I didn't think we would run into one another so soon, but seeing as The Queue is a daily publication, I can't say I'm surprised.

After spending what seemed like endless minutes of research using the renowned search engine, Google, I have come to the conclusion that, just as Siorra suggested, you are a Time Traveller.

Apparently, that involves being able to "traverse" the expanse of "time" in what one could call a fancy, far-too-gilded and overly-complicated machine. My thoughts first arrived on a gold-plated slot machine/Maytag clothes dryer hybrid, with a penny-farthing seat haphazardly duct-taped to the lint compartment. But no, you're obviously far too cunning for such a design...

As you surely can tell, this one-sided banter with you has blossomed into my lone source of joy in the cold December of my days. Yes, that may be pitiful and slightly disturbing. Does it render my efforts for naught? Slightly, but not by nearly enough. Thus, I trudge onward in hopes that my quest shall lead me to victory. One day, sir, one day.