Officers' Quarters: Destructive criticism

In the day-to-day duties of an officer and a raid leader, few endeavors are more fraught with the potential for drama than doling out performance advice to your players. Constructive criticism, no matter how well-meaning, can become destructive in the blink of an eye if it's not approached delicately. After scaring off a healer, the officer who wrote this week's email is looking for a better way to deal with these situations.
Scott,
As an officer in my guild, I take care of several things, but the big three are raid leading our second 10-man group (which is not easy as a healer, by any stretch of the imagination), making sure our priests are doing what they are supposed to be doing both as dps and healers, and any extra healers, making sure they're doing their job right. The first two are interesting enough, especially since there's very little consistency with our group, and our number of priests waxes and wanes with the seasons. But the big problem here is when I have to "fix" a healer. Now, I know no one likes to receive constructive criticism, and officers like even less to give the constructive criticism for fear of running off the guild member.
Recently, I've had to talk to two different healers to try to help them out with their healing, one was a holy priest, the other a restoration shaman. Now, I have some pretty hefty experience with both classes as healers (I have two max level priests, and a max level shaman, and I've healed in raids on all of them), so I find myself at least somewhat knowledgeable about the classes, but by no means do I consider myself an expert. I'll leave that to Elitist Jerks. At any rate, the two healers, after speaking with them separately in tells, I found that the priest was more willing to work with the suggestions I'd made, and there was a huge improvement the following night in our raid. The shaman, however, was very adverse to my suggestions. Here's where the meat of the problem comes in.
I am by nature a blunt type of person. However, I also am looked at by a lot of people as being very reasonable (which is was got me into the officer position to begin with). The problem is that when it comes to having to give out advice of this nature, I don't know how to do it without sounding too brash. I practically begged the shaman to give me some sort of feedback, or ask any questions, and got no response. Then, without a word, he /gquit the next day without talking to any officers. To further the problem, he's told different people different things (what he's told our officers is consistent, but what he told another guildmate is totally a separate deal). What concerns me is that when he spoke to one of our other non-officer guildmates, he mentioned that it was due to criticism of his healing. I can't really give actual chat logs, but I am wondering if this might possibly be a way that I put it to him (in which case, how do I fix this?), or more likely, is it just that the shaman needs to get a thicker skin?
Thanks,
Confused Healing Officer
CHO, as you are most likely already aware, there is a huge difference between solicited advice and unsolicited advice. Solicited advice is often a walk in the park. The player is, by default, already willing to hear you out and interested in improving his game. All you have to do is avoid going out of your way to insult that player and you can have a productive conversation.
Unsolicited advice, on the other hand, is incredibly difficult to deliver well. That's what you were trying to do with these players. Much depends on the attitude of the person receiving it, and sometimes a poor reaction simply can't be helped no matter how reasonably you deliver the advice. That may have been the case with your resto shaman. Without knowing what was said, I can't really make a judgment. However, another player responded to you with the complete opposite reaction. That fact leads me to believe that the issue is with them and not you. Still, it's possible you could improve your delivery.
An example
Let's look at an example from my own guild. I have a rogue in my guild who has since stopped playing WoW. He was not an officer, but he was one of the most skilled players that we had. As such, he consistently topped the charts, rarely made mistakes and was a key player in many guild-first boss kills. His problem, when trying to help other players in the guild to play better, is that he often chose his words and timing poorly.
He would often begin by asking someone why they were doing one thing instead of another. His intent was to get them to question the reasons behind a decision that they may not have thought about before, but this tactic immediately put them on the defensive. Then when he suggested that they do something his way instead, it made them feel like he was tricking them into giving the wrong answer so he could tell them they were doing it wrong. Even worse, he'd often do this between boss attempts when people weren't ready for it and there was no time for a conversation.
Some people could handle it; they respected his skill and were willing to listen in order to perform better. Others would become irate. On one occasion, another rogue in the guild whispered me, "Tell [that player] that I know how to play my class." This other rogue consistently performed less well and probably could have benefited from his fellow rogue's advice, but he was not willing to accept it as it was given. Instead, he took offense because of the delivery.
The chart-topping rogue also became frustrated. He had spent hours researching the best ways to maximize his damage, and in his mind, he was just trying to share the fruit of that research with other players in the guild. "Why," he asked me, "does everyone get mad when I try to help them?" The answer I gave him was this: "You have to think more about how you deliver the message, so you don't come across as pompous or condescending. You also have to plan your timing carefully, to extend the advice at a moment when the person is better able to absorb it."
I'll get into these topics next week. The first thing you should do is think about your guild's criticism culture.
Criticism culture
Every guild has its own "criticism culture." By that I mean how often player performances are evaluated and discussed -- and thus how prepared a player might be to have such a conversation.
If you play in a guild that doesn't emphasize progression, then criticism may be quite rare. It's even possible that players you're approaching have never really thought about performance issues before. Questioning their skill level or their techniques can broadside them, immediately making them uncomfortable with the topic. That, in turn, increases the chances that they'll become angry, fearful or upset. In this type of criticism culture, you often won't get very far with the direct approach.
In this setting, it's best to spend time easing a player into the idea of researching performance-related topics. Mention to him some resources that have helped you. Sometimes all you need to do is to point him in the right direction to find the information that can help. Then see if he obtains the information on his own and begins to improve that way.
If you play in a progression guild, on the other hand, it's likely that criticism happens quite frequently. The problem in this culture occurs when a player thinks he already knows all the answers and that you couldn't possibly tell him anything he doesn't already know. This attitude presents its own difficulties. In this case, you should initially approach the conversation as a discussion between equals, not as you telling him "how to play." Explain to him that you've discovered some helpful tips. Give the source and talk about how taking these steps has helped you to play better. Don't even go so far as to suggest this other player do the same thing; it's already implied. The person may respond with, "I think my way is better regardless." That's often the first instinct. Later on, he may notice you topping the meters or see you survive a particularly tough boss phase, and he may decide to do some research of his own to see if you were right.
I call these two techniques "planting the seed." Your goal at this stage is to avoid ruffling feathers but also to get the person at least thinking about what he could do to improve. Most players fall somewhere between these two extremes (clueless and know-it-all). You'll have to judge which approach is best as a starting point, if you have reason to believe that a direct critique will be poorly received.
Very often, systematic problems in a player's game can't be "fixed" in a single conversation. For this week, I've laid out the first two steps in my constructive criticism strategy:
- Consider your guild's criticism culture and adapt your approach accordingly.
- Plant the seed of taking personal initiative to research and improve play.
/salute
Read: Destructive criticism, part 2
Filed under: Officers' Quarters (Guild Leadership)
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Reader Comments (Page 4 of 4)
thpthpthp Jul 20th 2010 4:51AM
This is some really great advice, and I will definitely try in next time I'm in one of these situations. Although your example could be better, I'm really glad you posted this tip for class leaders like myself! =D
zk Jul 20th 2010 6:00AM
well given how easy ICC is (even more so with the buff) and how easy it is to get information on your class... the way i see it: if someone is pulling less than optimal DPS they know it. everyone and their mother has recount/skada if the person actually cares about raiding they will go to a guildy with knowledge on the subject and get advice. if someone isnt willing to ask even though they know they are preventing progression they really have no business raiding (unless you are in an epicly casual 3/12 normal guild in which case it doesnt matter).
obarthelemy Jul 20th 2010 7:56AM
I've been class lead on and off since the beginning of Wow, almost. My rules are:
1- You can't force a mule to eat. Some people just don't want to bother learning their class. If that's a problem for your guild, they're probably not in the right guild.
2- Lead by example. People in a guild are usually similarly geared. If I rock the meters, I have legitimacy to try and coach others.
3- Make things as easy to understand, learn and do as possible. I'm still amazed at the numbers of guildmates who never visit the guild websites, but still, I put there guides or cheat sheets, usually a translated digest of stuff on elitist jerks, trying to keep it simple, self-contained (specs, rotations, macros, gear choices/enchants/gems/food), and legible (pictures, including fun ones). There's posts to provide bog-standard advice, and other, different posts, to wonder about theorycrafting.
4- Use a carrot and a stick: be patient with newbies, point them to the relevant class info, but also be very clear that they need to shape up, or they will be shipped out.
5- give feedback, both positive and negative. Don't be the guy who's always griping, compliment a lot, too.
6- PUGs are a lost cause. During a raid is probably a bad time, except for planting seeds.
Bobfish Jul 20th 2010 8:12AM
Interesting topic for sure, In my five years I've had numerous experiences of this sort of situation.
In my opinion I think a lot of newer players who joined with Wrath simply aren't used or don't expect to have to learn how to play well in a raid environment. They've gone through 80 levels doing whatever they thought was fun and now... 'some other jerk is telling me how to play? Screw you, I just wanna come on and get some stuffs and go back to my life' :P As a guild leader I encountered that quite a bit with some players, or the knee jerk outrage at what was expected of them in a raid environment. Back in vanilla when I started raiding you had to really know everything about your class and be an expert, know which professions for consumables, and so on. Much like the other article on here (40 hour week one), that was way too much commitment and I'm glad the game has changed from that.
These days I think it can be more a case of 'coaching' some people the right way. I've found that when I direct some players to elitest jerks and so on their enjoyment of the game increases ten fold. Because it's empowering to them, their in control now and feel they have the knowledge to do their job better. Saying that there are some who just won't listen and if their that stubborn then their not worth having in your guild.
The two modes of criticism you were talking about was interesting because I have found sometimes there not mutually exclusive :P For instance I was in a raiding guild were certain dpsers, (and one healer I might add) with over 5.2k GS were pulling very average numbers or just not understanding a particular encounter like Rotface 25man. However none of these people were ever called out about it or encouraged to improve because of their 'status' within the guild, (For instance one of them was the MT girlfriend, the other a long standing officer etc,etc). The situation went on for three months, yes three months on Rotface because those people weren't , 'allowed' to be critised no matter what the approach was. Before you ask this was a progression guild that had ambitions of being top 5 on the server lol.
So I personally don't think both modes are always exclusive and if your in that situation then progress wise your stuffed :P. I think the op really was right to try to talk to him if that's he's job and it's hurting progress. If he can't take any critique and blows up like that he probably isn't worth having around :P
Rw Jul 20th 2010 9:58AM
There are people who are content with mediocrity. They play as a mean of socializing and are happy being carried. There is very little you can do to help these people and your best bet may be to help them move to a new guild. I do not believe this applies to most players, even some currently mediocre players, where a push in the right direction can gain your guild a new star. First you need to decide for yourself which category they fall into.
Just telling some one they are screwing up and this is what you need to do to fix it is easy. In the middle of a raid the only option your only option to bring down a boss. Long term though you run the risk of alienating the folks you are trying to help.
I have two suggestions.
The best way I've found to offer advice is to ask for advice. This starts the coversation on a level of mutual respect. No matter how effective of a player you are or how good your numbers we all have room for growth. Find one of your weaknesses and use that as an opening point in the conversation. Guide the conversation from there to the real subject. In this way you can bring in recommended resourses and blogs you can compare and discuss specs or take the conversation where ever it needs to go.
Another good way to offer advice is to excitely tell everyone in guild chat about this new tip you've recently discovered and "you guys really need to check this out". Move it to whisper with your "target" and go over some of the details and how it's going to help you be better,
Both suggestions start out with the same concept. I am a player just like you, no matter how good I am I have room to grow. We can grow together.
biglou Jul 20th 2010 10:04AM
My 2 cents worth.....I am a healer....I only play healers (cept for 1 hunter).....Ive played healers for 4+ years....I level generally strictly as a healer (through BG's and dungeons) unless im bored and want to grind Ill respec to DPS or something. I have taken much criticism on my main....80 Pally..... because I stacked mana gems and now I can heal forever while the other healers are pot'ing or begging the druids for mana.......but yet I still get crap for stacking those gems even though I am generally on top of HPS and total healing. This weekend I was informed (on my lvl 24 Holy Pally) in an AB that I was stupid to be specced as a healer at my level and I should /wrists (we won...I was the only healer, I hit lvl 31 last night).
Point is....as a healer...it always seems to be the healers fault even when the tank dies because he is pulling more than he can handle. Its always the healers fault when the DPS dies from pulling crap he cant handle. Its always the healers fault when the DPS gets stomped by Keristrasza because they dont know to move after they take a shot (happened this weekend). So when you criticize a healer he just may be at the end of that proverbial rope of criticism because more often than not we have heard it...we know we suck...we know we should reroll...we cant count the /facepalms.....and so forth...blah blah etc etc.
Im sorry the healer didnt work out for this group...sh&t happens. HOWEVER, a light approach to telling someone how to play a game they pay for to play and who has probably been way overly and sometimes unjustly criticized for is probably a good idea. Please refer to an awesome article by Bavid Bowers...On Battleground Belittlers...91/4/08) for reference on some of the crap we take as healers.
Lert the flaming begin.....
Brad Jul 20th 2010 12:00PM
From my experience, advice comes across much better if you do it on a toon that is the same class as you're criticizing. My main is a mage, but I also have three other 80s (none are dps) that I encounter other mages on more often. I've tried giving advice to mages while on these toons (mainly my resto shaman) and generally get poor responses. However if someone sees me on my mage and knows that I am in fact pulling more dps than they are, then they are generally more receptive and try to improve. That may have been a reason that the priest was more receptive to your criticism.
yarf Jul 21st 2010 5:13PM
this is perhaps the best OQ I've seen in a long time.
Back in my first guild there was a rogue who tried to tell me how to be a shadow priest. Now, I know I wasn't the best. I knew it then. I knew a lot about the class, but I knew I needed improvement.
However, his approach was to tell me "you're specc'd all wrong. You shouldn't have this, you shouldn't have that, you shouldn't have this. Where'd you get your spec anyway, google?"
Or things like: "Why do you cast that before this? Are you stupid?" Yes, he used insults. This guy's whole delivery put me off and he would go so far as to, after I told him to leave me alone, I didn't want his help, say "Yeah, give the fail priest loot over someone who's actually worth something to the raid."
All in all, a lot of his advise I have since taken to heart and improved substantially, but the delivery was all it took to make me really not like him. At all. And to think, had he been more tactful with his approach, it wouldn't have gotten as bad as it did. There was tension felt in raids when we were in the same raid... because he'd be baiting me on vent, trying to get me to make an outburst. Sadly for him, I was used to being a verbal punching bag at work so I know how to ignore things...
Mezza89 Aug 6th 2010 12:10AM
Old post but just reading for some research on some guild guides I'm looking at.
I don't like the whole planting the seed approach. I think it's far too passive to be effective in most cases.
I think Direct is ALWAYS the way to go but I agree that delivery is vital even down to minute details like tone of voice on vent (and I think these discussions are best on vent). I think one of the key things here is to ensure that you have some sort of rapport with the person (and imho Officers should allocate time to communicating with guild members to build this rapport) and just be direct and ask.
I play a Hunter. When we have underperforming Hunters I'd approach the issue with something like "Hey mate, I was taking a bit of a look at some raid parses and your spec and I have some suggestions for you if you'd like, on how to get your numbers up?".
It fully gives them the option to say "NO." but honestly, who's going to say "No I'd rather not improve thanks". It piques their curiosity and if they say "Oh ok what have you got?" then you've got the invite to proceed.
The same technique works with other classes "Hey mate, the other officers and myself were looking at some raid parses and has some suggestions to give you a hand with your Heals/DPS/Threat Gen/Add Control/Whatever if you're interested?"
The Passive "Plant the seed" approach runs the risk and often leads to the other player going "I dont need to research cause I'm doing great". That's my gut on it anyways.