Dear Diary: I've now been stranded on this ice floe for ten godforsaken days. My tail feathers are so iced over that they crack into pieces whenever I try to move. The hunger is worse today; I think all of the penguins that were dumb enough to come over and "look at the fire" have become my dinner, and the ones that are left are too smart to get within my reach. They stay an arm's length away, taunting me with their freshly caught fish. Curse that survival of the fittest! My hopes that the Kalu'aks will come searching for their crashed ferry and rescue me are wearing thin. I fear that unless the zeppelin crew spots me today, this may be my last journal entry. -- Serthida of <Elder Tribunal> on Bloodhoof.