All the World's a Stage: Gender and roleplaying
Ridiculousness of the above video aside, there have been countless jokes about women in WoW; the G.I.R.L. (Guy In Real Life) acronym has been present since vanilla. Regardless of what the perception of others may be, there are a lot of roleplayers out there who like to roleplay the opposite gender. And why not? It's a change of scenery. It's a different mindset entirely, and honestly, men and women both have been doing this since the early days of tabletop roleplaying.
As with any aspect of roleplay, there are pitfalls to be found -- and none quite so convoluted as the issue of gender in roleplay. Whether for you, yourself, or the roleplayers around you, the subject of real-life gender vs. character gender is a touchy one for both men and women alike. Today, we're going to take a look at the importance of gender and how it applies to roleplaying.

A lot of people place a lot of importance on gender, whether it is a wish to see a role model, a "strong female character," a "caring male figure," or anything in between. I don't deny the importance of gender to others, but in the case of character development, who your character is and what he do should take precedence over what gender he happens to be. Many times, writers will attempt that strong female or that caring male yet actually come across with something completely ludicrous that doesn't even resemble what they were originally trying to accomplish.
We see this in television, movies and game development as well; writers and developers who focus on creating a strong female end up creating a mockery of what a female ought to be. Personally, I think it has a lot to do with the perceived importance of gender in character development. The more "important" gender is made out to be, the more it seems to come across as sexism. Whether it's a distinct lack of female role models in a game or a stereotype of brutal barbarians, it pops up all over the place in fiction, in movies, and in WoW.
Does this mean that gender is unimportant? Absolutely not. There is much to be said about the importance of having a positive male or female role model to identify with in real life and in fiction. However, creating that role model is something that a lot of people find difficult to do, particularly if there's a difference between your gender and the gender of the character you are writing or playing.
Part of the difficulty lies in the hands of those who make gender important. The importance of gender in society and in the entertainment industry can place so much pressure on the writer or the developer that they screw it up because they are trying so hard not to screw it up. They put in so many elements that are designed to make that character strong and likeable that it comes across as fake and contrived. So what's a writer or an aspiring roleplayer to do?

One of the struggles many roleplayers have in regards to gender is how, exactly, to make that character seem "real." Sometimes a roleplayer will jump into a role that is so stereotypically "male" or "female" that the character comes across as a robotic, unrealistic version of what a man or a woman should be. It's a bit like the "uncanny valley" effect, an expression used in robotics. In the "uncanny valley," the more a robot acts and looks like a human, the less it appeals to those who interact with it.
We talked last week about the pitfalls of locking yourself into one particular goal or achievement that your character wants to accomplish; the same applies to gender with regard to character development. Just like a character who has only one task in life, getting too obsessed with character gender and how that affects how your character thinks, speaks, acts -- that can lock you up as quickly as a single goal with a defined end.
While an aspiring roleplayer can look at study after study about the differences in male and female psychology and try to draw examples of how his character should act, I don't really recommend this approach. The gender of your character shouldn't really be a huge issue when you're looking at character development. The point of roleplaying is to create a character and place yourself in the shoes of that character; the subject of gender should be secondary.
What does that mean, exactly? It means that gender shouldn't be the important portion of your roleplay, and it shouldn't be what defines your character. The more emphasis you place on gender, the less you place on actual character development. What roleplayers should focus on is creating an engaging character with a realistic background, one who is likeable and that they would enjoy playing.
It seems backwards, but it's not. The second you get wrapped up in gender is the moment you will run into some sort of stereotype, whether it's giggling girl or hulking he-man. The more you worry about gender, the more you focus on making that gender feel "real" and the less it actually comes across. So focus on what it is that makes your character tick. Give him or her an engaging background, and then work out the smaller details like gender. The less emphasis placed on gender, the more you can put on important things like why he's running around Azeroth, who his friends are, what his motivation is, and what he hopes to accomplish with his life.

The other issue roleplayers have in regards to gender is how to react to the sudden revelation that the woman they've been roleplaying with is in reality, a man behind the screen (or vice versa). While some people don't really care one way or another who the person is behind the screen, others are shocked and even sometimes offended when they find out their burly, sword-swinging warrior pal is actually a woman.
There is a distinct line between what happens in character and what happens out of character -- and there is a distinct line between who your character is and who you are. Your character may be a brilliant historian, while in real life, you couldn't care less about world history; your character could be a woman, and you could be a man. This is a line that should be clearly defined. It's when that line is crossed that people get upset.
There's no real way to tell when people cross that line between in-character and out-of-character interactions. It happens, though, particularly with character romances. Some roleplayers automatically turn those roleplayed feelings of romance into out-of-character crushes. If you notice this is happening to you, that's the moment you need to step back and examine those feelings and make sure you aren't getting too wrapped up in the roleplay and confusing fiction with real life.
The same applies to your friends. If you notice your roleplay partner seems to be getting a little too involved OOC with what's going on IC, you should halt the roleplay and have a talk with him about what's going on and whether he's getting too involved. This is the kind of situation that really needs to be handled delicately, because discussions involving feelings can sometimes lead to hurt feelings -- and that's the last thing anyone wants to happen.
When a player gets upset about a difference between the in-character and out-of-character gender of another roleplayer, it often means he's blurring that line. If you find yourself offended or the subject of another player's offense, it's worth it to sit down and discuss why that offense is there, what it means, and whether or not the roleplay can be salvaged. If it can, great; if feelings are too heated over the issue, it may be time to call a halt and move on.

Whether in real life or in roleplay, what really matters in the long run isn't what parts you or your character happened to be born with; it's who he or she is as a person. When trying to establish realism within the Warcraft universe, the motivations, goals, background and memories your character holds are far more important than what gender he happens to be. Develop the person. Develop the story. Don't stress over the gender. Everything else should fall into line gracefully.
Filed under: All the World's a Stage (Roleplaying)






Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
Chmee Mar 6th 2011 6:02PM
I don't think "anachronism" means what you think it means.
Ghilloa Mar 6th 2011 6:07PM
I think you meant acronym
Sukugaru Mar 6th 2011 6:26PM
A friend once said it really succinctly:
"Play the *person* first, then worry about the gender."
(Paraphrased a bit because I don't remember the exact quote.)
Dascylus Mar 6th 2011 6:28PM
I think the whole gender issue came up with males trying to start ERP as female toons...
Aruhgulah Mar 6th 2011 6:49PM
...and failing miserably.
Drakkenfyre Mar 6th 2011 10:36PM
Unless you want to be subject to terrible imagery, don't.
Marcosius Mar 7th 2011 7:23AM
Terrible? Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Drakkenfyre....
Garnlok Mar 6th 2011 6:40PM
I'm a guy who always plays guys when given the choice for simplicity and to prevent confusion. I have considered playing a female charecter before, and have done so many a time when certain classes are always a certain sex and I wanted to play them, but when given the choice I just role male. The confusion and potintial social problems it could cause aren't worth the minor interest of playing what amounts to a different skin model (I ignore all sterotypes as pointless blather as a rule), but don't care if other people don't share my opinion and roll the oposite sex. If you enjoy the game more by playing a lady, then whatever floats your boat, lets get back to having fun in game instead of worrying about how your pixels are arranged differently then RL you is.
restodr00d Mar 6th 2011 6:43PM
hahaha I loved the video xD
Nice Article... as always =)
Sarah Bee Mar 6th 2011 7:06PM
I only play as male draenei ... AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT.
Martinel Mar 6th 2011 7:27PM
I can listen to 'Exodar Disco' looped over and over until those waving tentacles become attractive.
razion Mar 6th 2011 7:13PM
I'll say this: If you restrict yourself to role-playing one gender, you are effectively destroying your ability to be able to understand that other gender better. After all, what better way to understand how other people think than living a day in their shoes?
The drama element will be there, to a minor extent, but only if the individual isn't upfront about these sorts of things in the beginning. Trust is important for relationships--online or not, and your ability to make a good friendship with another person starts with letting them know these sorts of things when the time is appropriate (that is, sooner rather than three years down the road). If you are upfront and honest from the get-go, any drama is thereafter the other person's personal beef, and you can be confident that you've done your part to try and avoid such a conflict later on down the road. Also, by doing this sooner, you can know what sort of relationship with the other person you're getting into (how well's he/she taking it? Not so well. Well, I just learned something about this individual).
On a final note, I'll say that for most people role-playing the opposite gender can be very hard--it's difficult to get in the head of someone you aren't, and being able to channel those thoughts and feelings is probably the realm for role-players who are serious about understanding the craft, and so on. I wouldn't recommend it to someone who is just starting out role-playing, but it certainly is educational in its own merit, and would hope no one turn down the opportunity because it may be intimidating.
Xantenise Mar 6th 2011 7:33PM
"After all, what better way to understand how other people think than living a day in their shoes?"
I have to agree with this. In spite of not being straight, I thought homophobia was something rare that was dying out these days (having the belief that it was just a very, very vocal minority, and being a very sheltered person) until I RPed an out-of-the-closet gay man. The amount of bigotry, both IC and OOC, I was on the end of was humbling, educational, and made my faith in humanity plummet. I can rarely ever RP him with his husband in public without seeing it. If we're lucky it's just a, "lol gay" or "r u gay?", if we're unlucky we get griefed to kingdom come.
zvermm Mar 7th 2011 12:15AM
Seriously, in WoW? You expected to find adult and intelligent people in WoW? I just hope you never travel in Iran, for your own good.
It's not as bad as I make it out to be actually, but it's the rotten apples that you always hear. The 'normal' people are invisible.
ShadowPriest Mar 7th 2011 12:18AM
@ Xantenise
Im going to try and tread very carefully here.... Let me set up a frame of understanding before I continue. Being gay isn't a choice, your born that way, but........... It isn't "normal".
People in general have a fairly set understanding as to what is "normal", to make a long story short, being gay in almost and culture/society/religion that i can think of isn't very "normal".
People react to the abnormal differently, fear, anger, confusion, a gamete of emotions to cope that which isn't "normal"
I mean hell look at the WoW census sometimes, the 2 most commonly played races are blood elves and humans, the 2 most "normal" looking races in all of the game. As you expand, usually to more abnormal the race is, the least played it is. Even as a side note i honestly think and it is my own opinion, most female characters (draenei & Trolls) the females look more "normal then their male counterparts"
So considering that there's bigotry against fictional races, what honestly made you think RPing a gay character especially in such a wide demographic as WoW would go over well? I mean sure people are more tolerant then they were even 10 years ago, but to be frank homophobia is still alive and well in the world, including the world of warcraft, and to think otherwise is pretty cavalier of you.
ashkaryo Mar 7th 2011 1:15AM
@ShadowPriest
"People in general have a fairly set understanding as to what is "normal", to make a long story short, being gay in almost and culture/society/religion that i can think of isn't very "normal"."
This is why people should join Budda or (in my case) the old pagan faiths/Wicca. We accept anyone, doesn't matter what your preference or who you roll play :)
Xantenise Mar 7th 2011 2:11AM
@Shadowpriest It's perfectly normal. What I think you mean is that society assumes that everyone is straight - there is a *difference*. Being gay, in itself, is not unusual.
"to be frank homophobia is still alive and well in the world, including the world of warcraft, and to think otherwise is pretty cavalier of you."
... You did read the part where I said I was proved wrong, right?
Tokkar Mar 7th 2011 2:33AM
@ShadowPriest
"It isn't 'normal'."
It isn't PREDOMINANT. There - fixed it.
Accipeter Mar 7th 2011 7:21AM
Homosexuality is much like left-handedness, from all I have read and understood about it. That is to say, a minority of people are left-handed, and it is therefore certainly not the norm, but it is well within the range of normal and expected human variation, found consistently and in consistent percentages across all known human populations.
My understanding is that there seems to be a genetic component to homosexuality, and there is evidence that those genes may well confer other evolutionary advantages to those who carry them. For instance, there is evidence that women with one or more gay sons also tend to be more fertile overall, which would definitely contribute to evolutionary success. I would be very careful before assuming that any given human variant is necessarily undesirable or disadvantageous, when looking at the overall picture.
Also, I think people need to use the word "normal" with a great deal more care than they do.
roseclown Mar 9th 2011 1:07AM
@ShadowPriest
I've seen normal, it ain't pretty.
Also: Very few people are completely "normal". I myself am a straight, middle-income woman who is a christian, and yet my personality on Myers Briggs is 1% of the total population and I struggle with "non-normal" problems like depression and aspergers to boot!
Also, just because something isn't in a majority doesn't mean it isn't normal. Like I am fairly certain to be something other than white in America would still be considered normal, just less predominant.
And we should hope that people get their butts in gear and stop discriminating against others just because the person is different from them.
@Ashkaryo
...Uhm, you do realize that Buddhism is split on the topic of homosexuality (depending on region) as well, right? And the current Dalai Lama would disagree with you.
Religion is often interpreted by culture, that's the way it goes.
Not to mention when we talk about all the different groups.. heck, even certain groups among Wiccan practitioners are anti-homosexual.
Basically just bringing this up because the flippant response annoyed me in the assumptions it made (and the mass generalization of entire religions...). Whole branches of religions are hardly ever that black or white, and vary wildly by region.
The more you know~