That is not as much of an option for transgendered people. Closeted gay people can just keep a low profile, transgendered people are forced to essentially roleplay something they're not comfortable being even in real life. The only way to keep it to oneself for any extended period is to never get ventrilo/voicechat, which isn't an option if you're interested in raiding.

That is but one of many schools of thought. It's valid, if it's your style. But for me, for instance, my social life revolves around hanging out with coworkers and playing WoW with my guild (and my wife). Everyone needs people they can be open an honest with. For me, that is my WoW crew, because being that open and honest with my coworkers could lead to some awkward situations. Plus, my guildmates have a lot in common: adults, jobs, having kids, etc, so there's a lot of understanding.

"The only way to keep it to oneself for any extended period is to never get ventrilo/voicechat, which isn't an option if you're interested in raiding."

Huh? talk in the voice you use in real life. No one sees you EVER. There is no web cam. This is just more blame game crap.

For the most part, yes, but with vent around, it can lead to situations where it comes up for the transgendered. You can USUALLY tell whether a voice is biologically male or female (obviously there are exceptions) and this will lead to people calling the transgender by the wrong gender pronouns. This can be offensive to some. How would you like it if everyone you raided with called you "she" consistently (assuming you are a male)? So they correct those with them, and usually this will have to come with an explanation of "I'm transgender" when people inevitably ask why they sound like the other gender.

This, so much this.

The WHOLE POINT of playing a fantasy based MMO is to get away from real life and the problems thereof for a few hours. There's no need to bring baggage into that. No one in video-game-land needs to know the personal intimate details of your life -- who you sleep with, your race, your gender, your politics your religion -- these things have nothing to do with whether or not you can play your class and stay out of the fire.

If you're a competent raider, any good raid guild will consider that and only that when you apply. If you find that the raid guild you're with allows language you find offensive, then leave. There's plenty that have strict policies on that sort of thing.

Let me guess? You're male and straight, so you really don't have to deal with these issues. There's tons of reasons for gender or sexuality issues to be brought up, and most of them have nothing to do with people oversharing online. A lot of women pretend to be guys in game to avoid unwanted attention. A lot of gay people pretend to be straight, or at least, don't mention it, but it comes out.

Personally, I play with my partner nearly 100% of the time I'm online. We don't feel the need to discuss it either, but because we always play together, people have asked, and we've answered honestly. We roll our eyes and ignore the trolls calling people fags or faggots in trade or guild chat, but it's hard. Little kids are the most homophobic demographic, and WoW is full of them.

You don't "need" to talk in vent for raiding. you can use raid chat if there are ever any problems.

Excuse my ignorance, but I fail to see how that would not solve all problems (except the cat is out of the bag" already).
-Roleplay/play whichever gender character you wish.
-Be able to raid
-Keep your personal life personal
-Not incite any feelings of other players by automatically bringing up an inherent contentious subject that taunts "real life" political, religious and medical beliefs into the open

I've been raiding since vanilla without talking on VT, I always say my mic is broken. As long as you can listen there's never usually a problem.

This is valid...for you. However, for a transgender these issues are somewhat inevitable on vent--which in itself is inevitable for someone interested in raiding. As pointed out, when you sound masculine due to being biologically male, but you identify your gender as female, it quickly becomes apparent that something different is going on when Tina identifies herself in a(n unavoidably) masculine voice. Also, vice versa (sex/gender-wise). So, while it is perhaps possible for our gay and lesbian friends to leave their business as their business, this is less of an option for our transgender friends.

Agreed, I tend to keep personal life out of game where possible. However I am male, sound male and prefer to live my life as a male. At least I assume I do, I haven't tried any other way.

If this weren't the case my life "choices" (I don't believe being transgender is a choice, much like sexual orientation isn't really a choice either) would be fairly apparent as soon as I used voice chat. Ofcourse if someone referred to me as "she" I'd correct them, and so would any other male (biologically or otherwise).

I applaud Gender Reroller for having the courage to be honest with themselves and with their guildies. (note the pronoun use, Gender Reroller didn't mention if they are female->male or male->female transgender) I really don't get why people have to make an issue of these types of things, does the way other people find happiness really affect others in any way?

Unless guilds ask for a minimum of personnal info to be able to apply, which they usually do, and you're really tired of having to lie or hide yourself. And then there's the "talking on Vent" thing. This is not exactly only a matter of sexual orientation.

Reroller, I wish you the best of luck, and don't let the morons get to you.
/e-hug

I can understand why some may not want to talk about real life things but in social guilds that can be a lot more difficult. Even raiding guilds will talk about non raiding stuff when not raiding.

From personal experience it can be uncomfortable to refer to your significant other as your boyfriend when you aren't sure how others will take it. Other folks talk about their SOs why shouldn't I?

I am a female in real life, and almost everyone refers to me as "he" until they know me better or hear me in vent. I don't bother to correct people unless they are a new guild mate or someone I am stuck spending a lot of time around. Is a gender pronoun that important in a pug? The people that matter know.

This is a huge privilege issue. Straight, cisgendered people would think nothing of casually mentioning that they have an opposite sex partner, while gay people have to hide or lie. Transgender people have to pretend to be the gender that they by definition do not want to be.

It's so easy for straight, cisgendered people to say "well just don't do that" when they never have to censor their own behavior to protect themselves from harassment.

This is exactly what I said too. But OFC I got "intolerant"

Alright, I've tried to say nice things about this, but this is getting a bit ridiculous here. All I've been seeing are half-boiled excuses.

I'm assuming that this person is a male that transgendered to female, and is facing trolling from trolls because this person sounds masculine. That's fine. There are workarounds.

In-game, you NEVER have to reveal your gender/identity. I've been mistaken as a girl COUNTLESS times on randoms, and that's just because I was in a good mood and wasn't trash-talking about their DPS. And even STILL I get mistaken for a female. (PMS, etc) Just GO WITH IT. I personally don't have a problem because I don't give a flying you-know-what, so if people thinks you're a dude on vent, just play along. Don't cause "unwanted" drama by saying you got a "gender re-roll". It'll just give trolls something to play with.

Does that sound like it's wrong for the transgenders? Yes. It's very unfair. But that's how the society's eyes are at the moment, and trolls tend to go to extremes with that chain of thought. However, you can't just waltz out, claim you're something the majority's still not fond of, and expect it to end well.

Extreme analogy time. Let's say you are a member of the Scarlet Crusade, and you've been a member since the beginning, so you still have some sense of logic. The people around you are kinda crazy, and hates the HELL out of the undead. Turns out, you caught the plague of undeath one day, and are slowly turning undead, but it stops after a certain point. Would it be wise, when asked by others around you, to say that "I'm half-undead right now" and cause a shitstorm, or just play along and say you're still human?

Morally wrong? Sure. I ain't gonna tell you to "suck it up, pansy" either. But now's just not the right time to expose that about yourself.

Once you've played with people for a while, they talk casually about their spouses, their girlfriends, their boyfriends, their pets, their jobs, their home, their vacation. It's your choice to join in (or not), but it's important to understand that for some people, joining in the most basic sharing means either coming out or censoring themselves.

Maybe you never move beyond listening to others on Vent. Or maybe you're exactly what people expect you to be and have never had to come out as anything else. But being relaxed, honest, and yourself means coming out eventually, if you're not what people assume (gender-normative, straight, monogamous, Christian, whatever). The other choice is to hide who you are, something some people aren't willing to do when they're playing with people they consider friends, or at least buddies.

@Schadenfreude: It's also very easy for you to assume that all straight people are carefree.

Everyone hides a part of themselves in one way or another to protect themselves from rejection and harassment. I'm not saying its right, but right now that's life.

The fact is there are just as many bigoted and close minded people as there are open minded people, and the ratio is around the same in WoW. It's your choice to publicly tell people in your guild about your personal life.

What people think of you in a videogame is the least of your worries in this world, trust me.

anonymity= internet!!!!!!! I am sorry people aren't accepting you, very not cool. There are plenty of guilds that are based on homo sexuality and the like , maybe you should look for one. As far as i understand every server has a guild oriented in this area, not just proudmoore. These guilds are usually low key and you probably won't be bothered. Good luck, don't let the haters win!