The Night Before Winter Veil

'Twas the night before Winter Veil and all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, sans a click of the mouse
The presents were stored by the tree with great care,
In hopes that Grand' Winter would soon be there;
The orphans were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Pandaren Brew danced in their heads;
And my guildie in her 'kerchief, and I in my helm,
Had just settled down for a long battle-ground,
When out of the mine there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my mammoth to see what was the matter.
Away to the entrance I jogged like a flash,
Tore open the door as I threw up the latch.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to the objects below,
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,
With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be thine old Ghost!
More rapid than gryphons his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;
"Now, Vashj! Now, Kael! On Yogg and Arthas!
On, Neth! On Bornakk! On Zarhym and Metzen!
To the top of the arena! Don't scale those walls!
Now sprint away! Dash away! Intercept away all!"
As dry leaves that before the druid hurricane fly,
When they meet with an elite, mount to the sky,
So up to the mountain-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of gnome bombs, and Dr. Crawler too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard in the mine
The prancing and pawning of each tiny nerf.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down from the sky Dr. Crawler came with a bound.
He was dressed all in twill, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with trolls and soot;
A bundle of nerfs he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a dev having just tossed back some Jack.
His eyes -- how they twinkled! His nerfs how merry!
He smote those trolls, and then nerfed their parry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the jib of his chin laughed at the epic-so-ammo;
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;
He had a broad face and a crazy pally stroll,
That shook, when he nerfed their drunken face roll.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know that I had everything to dread;
He spoke but quaint word, and went straight to work,
Nerfing my class right in-front of my berth;
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the mine's wall he rose;
He sprang to the sleigh, out of range of my Storm,
And away they all flew like the down of the Nogg';
But I heard him exclaim, ere he flew out of sight,
"Happy Winter Veil's to all, and to all a nerffing night!"
Filed under: Fan stuff






Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
naseem jones Dec 24th 2009 8:05PM
wow santa's swiging the nerf bat. great poem though seems like it took alot of effort. 8 out of 10!!!
Khremloc Dec 24th 2009 8:06PM
Merry christmas, wow.com. :)
Chukie Dec 24th 2009 8:10PM
Aw you'd think he'd bring buffs for christmas... he brings nerfs every other day of the year.
Koraya Dec 24th 2009 8:24PM
Apparently, someone has been naughty this year...
Undra Dec 24th 2009 8:26PM
Bravo!
Alanid Dec 24th 2009 8:31PM
Nerf's for everyone!
Would laugh if when I logged in tomorrow everything had actually been nerfed and there was a giant statue of Ghostcrawler in every capital with a sack over his shoulder smiling widely.
NeoPhobos Dec 24th 2009 9:55PM
Wrong holiday... What you are explaining is April Fools Day, sans the sack over his shoulder.
The joke? The nerfs aren't just for April 1st. Heh heh heh...
Irem Dec 24th 2009 8:55PM
I snorfled. :D
beaglesan Dec 24th 2009 9:11PM
Wrong rhyme.
Now, if you had composed a more appropriate with the theme:
"How the Ghostcrawler Nerfed Winter Veil"
That would be more like it.
Think about it:
"Every Wow down in Wowville liked Winter Veil a lot, but the Ghostcrawler, who lived just north of Wowville - did not. The Ghostcrawler hated Winter Veil - the whole Winter Veil season. Now, please don't ask why; no one quite knows the reason. It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight. Or it could be that his head wasn't screwed on just right. But I think that the most likely reason of all may have been that his heart was two sizes too small."
"...there's a light on this talent tree that won't light on one side. So I'm taking it home to my workshop, my dear. I'll fix it up there, then I'll bring it back here."
"They're finding out now that no Winter Veil is coming! They're just waking up, I know just what they'll do. Their mouths will hang open a minute or two, then the Wows down in Wowville will all cry, 'Boo Hoo.' "
"It came without replenishments! It came without armor penetration! It came without Sweeping Strokes, Bladestorms, or Gigantique Bags!"
"He puzzled and puzzled till his puzzler was sore. Then the Ghostcrawler thought of something he hadn't before! Maybe Winter Veil, he thought, doesn't come from an online store. Maybe Winter Veil... perhaps... means a little bit more! "
"And what happened then? Well, in Wowville they say that the Ghostcrawler's small heart grew three sizes that day. And then - the true meaning of Winter Veil came through, and the Ghostcrawler found the strength of *ten* Ghostcrawlers, plus two!"
Seriosuly, y'all did a very nice job. (mangled quotes courtesy of the IMD)
Conrose Dec 24th 2009 10:50PM
"He had brought it all back,
Except of course for the Pony."
jkarma Dec 24th 2009 9:16PM
And then the sword you've been farming HOR for drops. The 1200DPS hunter with the fos staff drops, he eyes strength and ninjas it. Merry Christmas to me.
Arbitor Dec 24th 2009 9:33PM
Its past midnight here in europe, which means MERRY BLOODY CHRISTMAS!!!
...
But I'll have to wait till morning for RL prezzies, so I guess I'll log in and pick up some WoW prezzies. :D
retrostills Dec 24th 2009 10:25PM
i'm expecting iambic pentameter next year :)
Rookwood Dec 24th 2009 10:33PM
Great poem. Merry Christmas everyone :)
Kizzik Dec 24th 2009 10:44PM
I sure hope Santa doesn't put nerfs in my stocking this year. I don't think my warr could handle it. Of course i could always use a nice shiny new axe. ; )
Shadow Dec 24th 2009 11:18PM
And so it ends for me. My account ran out today and I can't afford to play anymore.
If I could have ONE thing for christmas, it'd be one more day to tell my friends goodbye.
Andrew R. Dec 24th 2009 11:34PM
It's just past 11:30 here on the east coast. My girlfriend(soon to be fiance) is sound asleep with the dog sleeping on my side of the bed. Of course because I'm at the computer it means she can stretch out. HA!
30 minutes to go on the Exodar server until midnight. I'm trying to hold out but my eyelids are so heavy!
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND TO A WOW NIGHT!
Juan C. Flores Dec 25th 2009 12:15AM
Feliz Navidad WoW.com :)
Turlagh Dec 25th 2009 5:35AM
You mean Felix Navidad... Oh wait... that's Wizard 101
Andrew R. Dec 25th 2009 12:18AM
I fail at typing....
It was supposed to say...
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND TO ALL A WOW NIGHT!