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All of the latest Mists of Pandaria newsBreakfast topic: Your priority list
by Amanda Dean 
May 14th 2009 at 8:00AM
We got an email from a reader concerned with the amount of time he spends playing WoW. It seems to be negatively impacting his school and social lives. Most of us manage to balance out WoW time with our real life obligations, but there is a strong possibility that addiction can set in. I cannot stress enough the importance of balance.I think that one of the keys to keeping both your WoW life and your real life balanced is by identifying your priority list. Every once in a while do a reality check and make sure you're keeping it in line. For me WoW sits somewhere between work and sleep (then again, I've never slept much). My guildies know that I will not be on on Friday nights, that's "sister time." I do play WoW when I'm on work trips, but I never go anywhere particularly exciting.
If you find that you're having trouble with focus on the real world, or your seriously considering making your own WoWPod, you may need to make some adjustments. You can try keeping a calendar to schedule your play time around your outside obligations. You may find that you need to drastically decrease your play time, you may even have to give up the game all together.
If you find you're seriously slipping, you can and should seek professional help. Ask your doctor or school counselor for a referral. Remember: don't replace WoW with another another unhealthy addiction. Keep in mind that there are some things that are more important than WoW.
Where does WoW fit on your priority list?
Filed under: Tips, Virtual selves, Breakfast Topics, Forums
Reader Comments (Page 3 of 4)
Andrew May 14th 2009 9:18AM
I'm obsessed with this game and will play it whenever I get the chance.
I have 2-3 solid sessions on wow a week and maybe a bit of a binge at the weekends doing heroics.
I recently had to stop raiding because the late nights and time spent infront of WoW was having a serious impact on my relationship. I didn't want somthing that I really enjoy part me from the people who are more important in my life.
Everyone in my guild respected that decision and I'm not the only one in my guild who has had to stop raiding because of similar circumstances.
Bottom line is real life always trumps WoW.
Someshta May 14th 2009 9:16AM
What a nice idea with "sister fridays"! I would have those too, if only we didn't live apart because of University. :(
Hal May 14th 2009 9:19AM
What makes this difficult is the reward scheme. That is, WoW (and games like it) offer significant (relatively speaking) rewards for only modest time investments. Everyone feels that little "surge" when they turn in a quest, win a roll for equipment, or ding a new level. Everyone's had that moment when they think to themselves, "Just one more quest, and then I'll turn it off."
This can be problematic if the in-game rewards start feeling more significant than real life. Most people don't have comparable wealth, power, or prestige in real life, so it's easy to get sucked into a virtual world.
All I can suggest is that people who start finding themselves on this edge ought to evaluate, and make changes to, their current situation.
sprout_daddy May 14th 2009 9:28AM
Well said.
I quit last week. By my count, this is the fourth time I've quit in three years of playing WoW. I've transferred servers, left guilds, changed a lot of things to change my routine, but I do find WoW sucks up more of my time than I plan despite repeated changes in the playing style. The "just one more quest" thing always gets me.
I don't know if I play WoW too much - I'm pretty sure I do, but my unusual job (I'm a business school professor) allows me a little more time at home and odd hours, so when I have nothing to do, I tend to play WoW. The problem is that I sometimes play for an hour at lunch and an hour turns into two or three - it's about finishing something up. In the evening, WoW replaces TV time, but I'm not sure the previous hobby was healthy, much less WoW.
Part of why I quit is that I'm bored with game - nothing really feels new anymore, not after seven maxed out toons, multiple xpacks, etc. But the other part of why I quit is that I'm not really sure that I'm spending my time wisely. I put my wife and daughter first, and have consistently done so, but I do feel that I could do more of that if I did less of WoW.
So I understand the people who say they are addicted. I think that addiction is at least 51% mental, and I've found that despite all my other interests, it's easy to get WoW on the brain.
Mep May 14th 2009 9:26AM
I admittedly used to play the game ENTIRELY too much... funny thing is, since I started http://www.wow-achievements.com that takes all my time... so I replaced the game, with a website about the game that makes me money ... good trade imo :)
Perlin May 14th 2009 9:27AM
My priority list:
- Physical / Family Emergencies
- Work
- Relational / Friend Emergencies
- Sleep
- Personal activities (cleaning, groceries, etc)
- Pre-planned Hobby events (Being a referee is my main hobby)
- Pre-planned Social events (watching the new Star Trek movie for example)
- Pre-planned WoW events (incl Raiding)
- Random social events
- Random WoW events.
WoW is pretty low on the lists really. And that is the healthy way to handle it. I used to play too much and when I simply made the list and forced myself to follow it, it became normal behaviour after a while and I now fully control when and why I play WoW.
Shellfire May 14th 2009 9:30AM
I do find the game a bit addictive, but only in the sense that I am competitive. So I WANT all the cool raid gear and to have all my professions maxed out. And to get all my toons to 80. And to get all the titles and acheivements. I also enjoy the camraderie of online friends. Well, I could go on and on about things I like in the game...
I wasn't getting much sleep and I found myself thinking about what I was going to accomplish each night, while still in work. I had to re-think that competitive spirit to allow myself to reduce my play time. Guildies miss me on raids now (and I'm not getting into Ulduar at all), but I think my life is more balanced. And I'm actually getting about 4-5 hours of sleep at night!
Some of the addictiveness comes from each players own personality. It really is up to each person to control their time spent on their in-game life and real life.
Catt May 14th 2009 9:34AM
Agree that you need to get your priorities straight. My hubby got me playing WoW and i loved it from day 1. We use to play every evening till morning - which was fun since we didnt have any kids etc. But then i got pregnant the first time around and our priority change. Since then we have slowed down a lot. We sometimes dont play for a long time and take a break. Now each other, our son, family etc comes first.
We also in a wonderful guild that puts RL first. They understand when hubby goes afk in middle of a fight to go look in on our son and when i have lots of bio's (being pregnant for the second time) - him being dps and me being healer/MT tank. They are really an amazing bunch of ppl.
My hubby is also a wonderful person - he loves to pvp when im not playing - but if i need his help he will drop what he is doing and help me fist (it is really funny when he gets back and all you hear is "omg im dead how did that happen")
As much as i love the game the love for my hubby, son and family are way more.
So if the game becomes a chore firstly or you become to much of a hermit cause you play to much then you should really take a break and get your head straight.
MechChef May 14th 2009 9:42AM
I used to play a lot more. Even raided for a while.
Then I started building a social life for myself in this town and realized I don't have the time to devote to WoW. Then I found a gf and WoW time has fallen into the basement.
Candina@WH May 14th 2009 9:44AM
WoW as an addiction. How about WoW as a coping mechanism?
I suffer from chronic pain. [spinal injury]. When it all gets too much, I play WoW. It is immersive and I can focus the pain away.
There are days when It gets bad enough I can't play wow. Med --> Sleep. Wow doesn't interfere with my work, the Pain does.
cg May 14th 2009 9:47AM
12 week old baby
wife
work
friends
rest of family (live by in-laws, or this would be higher haha)
events for family and friends
events for work
eating
sleeping
WoW(insider)
Actually haven't played it for a year or more, and even then it was at a friend's house once every other week. That's why my highest lvl character is a 62 lock. Love the game though, in fact, one of my favorite games of all time. Being away from it makes you appreciate how awesome it can be and it removes any of the (recreational) stress or drama that you see other people experience.
It's a fun game. I'm happy for this site, because even though I don't play games or get to log in anymore, it's great to read what's going on.
Nolan Rumble May 14th 2009 9:58AM
I usually sacrifice sleep in order to play this game. My wife doesn't like WoW at all, so I usually hang out with her until she goes to bed, then I get to play. I raid late at night with my guild, from 11:30pm -3:00 am Friday Saturday night. It's killing me, but it's a blast. We have downed about 9 bosses in Ulduar and cleared Naxx
Shep May 14th 2009 10:00AM
Although video games aren't physically addictive, it's very likely that it becomes habitual for someone to play this game. I like comparing it to hanging out with friends in RL. You may have a habit of always grouping with a certain group of kids after school, they may quite likely be your best friends.
At a certain point, the group changes it behaviour towards the violent, and abuse: Drinking, smoking, vandalism. Even though you know this is wrong, you might pressure yourself to change as well since it is easy to persuade yourself that this is expected of you.
In WoW, you might have been playing for a very long time and you might feel that is has become expected of you to raid, to improve your gear, to max cooking/fishing/first aid, to grind your dailies and to be on 24/7 in case you are 'needed'.
Like with a group of 'bad' friends, it is important to realise that this game does not really want anything from you. So, take some good time to answer this question (the one I feel this article is hinting at): What do you want from WoW?
Personally, I don't have time to play the game atm. So I just read WoWInsider, which I still really like. I'd like to see Ulduar some day, but I think people will still be running it when 3.3 is out, so no need to rush.
biglou May 14th 2009 10:00AM
I was in a similar situation with time (though it wasnt interfering too much with RL)- I was a healer/officer in a raiding guild and was always on call for raids or instances...spent too much time playing the game for the needs of the guild and other people and was generally not having a very good time. Soooo, I did the unthinkable for a very well geared Holy Pally......I left my guild (on good terms of course) and plan to remain guildless until I get bored. Now I can do whatever instances I want (most pugs arent that bad), I can continue my quest for my "Of the Alliance" title, I can farm when I want to, and I dont have to listen to repeated requests for "we need you NOW" or "can you please heal this heroic". Most importantly, I can guiltlessly get offline whenever I choose for Real Life aggro.
The end result is that my alts are getting leveled again, I was able to get epic flyers for 2 of my alts, My main is able to BG more and do arenas without constant interruptions, and oh yah, I enjoy playing again =D
Dev. May 14th 2009 7:55PM
I quit a few months ago.
My gf and I led a raiding guild together for a year until one day in Naxx, a little error while giving out loot went wrong. We argued, shouted at each other, slammed doors etc etc.
Then reality hit.
Why are we fighting and being angry at each other over a damn game (as well as 23 others whom we have not met??). We realised we were putting this game over a 5+ year relationship.
It had to stop and that was the final straw for us and we have since quit. Not turning back ever. We fight A LOT less (hardly ever actually) and are much happier now.
We do other things together now, like playing Rock Band/Guitar Hero ("quickie" games are our favourite now... less commitment and instant satisfaction), collaborate on artwork (we're both artists), watch TV and enjoy our 10 hour sleep per night!
I would seriously advise anyone who spends 8+ hours a day playing the game to re-evaluate their life (I used to skip college and refuse shift work as a casual just to play WoW 12+ hours a day). It's not healthy!!
The time you spend playing WoW can be put elsewhere. Self development is a big one in my opinion... 5+ hours a day playing WoW, convert that into 5+ hours of self development... just think about it...
Cadychan May 14th 2009 10:17AM
It's a bit weird for me, considering the webcomic and extra art I do -is- WoW-related, but ironically enough, I only get about 3-8 hours of actual game time a week. I'm also a workaholic (not good, I know, but I'm getting better), but my actual job, staying fit, and any extra art/comic work all come before the game. I was never a big TV watcher, but I try and squeeze in some WoW when I get the chance.
So, I mean, WoW is a bit part of my life, just...not so much the -actual game- (as weird as that sounds). ^_^;
Andy May 14th 2009 10:19AM
I raided heavily throughout college, when my late-start classes allowed me to be up until 1am every night. Now that I've graduated and am working full time as a teacher, I simply don't have that time commitment. Sure, I'd love to see Ulduar, but I can't invest hours at a time to play and progress.
I'm at the point now where though I love the game, I generally log on to do some dailys, maybe a heroic or 10-man EoE, and log off. For me, although raiding is/was a blast, my real enjoyment is the leveling process with close RL friends.
To that end I have been playing Lord of the Rings Online with my long-time gaming partner, and we are slowly making our way through the levels, enjoying the process in a fresh environment. Though I play WoW, it isn't a priority in my life.
Chris May 14th 2009 10:35AM
WoW, when it comes down to it, is last priority for me. Its what i do when i have nothing else i HAVE to do.
I can see the point about how hardcore raiding schedule can log you less time than casual raiding, but the main difference is this:
Hot Girl: Hey wanna go do ____ tomorrow night?
Raider: No, i can't. how about the next day?
Hot Girl: Why can't you tomorrow?
Raider: oh ... I got ... something ... going on.
Hot Girl: What?
Raider: FINE, i play WoW and i cant go cuz im going to play wow!!
whatever the event, saying "i cant go, i have a raid that night" is unacceptable imo. Thats why i don't adhere to a raid schedule anymore.
Andrew R. May 14th 2009 10:38AM
I'm an EMT on a squad full time. I work four days at 12 hours each. I come home, eat dinner, relax and go to bed. I play WoW on my off days and when I have nothing else going on. The game isn't going anywhere if I don't login for a few days.
Heric May 14th 2009 11:26AM
Blizzard advertises in their tips that if you are having time management issues (playing too much), you can set up parental controls to limit play time.
Not that an adult couldn't override, but that would effectively help those of us with weak inpulse control.