Patch 3.3 not released tomorrow, Zarhym hates cranberries and Azeroth
by Adam Holisky 
Nov 23rd 2009 at 7:40PM
Simple true statement of the day: Patch 3.3 will not be released Tuesday November 24th, 2009.
Zarhym hopped on the fourms earlier this evening and said that the patch will not be dropping tomorrow, and that they don't consider dropping a patch before a long holiday weekend something they want to do. We agree.
Zarhym goes on to say that he doesn't prefer his day-after-thanksgiving turkey with cranberry sauce on it. That, ladies and gentleman, is a travesty. A total slap in the face to all us cranberry loving mortals out there. Is Zarhym really against cranberries because one day he ate too many cranberries, abused them, and then went on a cranberry induced rampage killing off entire swaths of AV players with his Martin Fury, only to laugh at and teabag everyone who tried to stop him?
I'm not saying he did, I'm just asking a question. Zarhym hasn't given an answer, and without one, well... well, what can consider to be the truth then? I think you know the truth my beautiful Azeroth. I think you do. /tear.
Zarhym hopped on the fourms earlier this evening and said that the patch will not be dropping tomorrow, and that they don't consider dropping a patch before a long holiday weekend something they want to do. We agree.
Zarhym goes on to say that he doesn't prefer his day-after-thanksgiving turkey with cranberry sauce on it. That, ladies and gentleman, is a travesty. A total slap in the face to all us cranberry loving mortals out there. Is Zarhym really against cranberries because one day he ate too many cranberries, abused them, and then went on a cranberry induced rampage killing off entire swaths of AV players with his Martin Fury, only to laugh at and teabag everyone who tried to stop him?
I'm not saying he did, I'm just asking a question. Zarhym hasn't given an answer, and without one, well... well, what can consider to be the truth then? I think you know the truth my beautiful Azeroth. I think you do. /tear.
Update 7:50 p.m. EDT: We've placed a red phone in the WoW.com HQ. It's sitting right here. We've given the number to your chief of staff, Zarhym. You can call it and refute your Martin Fury incident anytime you want. Azeroth is waiting.
Update 9:45 p.m. EDT: WoW.com would like to apologize for its use of cranberry pictures from other, more popular, cranberry related events. We agree with Zarhym when he says that this is the time to put aside differences and put gravy on our turkey sandwiches, of course as long as the turkeys come from Azeroth. No Draenor turkeys for us.
Patch 3.3 is the last major patch of Wrath of the Lich King. With the new Icecrown Citadel 5-man dungeons and 10/25-man raid arriving soon, patch 3.3 will deal the final blow to Arthas. WoW.com's Guide to Patch 3.3 will keep you updated with all the latest patch news.Filed under: Patches, News items
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
MayDay Nov 23rd 2009 7:47PM
Awesome Glen Beck call-out. Didn't expect it from this site, which made it so much better.
To clarify, WoW is mostly apolitical, unless you're discussing horde/alliance :)
Raynier Nov 23rd 2009 7:52PM
Are you now or have you ever been a Cran-hate-ist?
Skonged Nov 24th 2009 9:22AM
Even the mention of Glen causes shivers of idiocy to wash over my thoughts like a tilde wave of ignorance and bigotry.
Hasteur Nov 23rd 2009 7:48PM
Going too far? He didn't say he hates cranberries. He just doesn't like cranberry sauce, he just said he didn't like it on the turkey. I personally agree with him. I much prefer the gravy on the turkey
Adam Holisky Nov 23rd 2009 7:52PM
It's never too far, Azeroth. And with cranberry hating people like Zarhym ruling this world, how can we truly ever be free from the demonic legions of the twisting void?
I cry not because we've gone too far, but we haven't gone far enough! /chokesup.
Sarakin Nov 23rd 2009 8:25PM
I personally enjoyed the south park reference (if i'm correct in assuming) and I also love the cranberry sauce
ToyChristopher Nov 23rd 2009 8:29PM
I love cranberries. They prevent urinary tract infections. I don't like them on turkey. Does that mean I hate freedom?
greenthumbs Nov 23rd 2009 8:38PM
zomg Zarhym hates Cranberries...
TH1S I5 THE 3ND OF WOW!!!
Sgent Nov 23rd 2009 8:42PM
Its a reference to Glen Beck. The Southpark episode was a parody of him.
Al Nov 23rd 2009 8:51PM
I do hope said hotline phone isn't a Cranberry shade of red, he'll never think of calling it.
jslim419 Nov 23rd 2009 10:19PM
"It's never too far, Azeroth. And with cranberry hating people like Zarhym ruling this world, how can we truly ever be free from the demonic legions of the twisting void?
I cry not because we've gone too far, but we haven't gone far enough! /chokesup."
I love you Adam. and not in a "hey bro. lets go get a beer and watch the game" kind of way. I love you in a "lets move to Massachusetts and get married, and feed each other strawberries every so gently for the rest of our lives" kind of way.
/wink
/wink
Minos Nov 23rd 2009 10:38PM
I'll add another echo to this. Cranberries are delicious, but not on turkey.
In the sweet potato, though... now we're talking!
Undra Nov 24th 2009 1:39AM
I cry because I'm laughing so hard.
Cowy Nov 23rd 2009 7:50PM
I like fresh cranberry sauce with orange zest. that Jello stuff that plops out of a can like a giant tube of red dog food, or a giant blood clot? Not so hot on that.
For me, good sauce has actual cranberry bits in it.
doug Nov 23rd 2009 7:53PM
Zarhym just shot himself in the foot.
I don't know how much the rest of you know about Thanksgiving culture (I'm an expert), but honor and shame are huge parts of it. It's not like Fourth of July where you can become successful by being an asshole. If you screw someone over on Thanksgiving, you bring shame to yourself, and the only way to get rid of that shame is repentance.
What this means is Thanksgiving lovers, after reading this post, are not going to want to reply to any of Zarhym's posts again, nor will they read anymore of his threads. This is HUGE. You can laugh all you want, but Zarhym has alienated an entire holiday with this move.
Zarhym, publicly apologize and close this thread or you can kiss your stuffing goodbye.
Noscy Nov 23rd 2009 8:25PM
You sir are the Champion of holiday spirit...
I myself have been ostracized from the Christmas Holiday because of a Cookie and Milk incident back in 98. Now people look at me in the street with scorn... it's just horrible...
Hoggersbud Nov 23rd 2009 7:54PM
So that leaves what? Some week in December? I can't imagine they'd want to push the patch as far as January, but I suppose it could happen.
Maybe?
Graham Nov 23rd 2009 8:18PM
My money is on December 8th. Though maybe the 15th is more realistic.
I would be very surprised if they waited until January. They gotta give us new stuff to do during the holiday breaks. :D
artifex Nov 24th 2009 6:19PM
Sometime JUST AFTER I finish my last 3 Proof of Demises, I hope. (It and the Timear achievement are no longer offered in 3.3)
Fierna Nov 23rd 2009 8:00PM
He hates the cranberries? But their hit single "Zombie" was fantastic? Does he just hate them or all Irish people in general?