All the World's a Stage: Going to the Chapel

I'm back again for another week, guest-writing once again for David Bowers. Today's All the World's a Stage is themed in honor of Mr. Bowers, for whom today is a special day. Everyone at WoW Insider is wishing him the best and it's in the spirit of the festive and celebratory that we take a little bit of time to talk about the roleplay wedding.
Last week, we talked about some tips for setting up a roleplay event. These included a small series of steps that would help you formalize and execute an actual plan for such a gathering. Today, we're going to focus in on a specific kind of roleplay event -- the "roleplay wedding."
Roleplay weddings come and go in popularity. Just now, it's been a long while since I've heard of one happening on my server. But around this time last year, it seemed that I couldn't take a quiet stroll in Darnassus without tripping across a pair of Night Elves getting handfasted.
So, let's talk about that most sacred and beloved of roleplay subjects -- the wedding.
The first thing to consider when you're planning your roleplay wedding isn't the proposal. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that if you're considering how to put on a wedding, you've already found the boy or girl of your character's dreams.
Still, it's fair for the very first caveat to be "Know what you're up to." While this is not you, the player, getting married, you should still be aware that your characters are about to get joined at the hip. You probably want to make sure you're okay playing that level of emotion or intimacy with the other player.
Many roleplay weddings come at the end of a long, complicated storyline. It's a sort of "end" for the characters, an event that happens after the many trials and tribulations they've encountered. Other roleplay weddings can be the very beginning of a new story for characters, starting a whole new chapter in the characters' lives.
For whatever reason you may choose to have your characters tie the knot, many people enjoy the celebration of a roleplay wedding. It's a chance to get together with the community, and share some portions of your personal story.
Let's get to the nitty gritty, though, and talk about something you should consider when planning this sucker.
1. Invitations
This may sound a little implausible, but you should consider doing something a little special to invite your guests to your roleplay event. You can include not only a short, well-crafted paragraph in your in-game mail, but maybe a small present to make the mail a little more unique.
Maybe you want to a farm a particular gray drop item, like a roleplay hat. If you're feeling whimsical, you could even fish up a few fish. They mail just fine. Mailing gifts out to your guests will definitely imprint the event in their minds.
Some folks use real life email to communicate when not logged into the game. If you go that route, any number of graphic possibilities exist. Take some screen shots of important locations - they're great for conveying a sense of in-game history. You could even send some favorite music samples, to help communicate the general theme of your wedding.
2. Guest List
I mostly bring up "guest list" for a single important reason. You have to decide whether you're going to invite members of the opposite faction. Not to bring up the eternal "Are we at war?" argument, it's undeniable that the Horde and Alliance don't often get along.
If you plan on inviting members of the opposite faction, the location for your wedding might best be served being one of the "Sanctuary" cities. We'll talk about location in a moment, but it's important to know that whom you invite will definitely inform that location decision. Having your guests break out in PvP combat in the middle of your vows would not only be horrible and tragic for your characters, but you will also play hell trying to get the players back under control.
A large roleplay wedding can quickly become unmanageable. Any raid leader will tell you that getting 25 WoW players to move in synch is an exercise in herding cats. Be careful to make sure that you don't invite so many people that you sacrifice the fun of your personal roleplay in favor of putting on a show for the masses.
Ideally, you want to strike a balance so that there's enough people to truly feel like this is a big "event," but not so many that you lose any fun in the heat of keeping everything moving along.
3. Location
The old real estate adage for this situation is "location! location! location!" Hosting a roleplay wedding is no different.
Certainly, the personality and histories of your characters will play a very large part in deciding where you might hold a roleplay wedding. However, a few practical matters should come into play as well. Do you want to hold your wedding in a building? There are nice amphitheaters throughout the Nagrand zone. The striking forests of Teldrassil can be a gorgeous place to celebrate both your characters' love, and the beauty of nature.
You should be careful to find someplace relatively private. While I know a lot of people have had wedding success in even a busy city like Dalaran, many still prefer to avoid the random tells and interruptions you might get in public. It's not that you're trying to hide the event, exactly, as much as you're trying to make sure that it keeps moving smoothly.
And definitely choose your location purposefully. You want to be sure you have an answer if someone asks "Why are you holding your wedding in Booty Bay?"
4. Ceremony
Contrary to what some new roleplayers may think, you don't necessarily have to roleplay the entire ceremony. You could pre-write your entire ceremony, and simply copy and paste the summary into chat.
During your ceremony, you'll have dozens of people standing there, staring at your characters. If you don't summarize the vows, you want to make sure you have a good show for your guests. This is more a matter of showmanship than immersion. I'm a huge fan of escapist experiences, but I have to admit it can be a little easy to go stir-crazy if you're just watching the action.
One of my favorite roleplay weddings from another game (DAoC) created a web site for their event. When the time came to exchange vows, the "groom" simply posted the URL to the site. The guests could simply Alt+Tab to check out the entire outline.
Of course, there's something to be said for the emotional impact of the wedding procession. Everyone should be decked out in their finest clothing, and move through the crowd at a good, roleplay-walk pace. I think matching mounts for the entire bridal party looks especially snazzy, and that's fairly easy to do now in Wrath.
5. The Party
The party after your wedding can be as varied and unique as the wedding itself. If you're a gnome, you might put on a loud, raucous party. Dwarves and Trolls will both be certain to have vibrant, exciting spirits available for their guests to consume. It might be the humanist in me, but I can't help but think that both Nelfs and Belfs will probably put on an austere, reserved banquet to celebrate the nuptials.
Conclusion
This is, admittedly, simply the tip of the iceberg. The wedding industry is a vast business in the real world, and that's just for humans. Imagine adding a half-dozen other races into the mix!
Feel free to drop us some notes about your wedding experiences in game. I'd love to hear more about them, if you have can share those anecdotes.
Filed under: Analysis / Opinion, All the World's a Stage (Roleplaying)






Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
Guv Apr 19th 2009 11:09PM
well you could /ignore the mother in law and it would actually work.. damn sometimes ingame is so much better
furry Apr 19th 2009 11:18PM
One thing I'd suggest is in the invitations mention a special chat channel made for the event. All the ceremony text could be shared through that to avoid other chats going on. Because those could be voice-chat enabled you can even request everyone turn on in-game voice chat to take advantage of it so we don't need to wait for someone to type everything.
DeathPaladin Apr 19th 2009 11:21PM
I've never really gotten rp weddings. The idea just never clicked with me.
I suppose it helps that the characters I play tend to be crazy and/or sadistic. Since I don't really get the concept of rp weddings, playing such characters reduces the chance that I'd get invited to any. Most people don't want a cursed and soul-less husk of a person as their Best Man or Maid of Honor.
Which makes me wonder...What would an Ebon Blade wedding be like? Two Death Knights getting hitched would definitely be a surreal experience.
MechChef Apr 20th 2009 10:25AM
DK's don't get married. After having their hearts broken by the Lich King, they only engage in "friends with benefits" type relationships.
Eddy Apr 19th 2009 11:21PM
I heard about someone's in game commitment ceremony. I didn't know the players when they had it but I think they used a location that required flying mounts in Nagrand, maybe a floating island, and summoned everyone up there. Knowing the players involved, I think Tempest Keep or anywhere in Netherstorm might have been more appropriate, but I'm sure it was lovely.
Amritrao Apr 19th 2009 11:37PM
No way, man. Belfs party! Have you never been to Saltheril's Haven in Eversong? Booze, drunkards, and fireworks.
Zenboras Apr 19th 2009 11:55PM
Totally agree. I dont see how a BE wedding would be austere in any sense.
AltairAntares Apr 19th 2009 11:41PM
Sorry, I've never really gotten RP weddings, it just seems kinda, well, pathetic in comparison to the real thing.
Hoggersbud Apr 19th 2009 11:55PM
Funny, I think the real thing is more trouble than it's worth, leading to expenses, conflicts, and other fun stuff to the point where I don't get why people do them at all.
uncaringbear Apr 20th 2009 1:50AM
I guess RP weddings could be seen as pathetic by some. Just as pathetic as wearing digital armor and killing pretend dragons in a video game.
Fairlane Apr 19th 2009 11:58PM
"Handfasted"?
Yamara34 Apr 20th 2009 12:27AM
Handfasting is a pagan term (modernday anyway; I dunno about historical accuracy) for getting married
You tie the groom and bride's hands together
Yamara34 Apr 20th 2009 12:28AM
Wait actually, check Wikipedia, it IS an ancient custom
Fairlane Apr 20th 2009 12:48AM
Yamara34 said...
> Handfasting is a pagan term (modernday anyway; I
> dunno about historical accuracy) for getting married
>
> You tie the groom and bride's hands together
Yeah, I get that (wife knows about such things).
It just sounds incredibly filthy. :D
chewbakkaa Apr 20th 2009 1:12AM
I actually got married today in Moonglade, at the gazebo.
Matching mounts, black dress for milady and tuxedo/bloodsail set for me with roses in offhand.
Killed a few alliance on our way :)
Then had a big party in orgrimmar with feasts, booze, elune candles and a load of AoE
Finished the wedding in our room in the neutral inn in Dalaran.
Chewbakkaa + Tuskiedokie
vic Apr 20th 2009 1:32AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wj3RsNgeWKk
Priceless
Cadychan Apr 20th 2009 1:46AM
LOL, I was JUST thinking of that video...XD
Personally, I think RP weddings are adorable. I love RPing, despite the fact that I'm on a PvP server. The amount of effort going into one of those must be astounding.
I say kudos to those being wed! Matzeltov!
Raiu Apr 20th 2009 1:35AM
I was hired as a guard for a wedding, because some one was going to object to the union. A three minute duel and me realizing that this guy was actually trying to beat me, i came out on top after blowing a few CDs and he left quietly sobbing about lost love and cheating nelfs.
Veliaf Apr 20th 2009 1:43AM
Apparently no one else is thinking this - but congratulations David :) Best of luck!
Cadychan Apr 20th 2009 1:46AM
Oh! And yes! *embarrassed* v_v
Congratulations, David! May the future hold nothing but love, happiness and prosperity! :D