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1-24-2011 @ 5:22AM
As usual, great stuff Ane. Inspired me to bust this out ...SOMEWHERE IN THE COSMOS, A BRIGHT NEBULA IN THE GREAT DARK BEYONDNORGANNON: (startled) Yo, Aman'Thul, what are you doing hiding behind the supernova? I just got home!AMAN'THUL: Hiding? I wouldn't stoop to that. It's Your feng-shui! It is awful! Have you been letting chaos decorate your living room?NORGANNON: Actually, I've just been channeling my Jackson Pollack in these parsecs. But serious, I thought you might be, you know, a burglar-AMAN'THUL: What, you thought someone was going to steal the stars?NORGANNON: (embarassed a bit) Yeah, huh-huh, I was thinking yeah, someone would and then I'd have to tell some flea-sized critter I'm the King of the Universe and tell them to roll up a mountain, a dozen goats, a couple of french breads, all the cars on a third-world nation's freeways and a skyscraper into a ball and remake them. AMAN'THUL: (snorts a laugh, then shows a small device)NORGANNON: Whoa! Still rockin' the pager Aman'Thul?AMAN'THUL: Yeah. I know, I should've upgraded when we were fixing up that lovely lava world, Char. Well, yesterday, I got a page. From Azeroth.(ORCHAESTRA: BWAHHHM)NORGANNON: Reception my inception! I like that little chime! Kinda overdramatic but ...AMAN'THUL: That signal is coming from the old arcade we left on Azeroth.NORGANNON: Dude, I know we were totally lit and buzzed that I carried your undefeated record with the Vikings on the NFL Blitz machine, but I do remember shutting off the lights when we left last mega-annum ...AMAN'THUL: Did you check the power bar thingy on the seafloor?NORGANNON: Yeah, I moved it to the sea trench too, I recall we kept having accidents with that thing. You accidentally brushed the off switch once, while we were forming the murlocs, and that corrupted their speech file --AMAN'THUL: They were supposed to sing in contralto and cluck like chickens ...NORGANNON: Well, all we could get was gargling and we had to settle and move on because deadline was near. Then I recall we had that accident with Eonar, she thought she was putting her flip-flops back on when we had the computer desk over the ocean but she pulled a continental rift out between her toes ...AMAN'THUL: Yeah, she tried to cover that slip up with a jungle in the middle of a desert. A jungle in the middle of a freakin' desert!NORGANNON, Dude, she not only yanked that bad boy out, she also made those jungle mountains in ... what we call it, Feralas? Then she decided to get cute and pinched pieces of earth up and made that funky Needles place ...AMAN'THUL: Memories. Anyway, what's your thoughts? (sneering) I'm thinking somebody left the discs out ...NORGANNON: (annoyed) Well, I always put them in the titansteel covers, always do since you got on my case about that one disc getting cracked.AMAN'THUL: Do you know how hard it is to get a Yardbirds recording in stone in this part of the universe?NORGANNON: Yeah, yeah, a box of frogs, cream and renaissance can make the same sound ... listen, I got a hypothesis, hear me out, since it ain't from Ulduar, it ain't from whatshisface, Al, that starry guy that's our intern ... I think the softies we left to evolve might've finally figured out our toys.AMAN'THUL: Which ones? The vrykul were busy measuring each other with stones and swords all the time ... or were they measuring their swords and stones, I can't remember ... and the little ones with the beards only pounded the earth and drank alcohol.NORGANNON: That's one more action than the Sporelings Eonar made on that freaky nearby planet. (Vulgar hand motion) Pounding the mushroom, pounding the mushroom ...AMAN'THUL: She was obviously on mushrooms when she made those ... and stop doing that, I didn't need to know you're right-handed.NORGANNON: (smiling, flexing) Actually, ambidextrous.AMAN'THUL: (singing) Too much in-fo. Ahem. OK, we could rule those out, could rule out the trolls, as all they do is smoke and eat each other. Tauren ... they'd probably use our machines for a backscratching post. So that leaves ...NORGANNON: Sargeras? Uh-uh. Not his style. He'd be blasting the pager. He's not into the whole brevity thing. He's not clever enough to say, reincarnate himself from a pregnant master sorceress and make a whole army of darkness using portals and conspiracies. And since our boys in Ulduar didn't report anything about the parasites, that leaves only one possible suspect ...AMAN'THUL: Gnomes. I told you we should have eradicated the little vermin. They'd most likely tear up all our work while we were away. But Eonar was like "they're so cute, how could you?" Allright, I said, holding off on the gnome purge. And here we are. Getting midnight pages from that planet's version of sentient Pomeranians ...NORGANNON: Don't get me wrong, I like canines, but all those do is look cute, bark, bark, bark ... and crap all over the floor.AMAN'THUL: Precisely. I have a feeling we'll need to do some visitation and ... re-origination. Where did you put the planet restore disc?NORGANNON: Gah, always when I'm working on other systems ... I think I put them in the shoebox.AMAN'THUL: Where and which? And also ... I thought you knew everything ... NORGANNON: Please! I only advertise that. Plus you made me memorize all those stupid spells like starshards and demon sacrifice that end up on the arcane cutting floor. Anyhoo, I think Eonar did some spring cleaning in this part of the galactic arm, lemme check this closet (pokes head) nope, that's just a black hole. (opens door), hm, there's where I put that red dwarf ... oh yeah here's ... oh shi-AMAN'THUL: Her shoe closet. Brilliant. Do you know how many pairs she ...NORGANNON: I get it, I get it. Let's start looking. I need the ladder.AMAN'THUL: Stairway to heaven, coming through ...
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