LOL gay!
by Elizabeth Wachowski 
May 28th 2007 at 12:45PM
Everyone's got their chat-related pet peeve in WoW. Amanda hates the term "wife aggro." There's a lot of antipathy to the term "noob." A shaman in my guild harbors a vicious hatred towards anyone who uses an "abbreviation" that is longer than the actual word in question. There are even people who hate LFG and WTB, although I'm unsure how they ever made it to 70 without their heads exploding.
I have my own major pet peeve. Arguing about it nearly got me gkicked a few months back, and even today a particular officer will rag on my "oversensitivity." I speak, of course, of the recent trend towards calling everything you don't like "gay."
I HATE THIS TREND. My respect for people who say "That's a gay item", "That quest is so gay" and "XXX is gay, don't group with him" is so low as to be nonexistent. No matter how old you are, calling stuff gay makes you sound immature and ignorant. To me, you will forever be 15 years old and snickering about "buttsecks" at your lunch table. Yes, you may claim that the word doesn't mean "homosexual" in that context, but if I started calling everything I didn't like "black" and said that it had absolutely nothing to do with race, how much support do you think I'd get outside of the robe-and-white-hood community?
It's the same with people who talk in trade chat about getting "jewed down." I'm Jewish, and although I've never stolen mats in my life, if you hand me the mats for a Primal Might and then start throwing around "Jew" when dealing with the price, you're not getting those mats back without an apology in the trade channel and a /dance of forgiveness.
I tried to argue this issue with my guild, but got shot down fairly quickly. When the second-in-command of the guild asks "So are you calling me ignorant?", "Yes, or overcompensating for something" does not seem to be the correct answer. What do you think about these words? How do you handle these issues in your guild?
EDITED TO ADD: This discussion has taken off in all sorts of ways. I've chosen not to delete any comments, but I ask that everyone please remember to be at least kind of respectful to others.
Filed under: Analysis / Opinion, Virtual selves, Guilds, Odds and ends
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 9)
KnightJade May 28th 2007 12:53PM
I have to say i totally agree with your comments i hate it when peaple call things gay it dosent even make sense.
FadedReality May 28th 2007 12:56PM
The word gay means two things. Happy, and a homosexual person. Nothing else. If you get /gkicked over it maybe its time to find a guild with more mature officers. It's not even really a pet peeve like the others as much as its downright offensive to the gay community. Using "gay" to identify something as something you don't like not only outs you as a homophobe but shows that your vocabulary and sensitivity toward others in general are less than stellar.
I've kicked people from groups for using it in the middle of Black Morass. I don't stand for prejudice of any kind and I don't give a shit that "no i don't mean it like gay like homos lawl" watch your mouth.
Also Elizabeth, you should overcharge on principle alone for the Jew remarks :d
dlanni May 28th 2007 1:00PM
I agree with you on all points. That kind of language is immature and homophobic. It seems to me that certain kinds of language seem to be indicative of a player that isn't a lot of fun to be around or group with. If I hear someone says 'that's so gay' I just won't group with them.
I was in a guild that was amazingly obnoxious on vent. They wouldn't stop calling each other gay, or some item was gay... well pretty much what you said. I talked to the guild leader, he didn't have a problem with all the homophobia, so I left. It's been about two years, and I have to be honest, I haven't run into that problem within a guild since.
BaboonNL May 28th 2007 1:01PM
This post is black.
Tiago May 28th 2007 1:11PM
Honestly, I don't give a rats ass.
It's a stupid use of the word, but can you honestly say that it is used with the intent to offend homosexuals?
Sometimes it might be, ok, but i bet 99% of the times "gay" is used in wow, there is no insult behind it.
And if you're gonna say "How would you like it if I started calling all the pigs in the game Portuguese?" (Which I am)
Again, I wouldn't give a rats ass. Sticks and stones and all that. People just love being too sensitive nowadays.
Hope nobody pops a vein reading this...
NeoWolf May 28th 2007 1:12PM
Suffice it to say, I couldn't agree more.
Paul May 28th 2007 1:11PM
When someone on my server calls something gay, I always ask, "Wait, how is that homosexual?" half the time they don't realize I'm pointing out that their bigotry, and they explain to me they don't mean that the thing in question is ACTUALLY gay. sigh.
As the other posters said, it doesn't matter if they just say gay to mean stupid, I know that. If these people actually had any gay friends and saw what gay people go through on a daily basis, they wouldn't be saying anything was gay.
Derek May 28th 2007 1:12PM
This post is so black...
bargle May 28th 2007 2:47PM
I agree. However. I think the one thing that stops me from opening my word hole, if some one were to come out in my guild. I don't think there would be an issue with the people that it matters with. The guild leaders. And I have left a guild, where this was a factor of why I left. I think you have to make the choice for your self. If you feel un-comfterable. Why are you there? If it makes you uncomfortable that ppl outside your guild, you have tools.
Shizlak May 28th 2007 1:16PM
Stop being a little child and trying to impose your views on other people. People are trying to relax and have a good time with their friends and are not interested in bleeding heart crybabies that take everything personally. Relax. We have to put up with you enough in the real world.
David May 28th 2007 1:16PM
isn't being bigoted against bigots the type of bigotry that you are against? You cannot say you are against bigotry since that is a bigoted comment (i.e. intolerant of opinions, lifestyle or identity).
Everyone is bigoted against some type of opinion, lifestyle or identity.
IHateGays May 28th 2007 1:24PM
This post is so GAY! Just like it's writer.
Tridus May 28th 2007 1:20PM
I do the same thing Paul. Pointing it out that way seems to discourage it more effectively then ranting and raving does. I guess people don't like to look foolish.
A lot of it just comes down to the immaturity of the community, and how the mature part seems to dislike standing up to the immature part. The immature part is also where most of the homophobes (and there are a LOT of those) are, so they tend to get a free pass. Mature folks only seem to really stand up to the immature folks when they're trying to have a mature guild, in which case the /gremove's come fast and furious.
Krick May 28th 2007 1:22PM
I started a guild and one of the rules from day one was no hate language in chat (which includes "gay", "fag", and all variations thereof). You get warned a few times, then kicked from the guild if it doesn't stop. I'm a lot more aggressive about language in guild chat since everyone in the guild has to see it but I've warned people even when they've said something to me in a private tell that I wouldn't want to see in chat.
ramanan May 28th 2007 1:26PM
I find it hard to take people seriously who use gay to describe everything that sucks. Same with people calling stuff retarded. Just because you used to talk like that when you were 12, doesn't mean you have to keep talking like that now.
Juicydrapsag May 28th 2007 1:26PM
i always try to remember that everyone is PLAYING A DAMN GAME and that I will probably NEVER see these people in real like thus i really dont give a shit. If I dint like a group or persons remarks /ignore and go about my business, in fat most of the time i dont even show the chat window unless I need to. Most people in this game are either over sensitive or over aggressive thus I just cut the crap and play.
Angelcorpse May 28th 2007 1:26PM
i always hated "n00b" certainly from higher lvls because everyone was a lower lvl at some point.
Pandemona May 28th 2007 1:28PM
I agree 100%. The term shows a general lack of maturity, as does anything racial used to describe something in a game or on the interweb. As a guild GM I'm often finding that members who make comments using slander end up being on the short-list of "near-future gkicks"
Any adult who acts like a 12 year old boy on recess in the school yard needs to move out of their parent's basement and join the ranks of the responsible.
Ben May 28th 2007 1:33PM
@9 Awsome post.
UncleVinny May 28th 2007 1:33PM
We had a huge guild war about this a year ago or so, and a group of about 10-15 people /gquit. I was on the side of the officers, who were pretty much dead-set against the term. I have plenty of gay friends, and it drives me up the wall when I hear it in-game. I don't actually quit parties when someone says it, but it makes me less likely to play with that person, and more likely to call him on his bullshit.