My favourite one i use to figure out if the people are stupid or not!
"Afk, My power just went out!"
AtomB Mar 19th 2007 4:27PM
just recently i was running SM and 1 person said afk about 10 minutes, gotta take a shower. i was like you gotta be kidding me
Hank Mar 19th 2007 3:37PM
I am always going AFK to take care of my son. One day when I was home with him, he got sick. I was in a guild BRD run, and put in 'AFK kid puking'
As great as my guild is, they were still waiting for me 15 minutes later, after I changed his clothes and cleaned the floor.
bobpwnsjones Mar 19th 2007 6:07PM
afk for a minute, reheating some KFC
oh god
I am Mar 19th 2007 8:58PM
my computer really was smoking!
Krystian J Mar 19th 2007 4:56PM
A person I was running SM with put "AFK power just went out!!!11"
lol.
MacAllah Mar 19th 2007 3:45PM
One time I had to throw up a "BRB, just burned self with hot candle wax."
Don't ask.
Crono Mar 19th 2007 3:47PM
^^^
bow chicka bow WoW
Obmulap Mar 19th 2007 3:48PM
Our most common seems to be "AFK bio"
and the ever popular most can relate to: "gtg wife woke up"
my personal favorite is when someone says "AFK need a drink" as their character is doing so on screen.
Braddock Mar 19th 2007 4:44PM
Our group has a running thing with the phrase...
AFK Soda... we treat it almost like a softdrink commercial...
Get your AFK Soda at your local neighborhood convenience store... and this has also spawned AFK Candy Bars, and other AFK branded products in the process... it can be quite enjoyable... and I wonder if someone will actually take this idea and run with it.. if so I know one person that they will need to pay some royalties to if that ever happens... :)
Shiro Mar 19th 2007 3:59PM
Mine usually revolve around my birds. Normal AFK excuses include:
"Sec, Parrot on keyboard." "AFK, putting birds to bed" "AFK, parrot flew into kitchen." "AFK, parrot potty emergency"
If that's not bad enough, try telling your guild on Vent that the screaming in the background isn't the rainforest. :P
Hybrys Mar 19th 2007 3:53PM
>.> My guildies have actually has cars run into their front yard, and one just had his dog die.
"AFK, sirens and knocki.... Why is there a car in my yard?!?"
Bill Mar 19th 2007 6:28PM
We get lots of "afk 10 min, gotta walk the dog". I am a culprit of this too but when your greyhound wants a walk...there is no denying him.
To get out of pugs, the best thing to do I've found is to just completely stop moving, talking, etc...and exit wow. Log on to an alt for 20 minutes or so. Log back in to main. Its the old "WOOOPS damn blizzard DC'd me" excuse..
Matt Rossi Mar 19th 2007 6:13PM
My old guild had a joke based on a BRD run: one of the guys got into a pug and supposedly, the tank typed "AFK BJ" just before the seven ghost dwarves. He didn't come back.
Prauche Mar 19th 2007 3:54PM
I actually had a GUILDIE ask the rest of our GUILD group to let him go AFK "for about 10 minutes" after a DM wipe so he could "go beat my friend at ping pong." On vent no less. After the stunned silence, and all the /w going back and forth with the rest of the group members, the group leader -- I don't know how -- very calmly and nicely suggested he go do that and we'd fill his spot with someone else. It has been a joke for those of us present ever since.
Zandura Mar 19th 2007 3:57PM
AFK Tornado
SEAN Mar 19th 2007 4:00PM
**DING** "BRB, gota go learn new talents."
O_o .... o_O .... t(-.-t)