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All of the latest Mists of Pandaria newsBreakfast Topic: How do you cope with muggles who don't "get" WoW?
by Aiden James Kosciesza 
Jan 27th 2011 at 8:00AM
We have a hunter in our guild whose mother does not understand World of Warcraft at all. She's the type who doesn't use computers, refused to have an internet connection in the house until this very year, and thinks that MMOs sound the death knell for her hopes of having grandchildren. My friend the hunter has painstakingly explained that raids are a group activity, that there are real people behind the colorful avatars, and that it's not polite to jump up and leave in the middle of fighting a raid boss -- to no avail. The mother still doesn't understand what could be so compelling on a computer screen that her child can't be at her beck and call.
We all know people who are not WoW players, and most of us have had the experience of trying to explain our favorite game to someone who just doesn't get it, whether that someone is a parent, a significant other, a coworker, or a friend. My own efforts have met with varying results. My family still can't quite wrap their heads around a gaming hobby, but after much persuading I was able to convince my last girlfriend to give WoW a try. She's a valued guildie to this day.
Have you ever had to explain your World of Warcraft hobby to the uninitiated? What was the hardest thing for them to understand? What kind of reaction did you get? Have you convinced any of them to try the game themselves?
Filed under: Breakfast Topics, Guest Posts
Reader Comments (Page 5 of 9)
Therar Jan 27th 2011 9:57AM
Is that what kids are calling it these days?
Haldo Jan 28th 2011 3:03AM
I completely know where you're going with that. Often, my WoW-playing sister and I will be discussing something with each other, and my non-WoW-playing sister and/or mother will be in the room with blank looks on their faces, telling us, 'I understand the words that are coming out of your mouth, but they make no sense together.'
'Turkey Blubber Canada' is our usual response.
Hello Pal Jan 27th 2011 9:07AM
I've shown my family the world (cruising round Northrend on a dragon) the sillies and some of the story line, but the best way to explain the idea was putting vent through my speakers on a Naxx run. Suddenly my Mum could see the teamwork and the fun, as people died on frogger, our male tauren put on a pink dress and danced and we called our "switches" on 4 horsemen.
Keegan Jan 27th 2011 2:28PM
Back in High School I considered doing just that to explain it to my parents.
Then a few minutes after I had that idea the raid leader let out a stream of expletives when we wiped.
I decided to just live with my parent's ignorance.
Tim Jan 27th 2011 9:07AM
I was excited about becoming an officer in a former guild. I told my family about it and about the exclusive officers chat in game. They began to make mafia type jokes about me "being in the family now". And he's in an elite exclusive club and some such garbage. I tried to explain for a few minutes and gave up and sat there as they gabbled on. To this day, they still joke about it every once in awhile. And don't get me started on my wife's comments...
Dragonrose Jan 27th 2011 9:10AM
Ugh I feel for that hunter. Quite almost exactly my situation, except my mother does use a computer for most her work, has internet access and is pretty savvy in it. Except she still expects me to "pause" the game whenever she wants me to do something for her. It's getting better though, nowadays (when she lets me have game-time... being dependent sucks) if I say I'm in a dungeon she'll usually wait a bit then start scolding me after ten minutes. Don't get me started on raids.
As for most my friends, even the ONE dude who doesn't play wow (he had a trial and he realised the game IS that good, he just doesn't have the time to dwelve deeper. He made a dorf hunter : P) is pretty cool about it when the rest of us are geeking out.
Rubitard Jan 27th 2011 9:14AM
What's to explain? The very fact that it's of importance to you should be reason enough. "I place value on this, so please respect it. You don't have to understand it, as I don't understand or have the experiences to appreciate everything you do." It's been my experience that when someone asks why I waste time on a video game, they're not actually interested in my answer. They've brought their own.
jealouspirate Jan 27th 2011 11:27AM
Really, really excellent comment Rubitard. Major thumbs up for your insight.
Prelious Jan 27th 2011 12:54PM
^ This
Moobs Jan 27th 2011 9:14AM
My wife reluctantly agreed to let me purchase WoW bacvk in the vanilla days, She did however impose a max of 15 hours per week of play time (now it is around 12H), and now almost 4 years into WoW I still have the same probelms with her when it comes to I can't just jump up and do what she asks the moment she asks.
No matter how many times I tell her there are 24 other people waiting for me to get back she does not seems to see everyone else's time as valuable.
As for my parents and hers trying to explain why I play WoW falls on deaf ears, as "video games" are for kids only adults don't waste thier time on those types of things!
carebear Jan 27th 2011 9:54AM
I can totally understand how people you've never met before could be more important than your wife. Time for a divorce?
Know Jan 28th 2011 12:58AM
@Carebear. From my understanding, a marriage is meant to be a partnership with mutual respect from both parties plus a healthy 'give and take' dynamic (16years and counting of marriage speaking). There will always be areas where a couple has to accept 'quirks' in the other for things to work. If Moobs was disrespectful to his wife's friends by interrupting while she was on the phone or chatting to them via FB, twitter et al, I'm sure she'd be upset. Why then is it OK for her to disrespect and interrupt time with his friends? Also, in this day and age of connectivity, who is technically naive to expect that friends must be 'met in person' to be friends? I'm not saying games should take precedence over a spouse or partner but if time is set aside for playing with online friends in a structured fashion such as raiding, what's the issue?
JohnnyP Jan 28th 2011 9:51AM
Dont ignore wife aggro...or someone will offtank her!
kingerz Jan 28th 2011 8:41PM
Just say, "It is more important that I look at the screen for the next 3 hours and talk with passion and emotion to these guys. This is important. This is fun. They need me. They are real people, don't you get it? There are 24 of them and just one of you! No, don't interrupt me, we will all die. I have to do this now. No, I don't care if our once-favourite show is on in 5 minutes: this is better and more important, watch it alone. No, tell my dad to call back later...at midnight when we finish. No, you can deal with the baby. Why are you being so unreasonable? You just don't understand."
They will eventually understand, alright. But meanwhile, never underestimate the power of denial.
Brent Jan 27th 2011 9:24AM
Tell Mom it's like interrupting one of Beethoven's symphonies in the middle of the third movement. The raids are highly structured creative collaborative symphonies of visual variables, also aural, and World of Warcraft will be remembered 200 years from now as fondly as the great creative opus of any master composer... Beethoven, Mozart... Perhaps Wagner is the best corollary with the visits to the Bayreuth shrine by loyal appreciators. However, in a turn of affairs made possible by the advanced in technology, World of Warcraft is created by hundreds of creative people, like the stories in Homer's Odyssey. (Homer was a group of poets and not only one). By questioning or denying her son's involvement in World of Warcraft, she is being a rube.
Roguesan Jan 27th 2011 9:25AM
I get mixed reactions. I've managed to convince a couple of my more open-minded friends into trying the game, despite their varying levels of technological understanding - my step brother took to the game instantly, while a work colleague regularly finds herself up against the wall. Literally. She got stuck there exploring a den on Teldrassil and hadn't quite got the hang of moving the camera angle yet.
My mother is politely interested and listened patiently while I gave her a rundown of the games basic concepts; levelling, dungeons, lore etc. My stepfather on the other hand dismissed the game as a 'load of nonsense' and almost laid an egg when I asked to be excused from dinner one particular evening to go raid.
Yet another friend has an ex who played WoW and commonly referred to the game as 'his mistress'. It was a substantial factor in their breakup and to this day any mention of the game will prompt a passionate "You're going to die alone!" which is ludicrous. There are over 12 million other players logging on regularly. I'm not even remotely alone... :)
So different people; different reactions. They accept it or they don't, they understand or fail to. Either way, I'm not fussed - there's a genocidal dragon on the loose that I owe an ass-whupping.
Sunhead Jan 27th 2011 9:39AM
If you can keep the voice chat clean, have him play with speakers for a bit so they can hear the rest of you. They will get the idea that he is co-ordinating with a bunch of other real people very quickly.
Have the Raid Leader or other officer address the family directly when they are in the room, speak to them like adults. It has worked for us.
PS: Keep it clean... the Mum in question makes us keep a swear jar now.
Kriegle Jan 27th 2011 3:38PM
I had a similar expeience In a guild I was in, also with a teenage hunter, incidentally. His mom had similar qualms which were quickly alleviated when our GL, who's a cop in real life and an absurdly nice guy, gave his mom a call and explained what was going on to her. When she found out that her son was an integral part of a 25 man team where he was watched over and moderated by respectful adults, she felt comfortable enough to even let him attend an out-of-state RL guild meetup.
carebear Jan 27th 2011 9:44AM
"The mother still doesn't understand what could be so compelling on a computer screen that her child can't be at her beck and call."
What's more unreasonable? Giving a video game precedence over your parents or giving your parents precedence over a video game? But I think this is why some guilds choose to have an age requirement for their members.
GerardthePriest Jan 27th 2011 9:46AM
I was always a geek and computer gamer, ever since my parents first bought a Commodore 128. I think that in junior high and high school - when I actually played a number of multiplayer games with friends via modem, or battle.net, or, eventually, a real internet connection - my parents were mostly just happy to have me in the house, not using drugs, getting good grades, and being reasonably happy.
Now that I'm an independent adult, I think most of my friends are geeky enough to understand WoW as a hobby even if they don't play it. My ex said that he didn't really understand that WoW was a real hobby until he heard me on Vent, talking with my guild about scheduling our next raid: "That won't work for me, I'm going to a wedding," "I can't log on until later than that, I'm working until 9," etc. That's when it clicked for him: these people are all real people with real lives and they play this game together.