Shifting Perspectives: In defense of a glyph everyone hates

I'd be the first to admit I don't take the game quite as seriously as the hardcore theorycrafters at EJ. To be fair to WoW, it's hardly the only game in that position; with the Olympics on, I've had the opportunity to acquaint myself with many questionable pasttimes like curling. Someone even went so far as to set hipster music to a series of clips featuring expert players crouching on the ice, staring down the run with the coiled alertness of a Serengeti hunter. The athletic grace is impressive until you consider that they are watching a large rock slide down the rink at the speed of a miniature dachshund while teammates scrub frantically at the ice in the hopes that the rock will travel a few more inches. One realizes: a). the fundamental absurdity of the human condition, and: b). that the effort to maintain a dignified façade has caused you to soil your pants.
The inability to treat what is meant to be a fun hobby with the gravitas due, say, a shuttle launch or an Irish wake, has occasionally resulted in problems when readers take material more seriously than I do. The official forums have also convinced me that any deviation from the standard imposed by theorycrafters and spreadsheets is going to be greeted with hostility by anyone who decries the notion of individual choice in a game, which makes today's topic -- finding a place for the druid's worst heal in progression raiding -- a bit touchy.
I am required by law and contract to be sensitive to the needs of the differently-minded in our community, and as such, I am going to borrow (read: steal) a technique first employed by the humorist Dave Barry in a 1991 column.
Yes.
The following article has been closed-captioned for the humor-impaired.

As an expert on the subject of druid healing (NOT TRUE) who's currently enjoying the Arthas fight (HE'S KICKING HER ASS), I've found myself wanting to use the Healing Touch glyph with 5/5 Naturalist a lot more. As a general rule, Healing Touch is one of the druid's less-attractive heals (IT'S TERRIBLE) outside of the usual butt-saving Nature's Swiftness + HT macro. It's too slow, it's too big, and by the time you actually land one, the paladins will be laughing all the way to the top of the healing charts. It's for this reason that a Gladiator druid of my acquaintance memorably described the Healing Touch-spamming Dreamstate druid as "a paladin with a permanent Curse of Tongues."
However, a glyphed and specced Healing Touch is another matter. This first came to my attention while doing heroic Anub'arak-25 (HE KICKED HER ASS TOO), because phase 3 turns into a raid healing nightmare between Penetrating Cold and Leeching Swarm. Leeching Swarm does pretty much what it sounds like -- it leeches health from raid members and heals Anub -- so you had to had to keep the raid at a sliver of health to have a prayer of killing him (OR STACK SHAMANS WITH GLYPHED HEALING STREAM TOTEM, GG). But Penetrating Cold was periodically applied to 5 raid members, doing 6K damage a tick to people who were already hovering around 1-2K life. Essentially you had a second or two to react to a Penetrating Cold target in the raid, because the debuff killed them on the first tick. But -- this gets better (SARCASM) -- you couldn't heal them for too much, because it fed Anub'arak more health. Most raids typically assigned healers to specific Penetrating Cold targets in the raid (BRB DOWNLOADING ADDON THAT IS TOTALLY NOT NECESSARY TO THE SUCCESS OF THE ENCOUNTER) (MORE SARCASM) to limit overhealing.
I was initially skeptical (SHE WAS TOO CHEAP TO RESPEC) because Nourish was a 1.1 second cast for me at the time, and I was dubious about the benefits of a heal that was only marginally faster. For that matter, it's hard to get behind a flash heal that bears the additional burden of scaling worse than Nourish (SHE WAS TOO CHEAP TO BUY THE GLYPH).
But it wasn't even a contest. Healing Touch saved my targets. Nourish did not.
Here's the thing about a glyphed and specced Healing Touch:
It's fast.
Really, really fast.
At the soft +haste cap (856 without 3/3 Celestial Focus or 735 with it), Healing Touch fires at a speed of roughly 0.7 seconds, and it's important to note that raid-damage auras or boss debuffs never tick faster than once per second. If your latency is decent (THAT NEVER HAPPENS), it's possible for you to land a 7-10K heal on a target before the next damage tick occurs, or even as it's happening. On progression content with unpredictable damage spikes, anything you don't outgear, or (THE TRUTH EMERGES) lots of raid mistakes, Healing Touch is a lifesaver.
Honestly, this entire article could just be a flag waved on behalf of bucking the "Do this or you're a terrible player" trend in favor of doing what works best for you, but WoW.com has standards (IMPLEMENTED AFTER SHE WAS HIRED) that require me to expand on that a bit. We have such a commitment to journalistic excellence that, when the editors develop a hankering to know what is going on inside a burning building, they send one of the more disposable staff members to investigate (THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED). So after researching this issue extensively (SHE MADE A SANDWICH), I have developed a set of criteria wherein a glyphed and talented Healing Touch may have a place in your arsenal:
Advantages:
- Absolutely addictive speed.
- Great compensation for unpredictable damage on progression content.
- if you don't have another resto druid in the raid (and thus can't blanket the whole raid in HoTs), it's a good way to spot-touch damage that wasn't cushioned.
- Drives the rest of the healing team into a frothing rage sniping their targets.
- The rest of your healing team might be armed.
- Chews through mana. Do not glyph or spec for it if you have mana issues.
- Nature's Swiftness + Healing Touch is far less effective.
- You'll have to free up 5 talent points for Naturalist and a major glyph slot at the very least.
- Generally pointless if there's another resto druid in the raid and the two of you can blanket everyone with HoTs. If that's so, leave the spot-healing to the classes who can do it more efficiently.
- If it's the kind of encounter where the raid stacks up, Chain Heal will drink your milkshake.
- Lord Marrowgar: Bone Spike, people who can't stay out of fire.
- Professor Putricide: Malleable Goo, although technically no one should be getting hit by it (HA HA!).
- Blood Queen Lana'thel: Pact of the Darkfallen and people who screw up positioning during Bloodbolt Whirl. HoTs will otherwise stomp this encounter.
- Lich King: Infest, particularly past phase 1.
- Faction gunships: There's really not much healing required on this encounter, and nobody should be getting hit by the Sergeant mobs' Bladestorm but a tank.
- Deathbringer Saurfang: Priests, paladins, and Beacon of Light own this fight once a Mark goes out.
- Festergut: HoTs, HoTs, and HoTs. If you are alive and it is within range, it should have Rejuv on it.
- Rotface: People who screw up positioning may have to get bailed out on occasion.
- Valithria Dreamwalker: HT is absolutely not what you should be using to heal the dragon herself; HoT her up and Nourish away. Otherwise, HT can be useful to get dangerously low people up if the raid's not good about interrupting Frostbolt Volley, or doesn't get Blazing Skeletons down quickly enough. If you find yourself using it a lot, however, something is very wrong.
- Sindragosa: There's an unfortunate element of luck to this encounter concerning how many healers get Unchained Magic, and DPS learning the fight are also likely to make mistakes breaking people out of Ice Tombs too quickly or being on the wrong side of one during a Frost Bomb. An experienced raid is unlikely to need it much, but otherwise I would nominate Sindragosa as a good encounter for which to keep a glyphed HT in reserve.
1. Do what works best for you, and don't be afraid to experiment.
2. What works best for you is going to depend a lot on who else is healing in your raids, the nature of the encounter, and -- to be frank -- how fast your fellow healers are, and how good the raid is at avoiding damage.
Now, if you will excuse me, I need to go prep my inbox for the coming flood of angry curling enthusiasts (SRSLY).
Every week, Shifting Perspectives treks across Azeroth in pursuit of truth, beauty, and insight concerning the druid class. Sometimes it finds the latter, or something good enough for government work. Whether you're a Bear, Cat, Moonkin, Tree, or stuck in caster form, we've got the skinny on druid changes in patch 3.3, a look at the disappearance of the bear tank, and thoughts on why you should be playing the class (or why not).Filed under: Druid, Analysis / Opinion, Humor, (Druid) Shifting Perspectives
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Reader Comments (Page 3 of 5)
doug Feb 23rd 2010 7:47PM
Do you even know what a hipster is?
vazhkatsi Feb 23rd 2010 8:40PM
someone with an enlarged gluteus maximus?
Possum Feb 23rd 2010 8:55PM
I think its a kind of....pants...right?
Allison Robert Feb 23rd 2010 10:12PM
A spreading cancer upon the planet.
(Yes, I lived in NYC).
Coldbear Feb 23rd 2010 7:47PM
I smiled. Which doesn't happen too often these days.
cmichaelcooper Feb 23rd 2010 7:53PM
Curling is just Shuffleboard on Hard Mode.
Discount_Llama Feb 23rd 2010 10:51PM
Which clearly makes it the true progression content.
Roland Feb 23rd 2010 7:57PM
Or...
Reroll Shaman, Glyph LHW, keep Earth Shield up, spam LHW (or HW with 2pc T10). :D
Also Alli, you should read more Hipster Runoff before you start libeling them (us?).
IHavePants Feb 23rd 2010 8:28PM
Great article. I've been wanting to experiment with taking HT seriously and you've inspired me to finally get around to it.
Allison Robert Feb 24th 2010 2:18PM
Even glyphed and specced, it's still not a mainline heal, but in good gear (i.e. at the soft haste cap without Celestial Focus) you can spare the points for Naturalist without gimping yourself. I just really, really like having an option for a 0.7 second 7-10K heal at my disposal in the event that someone makes a mistake.
Make no mistake, HoTs are still way more important (and Nourish way better as a tank healer), but glyphed HT is my favorite ass-saver.
Wild Colors Feb 23rd 2010 8:47PM
Hah, great column! I have enough mana issues trying to keep my 10-man constantly blanketed, so I think I should stay away for now...
Choline Feb 23rd 2010 9:27PM
I love curling! It's a wonderful game that takes more skill and more athleticism than you think.
High-end curling is kinda comparable to a raid that ALWAYS CHANGES. Obviously we're comparing apples and oranges here, but bear with me as I make the metaphor.
Consider that a raider must hone their skills, get the optimum gear, and know what to do when. If the raid composition is a constant, the only mitigating factors include strategy and knowledge of the enemies to beat. The HP of the enemies and the circumstances in which they arrive do not normally change from raid attempt to raid attempt.
A curler must hone their skills (something that can take YEARS, as it's more about "feel" than about numbers), get good gear, and know what to do when. However, consider the many more mitigating factors that can add to or take away from a rink's (team's) success: The ice conditions during a curling game can change; not only from game to game but from end-to-end. The ice conditions must be "read", or played through, so that curlers get a "feel" for how their rocks will travel.
And take-out weight rocks can be faaaaaaaast. I've run balls-out (bad idiom maybe; I don't have balls) down the sheet, chasing a stone that was hell-bent on telling another stone to GTFO the house.
Imagine if Arthas's hit points went up and down due to some sort of mechanic that could not be quantified throughout your raid. And, when you go to fight him next week, he's got more HP than he did last time. That's the kinda ever-changing circumstances curlers have to deal with.
Though, if you could throw bits of granite at Arthas and tell him to GTFO that way, perhaps Azeroth wouldn't be in shambles!
Curling nerdity aside, I LOL'd. I LOL'd a *lot*.
I think Dave Barry would be proud. :D
Balmazer Feb 23rd 2010 11:20PM
"[B]ut bear with me"
"Shifting Perspectives"
Can do.
ddt Feb 23rd 2010 10:20PM
"humorist" dave barry
Cetha Feb 23rd 2010 10:41PM
you are too funny! I get excited every time I see a new article of yours, as I love your writing style. Do you write for anything else? published anything?
Malkeinu Feb 23rd 2010 11:46PM
So if you take this glyph, which other glyph are you dropping? Or a better question would be what are your other 2 glyphs you use if you take HT glyph? I assume you would no longer need glyph of nourish. But it wasn't specified. As keeping a normal healing rotation would benefit from still having nourish glyphed and then having the extra HT glyph for "oh crap" moments. Thoughts?
Allison Robert Feb 24th 2010 2:45PM
My own glyphs probably aren't a good example right now because they're tailored to the specific circumstances of my raid, but I'm using Glyph of Healing Touch, Glyph of Innervate, and Glyph of Wild Growth.
Glyph of Healing Touch is being used for the reasons given in the this article -- with 5/5 Naturalist at 859 haste (what I have without Celestial Focus), it's slightly less than a 0.7 second cast and a marvelous ass-saver on fights with random burst (Blood Queen), or when someone needs to get topped quickly (Lich King). I switched out Glyph of Swiftmend for it, and to be frank, it's an omission that you WILL miss. I am annoyed by it on a daily basis and keep going back and forth over whether to switch Glyph of Innervate (see below) out for it on a more permanent basis.
Glyph of Innervate: I tend to give Innervate to one of my raid's mages because it helps them sustain 10K+ DPS on fights where a boss needs to die as quickly as possible. As we've gotten farther into ICC, I found that the mana return component from the glyph was extremely helpful, and switched this in instead of Nourish because I'm now the raid's only resto druid, and we have two holydins with excellent attendance. I do keep Innervate for myself on really intense fights (Valithria, Lich King, sometimes Sindragosa depending on who keeps getting Unchained Magic). But again, still dickering on whether to switch Swiftmend back into this slot, but the annoyance of having to reapply a HoT < the annoyance of running short on mana-intensive fights, for now.
Glyph of Wild Growth: This one goes without saying. If you raid-heal at all in 25-mans (and most trees will spend the majority of their time on raid-healing), you should have this.
Frank Feb 23rd 2010 11:59PM
While in Feral spec HT is the best heal to get back to solo grinding as quickly as possible. Other than that and the NS/HT combo I've never used it, thouhg I PVP instead of Raid.
Quorniya Feb 24th 2010 12:14AM
Allison, your articles are always hilarious and awesome. Your columns are definitely my favorites on wow.com. I want to have your little druid babies!
rawrawrawr Feb 24th 2010 12:20AM
I'm going to go and roll a druid, just because of how much i loved this article.