Breakfast Topic: Guilt by association
by Weston Arrowsmith 
Dec 13th 2010 at 8:00AM
I like to think that I'm a good hunter. I show up to raids on time at least 90 percent of the time, I do my best to bring my flasks and food, I keep my gear properly gemmed and enchanted, I research all encounters, and I do very respectable DPS. But despite all of this, I am not recognized by how good of a player I am. Instead, I am recognized "by association."
My best friend is a restoration druid, and he is damn good at what he does. This, of course, means that he gets invites everywhere to various guilds or raids, and I'm simply tagging along as his DPS -- the guy who gets into the guild or raid by association. It isn't all bad, of course. He and I do everything in game together, and we make a pretty good team, so if continuing to stick around with him means staying in his shadow, then that's OK with me.
Of course, the problem with being "by association" is how it is taken with others. If my best friend is promoted to an officer, he's going to share everything with me, so I am promoted. "By association." If guild leadership gets too many complaints about his behavior as an officer (which I never found out of line), it would be unfair to still have me as an officer, so I am demoted. "By association." If he leaves a guild over a dispute with guild leadership, I'm kicked out of the guild. "By association." And one time, he was kicked from a guild because he was defending me against some smack-talkers. Guess who also got kicked out? "By association."
So, fellow readers, do any of you live in the shadow of another? Or do you cast that shadow? Do you ever wish you could find a way out?
Filed under: Breakfast Topics, Guest Posts
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
Sleutel Dec 13th 2010 8:16AM
Dungeon, raid, or PvP buddies I get--some things just aren't fun unless you're doing them with the people you enjoy playing with. But *promoting* someone just because they're friends with another officer? That sounds to me like a recipe for disaster.
Rob Dec 13th 2010 8:17AM
It's really hard as dps to stand out. Since, unfortunately, you are a dime a dozen. What's worse is a tank. If you are a tank that wants to raid you are usually the GL or the guy who is older than dirt and shows up to every raid. Very hard to break in as a new tank, since if you screw up you wipe the raid. My main for all of wraith was a healer and I got to do whatever I wanted essentially. Never had much trouble finding PUGs or what not, which is good, since until the very end I was never in guild runs. My hunter was my main for BC, and I had a great very skilled guild. Unfortunately I never really shined and when it came time to part ways I don't think anyone really shed a tear.
I guess my point is that the bar is unfortunately much much higher for dps to really shine, and you just have to know that a better guy is right around the corner.
stickybones Dec 13th 2010 8:17AM
I'm used to pulling my own weight as a resto Druid. I spent a good deal of time pushing myself through guilds to achieve my own raiding credibility, and have gotten myself into world top raiding guilds (inb4 cool story bro), and I know what it's like to bring others with me and have them be my "association". Of course, as time has unfolded, and things like school and work picked up, raiding time as slowed down for my into a more casual pace, and I've followed some old school friends into their guilds and pulled into their raids etc. I don't feel bad about it though. I mean, the way I see it is, I know that I'm a good enough player to not be carried based on play, but instead on gear, and I'm there to help people theorycraft of anything when they need it. So it's rewarding in its own mentor mentor-type respect.
stickybones Dec 13th 2010 8:18AM
Pardon the spelling flukes. It's cold and I'm shaking :(
jaenicoll Dec 13th 2010 8:54AM
IMO Hunters, Death Knights, Paladins have all got an associated reputation based upon some point in the history of WoW due to a mix of the antics of either bad players or gold farmers. I have seen mistakes unfairly attributed to these classes ala "blame the hunter" and seen very capable players have to work twice as hard to prove themselves.
Also, the utility abilities that the pure dps classes bring to a raid is still nowhere near as strong as the flexibility of the hybrid classes. Sadly, Mages, Warlocks, Rogues and Hunters will remain a second tier class until this utility gap is addressed by Blizzard.
Sleutel Dec 13th 2010 8:34AM
ITT: People post comments after having only read the title.
Loradio Dec 13th 2010 9:24AM
jaenicoll, that is of couse, horse shyte. The dps classes have great utility abillities, the problem is that a good number don't use them, or use them properly.
Arrowsmith Dec 13th 2010 8:35AM
Look Mom, I'm published! :D
As an update to my little story here, my friend is in one of the top progression guilds on our server, and I'm....not. They aren't recruiting hunters, and they don't have a friend rank. We're both a little bummed about this, but I'm glad he's getting to raid with some very good people. I'm personally waiting until I hit 85 before I start looking for a raiding guild of my own to join, at least until he and I can raid together again. Wish me luck!
Colonel Kurtz Dec 13th 2010 9:22AM
If you do what you say you do, then you're a Guild Master's dream, and no "by association" exception would affect your standing in thie Guild.
Can I suggest you'e shopping for a place within an eccentric demographic, with thier own equally eccentric set of'rules?
Matt P Dec 13th 2010 9:53AM
Congrats on getting published! On an unrelated note, congrats on having one of the most awesome surnames ever.
Oni Stardust Dec 13th 2010 11:34AM
Holy crap dude, that's your real name? I just figured you were a big Aerosmith fan.
Sure beats the crap out of my last name.
Arrowsmith Dec 13th 2010 12:03PM
Well thank you for the props on my last name! But ask me if I'm related to the band and I will give you a menacing glare and say "No."
(Seriously, I've been asked that too many times before. Because yes, I am TOTALLY Steve Tyler's long-lost nephew and I can TOTALLY set you up on a date with Liv. Totally. >.< It's also fun and disturbing to think that the whole band staged an orgy and I was the result :D)
MisterRik Dec 13th 2010 12:56PM
LOL - try being a teenager in the 1980s with the surname "Osborne". I lost count of how many times I got asked, "Haw haw haw! Are you related to Ozzy?"
But seriously, if you could put in a good word with Liv, that would be awesome ;p
Sergel Dec 13th 2010 2:12PM
I really like your Avatar Arrowsmith, whatever it is.
Arrowsmith Dec 13th 2010 3:35PM
@Sergel
It's Kurt Cobain's left eye, actually. And thanks!
Sleutel Dec 13th 2010 6:31PM
@MisterRik:
I am never, ever going to let you live that down. Unless I forget about it in time to bring it up tomorrow. Which is a distinct possibility.
Ati Dec 13th 2010 8:39AM
I've had the opposite effect, actually - my fiance, who started playing after me, is often in my shadow while playing. Which is hilarious, since he's a tankadin and I'm a hunter. Most of our guilds haven't promoted him to officer just because I am an officer, though. So far they've just taken for granted that he knows what I know, and as long as he doesn't go spreading that around, that's fine. Of course, they inevitably realize that half my good ideas come from him and promote him anyways.
ElrithCC Dec 13th 2010 8:45AM
Would you really want to stay in a guild that just kicked your "team" mate in all things out?
Roguesan Dec 13th 2010 8:50AM
I have much the same relationship with a shirt, hairy dwarf ret pally. We were both picked up entirely seperately by the same guild when we first started playing some time shortly after Wrath hit. Yeah, I'm one of those.
I have no hesitation in admitting that I had no idea what I was doing back then; I was a combat Rogue quite happily wielding two fast daggers. I know, right?
Anyway, one evening whilst wondering out loud how long it would take to save up enough loose cash to buy my first epic mount, I got into a discussion with said Pally given that not many people were occupying what came to be known as the 'midnight shift'. An hour later, completely out of the blue, the required gold appeared in my inbox along with a simple message - "Go buy a mount. It's on me." Naturally, I was touched by such an unselfish and outward display of generosity from someone I had spent a grand total of about half an hour talking to.
After we started talking more, I began to get an idea for the wealth of knowledge this guy had somehow managed to amass, partly due to having an exceptional memory for facts, npc names, towns, material locations. He rocketed up to 80, while I sort of shuffled along twenty or so levels behind. When I eventually made it to the top, we began a gearing cycle of teaming up to run dungeons together, eventually progressing to the point that Heroic modes no longer held anything of interest. Deciding a purely social guild was no longer what we needed, we began to seek a raiding guild. He found our next home through an advert for a ret pala on /trade and responded, saying he was willing to join if his Rogue buddy could come as well. Already having a bit of a developing rep on the server, his offer was accepted immediately and I was dragged along. Entry by association. That was also how I got into ICC the first time; my semi-decent dps vouched for by the guy gunning 10k single target on relatively low gear.
From there the partnership was solidified and the pair of us began to develop a rep in the guild and outside of it as being a package deal. We would regularly hold contests รก la Gimli and Legolas in the LotR Trilogy during battle to see who could get the most kills and do the highest dps in a given raid, almost always fighting over the number one and number two spots on the charts. He would usually get number one and took great pleasure in asking me for recounts, knowing he had won. Through guild splits, team divisions, server changes, faction changes we have remained together and continue to do so out of a mutual respect, admiration and generally nerdy sense of humour.
Undoubtedly, despite his dwarven stature, it is he who casts the shadow in this team. That's never really bothered me though. I mean, come on. If I wasn't happy to lurk in shadows, what kind of Rogue would I be?
Corv Dec 13th 2010 10:11AM
Thsi was one of the best comments I ever read on this page, thanks :)
The last sentence rounded the whole thing up very nicely.