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8-07-2009 @ 2:15PM
Hey guys,I read the site occasionally, mainly to figure out where to most efficiently spend my limited playtime.I try to watch the videos, but they have all been embarrassingly bad. (Blind was well done)Here are some pointers.1. Don't make your video 19 minutes long. If your video is bad and 2 minutes long i have a better chance of sitting through it to find at least some good in it.Honestly to all you shorts makers out there, especially machinamators. Don't make your video over 2 minutes long if you want people to watch it.2. Don't give yourself a production company name and head credits. We get it, you are making a movie like you see in the theatre. Guess what? I'm on the internet in a hand me down office chair looking at a 3"x 2" window on my 80 dollar 19" monitor. There is nothing that is going to make me feel like I'm at a real theatre. Real movie makers don't want credits messing up their picture. Get into the action.3. If you are serious, get people who know something about a certain craft involved. Just because you figured out after effects in your spare time doesn't mean you know anything about a 3 act structure, or composition or timing or even camera axis.4. Get a microphone. If you are insistent we need to hear your terrible voice blabber your terrible dialogue, don't use a terrible microphone. There is a reason people get paid to do voice over work, there is a reason an actor is successful. If Brad Pitt sounded like Pee Wee Herman in a high school production he would be a good looking gas station attendant with 0 african babies. If you are serious hire a local actor, there are a ton that would be willing to do this for free. At the very least make sure your audio is at an acceptable even level throughout. You want to make sure your dialogue is the most audible, music and sound effects are next. The flashing meter at the side of your video editing software should always peak at the same level, go for -20 to -12 db.5. Don't get excited over your buddies telling you your movie is awesome. It's probably not. Get another opinion. Look at Marlon Wayans.You can sit and laugh at the crappy singers on American Idol, and then submit a video like this one oblivious that you are doing the exact same thing to the art of movie making.6. If you are not very funny, make sure your story has a point. If you are funny, make sure your story has a point. Honestly, in homage to John Hughes. You gotta make sure your story is interesting to the listener.7. Be willing to accept not everything you do is great. Just because a shot took a long time to composite together or you love a gag that doesnt really fit with the story, doesn't mean you have to keep it.Always make sure you are not boring the guts out of people with your self indulgent nonsense. Always make sure what you do serves the story. 8. Scrolling credits are another self indulgent hollywood thing. You don't need them. its a union thing. Your non union low end production doesn't need credits, unless one of the actors i told you to hire requests it. Chances are your video will be posted on a website with all the credits for people to read as they wish. If someone picks it up and it goes to DVD, or released as a feature length film you will probably have to waste time on credits.9. Stop copying stuff. We get it, computer people doing shocking stuff is shocking. Guess what, I don't care anymore. I cared a little bit when South Park made a funny little cartoon character swear. I cared when Godzilla met bambi. I care no longer. Do something original. Tell a story. Stop using the medium as a crutch.10. I'm done. I hope this helps. Sorry to be harsh, but it's never going to get better if people just keep telling you its good, or people tell you its bad but don't tell you why.
8-07-2009 @ 8:07PM
You seem to have completely missed the comedy in this.
8-07-2009 @ 3:22PM
"...looking at a 3"x 2" window on my 80 dollar 19" monitor."Now, you can click on this little icon labeled "full screen" and...WOW...just like on TV! Whodathunkit?"Scrolling credits are another self indulgent hollywood thing. You don't need them. its a union thing."It's called giving credit where credit is due. If I use a song, I want to give credit to the artist. If I use someone else's video clip (which is done all throughout the NST series), I want to give credit to the people who MADE the frackin' thing. Would you rather we just ripped people off and claimed it as our own?"If you are insistent we need to hear your terrible voice blabber your terrible dialogue..."This is assuming that everyone sounds like ass."Sorry to be harsh..."No you're not, you just like to be a asshole. Hence the tone in your few other posts.L2Troll.
8-07-2009 @ 4:17PM
TV, vs internet, vs movies.Without getting into a qoute a thon. Good point. I'm happy you enjoyed this video. Without people like you Charlie Sheen would not have a top rated tv show.You are keeping actors and in turn prostitutes employed. thanks!Credits. You think Green Day gives a poo if you use their song in your garbage video? Wait I'll answer that, they don't, so don't worry about it. Seeing as you are so noble, if you really want to give an artist credit, let them actually judge whether they want to be associated with your video. Do it like they do in the real world. ASCAP, ask permission. Don't try to act like you are doing them a service with your self indulgent credits.Ass Voice.The majority of Dialogue in this particular video was hard to hear. And generally in every video i have heard. As a good example, use Blind by Percula, he knew his strength was animation, so he didnt sweat a story heavy in dialogue. Percula wins!Troll.I'm sorry man, I am. I left you guys alone too long. I need to right some things.Using the latest internet fad dialogue makes me not respect you immediately as well.
8-07-2009 @ 5:29PM
wow. make your own video period. its well and good of u to criticize hard work without contributing to the machinima community. If you don't like don't watch it. you have the power of your mouse. the show was great.. i had no trouble hearing the voices and i chuckled more then once. a success to me.
8-09-2009 @ 8:52PM
Hey Asteer.11. People are not going to like your videos and you are going to have to accept that. no reason to defend a video you have nothing invested in. Choose your battles.12. If a professional offers advice on how to make better movies, take the advice and make better movies.13. I have been involved in feature film, shorts and television editorial for 10 years. I have made movies. 14. I did use my mouse, I moused over to the post comment button. This particular movie is terrible. if you chuckled you must have been thinking about a joke you heard earlier. if the guy who made this movie is a movie maker he should be able to take this criticism fine and i'm sure he will be okay, don't worry about him. 15. I'm here to help, if people don't want criticism don't post your videos on a public forum.
8-09-2009 @ 3:30PM
@AsteerThat's the stupidest excuse ever. "Make your own". Critics don't have to make their own stuff, because their job is to give opinions weighted on how they felt about the movie, not in compare what they could do better with the skill set they have.
8-11-2009 @ 12:31PM
hey Hollywood, gtfo. we play wow, we like the movie. its funny. take another xanax.
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