WoW Rookie: Being polite in game

It might seem like an odd notion, but not everyone understands what's polite in the World of Warcraft. This isn't because they are rude in real life or necessarily lack the social skills to properly order a cup of coffee. (I'll admit, though, after a few battlegrounds and seeing the behavior in BG chat, I wonder about that.)
The most common reasons folks are inadvertently rude in game is because they're new to our subculture. They haven't been inculcated to the subtle niceties that come with pretending to be elves and trolls. Especially if this is their first MMORPG, they might only be dimly aware that other characters are also players and that any amount of human interaction might be expected.
The goal here isn't to lay down some kind of draconian law of behavior. It's just an attempt to talk about being polite.
Say hello
When players encounter one another in the wild while questing in the open world, it's a nice touch to take the time and say hello. It's not a big deal, and only rarely will folks castigate one another for not giving a polite greeting -- but it's still a nice touch.
Even more importantly, if you join a dungeon group, raid, or battleground, definitely take the time to say hi to your group. There is very little more irksome than going through the queue and grouping up with four other people, only to be greeted with stony silence. It makes you feel like you just farted in the choir pew. A simple "howdy!" can make the experience much more relaxed.
Share mobs

This is a much bigger deal when you're questing in the wild. As you kill mobs toward your kill count or for a necessary quest item, you often encounter other players who are working on the same quest. It can become obvious very quickly that both you and the other player are using the same resource.
You have a couple of options here. You can say hello and then offer to share the mobs without grouping. That gets a little complex, though, because it's hard to effectively rotate who's killing which mobs.
The better choice is to offer to group up with the other player. The game has built-in systems that give you both credit for kills and allow you to rotate who gets the important quest drops. It only takes a few moments to ask and start the group, and it's usually the polite thing to do.
Roll need, but offer to share
Most heroic dungeons are fairly quick and effective. It doesn't take long to get a basic set of gear. But the accepted rule of thumb is that you should only roll need on the gear that's appropriate to role you used to join the dungeon. For example, if you're in a dungeon as a healer, you shouldn't assume you can roll need on the DPS gear.
That doesn't mean you can't possibly win it, though. Simply ask the group if it's okay to roll for off-spec gear. Heroic gear is awesome, but it's not the bleeding edge of content. Many players have moved beyond needing it, and they'll usually be just fine with your rolling.
The important part is that you need to ask first and not make the assumption.
Don't make assumptions
If you've not picked up on the pattern, the important factor in all of these guidelines is to avoid making assumptions. Take the time to talk to your groupmates, acquaintances, and other people. A few seconds of conversation can go a very long way to avoiding trouble and being more polite.
Read more about WoW's social conventions and netiquette in the WoW Rookie Guide, and get help unravelling the most knotty situations with advice from WoW Insiders Drama Mamas.
Filed under: WoW Rookie






Reader Comments (Page 1 of 5)
Blayne Mar 24th 2011 3:05PM
I have found while skinning in tol barad that people are not polite at all. They steal the skins from the mob you just killed no matter if they know you are a skinner or not. They camp you and even if you tell them you are a skinner they say that they don't care... WoWs player base has been incredibly altered since vanilla to the point that simple courtesy does not matter to most players.
Aruhgulah Mar 24th 2011 3:10PM
One effective way to stop them: don't loot the mobs until you're ready to skin them yourself.
Blayne Mar 24th 2011 3:16PM
I do exactly that but it doesn't help when they are waiting around like vultures. Its entirely pathetic that people don't do their own work anymore.
Necromann Mar 24th 2011 3:17PM
I don't have any lvl 85 skinners, but my fried who skins hates worgen with a passion. He has stopped looting the mob trash if there is a worgen skinning in the area.
Ice Mar 24th 2011 3:28PM
@Aruhgulah
Wish there was button to prevent in advance to stop people whispering un-civilised threats thro whispers that easily (ignore button ftw and all that though).
If you dont loot them you get
"Mrrh loot the mobs you ¤%&%# you".
Skinning is serious business. Even more than mining and herbing I've noticed.
I'm personally very trigger happy to report them to GM's nowdays. I just cant stand looking people like that in mah hood.
Aaron Mar 24th 2011 3:55PM
I had a guy saying LOOOOOT! to which I replied KILLLLL!!! He nerd raged, earned a place on my ignore list and eventually logged off. =/
Sir Broose Mar 24th 2011 3:59PM
While I do NOT condone the behavior described in these anecdotes, I can speak to skinning being tough in Cata. My miner and my herbalist get all the resources they can possibly carry just by flying the right circuit for half an hour. Skinning has been quite a bit harder for my druid, this expansion. There just don't seem to be a lot of skinnable mobs that need to be killed in the regular course of play. And even if you are looking to do nothing but skin and kill, it is really tough to find a good spot for that. I think that's why competition in Tol Barad gets so heated. It is one of the few spots where there is a steady stream of skinnable corpses. Leveling leatherworking has really not been fun.
Worldworstretadin Mar 24th 2011 6:10PM
As someone who has a Worgen with skinning (to feed the leatherworking machine that is my Shaman) I can empathise with your frustration. It takes no effort to simply pst someone and ask if they mind you skinning their kills. If they say yes, give them a stack for their trouble after following them around for half an hour, or at least help them with their kills. If they say no, find somewhere else! Sure, we all have our "secret spots", but a little kindness goes a long way.
After giving a player a couple of Arctic Fur when we were both leveling in Northrend, I now get a pst from that player whenever I'm online and they're about to do their dailies.
Odinfrost Mar 24th 2011 6:52PM
@Blayne
Yeah I to have noticed the steady decline in player base politeness since vanilla, I for one don’t believe that it has changed because it has become a “more popular” game but because people have ceased to care about good in game manners. At one point this year I had someone camp my skinning character to steal the skinning once I looted, even “racing” me once I did loot. When I asked why they were persisting when they knew I was a skinner and would in fact like to skin my own kills their reply was “WoW is a competitive game” really, that’s what they said. That attitude is the prime reason this will almost certainly be my last WoW expansion, the sheer level of douchebagery displayed on a daily basis (at least on my server) has sucked most of the fun out of the game for me, if this is what counts as “community” then I will happily bow out when “that” new MMO finally launches…I am down to only talking to guildies at this point anyways.
/end rant
Bronwyn Mar 24th 2011 8:06PM
To all the people who say they don't loot- if you're doing this and you're not a skinner, please, just loot. You're losing out, too, by not picking up the loot that can be vendored. There's really no reason for you not to, barring a full inventory at the moment. I try not to be mean when I'm running on a skinner, but it's really frustrating when people leave mobs unlooted. In instances too- I'm shocked at how many people just flat out don't bother to loot. It doesn't take that much time- you can turn on auto-loot! And if you're in a group and you have a full inventory, you can just look at the loot and leave it, then someone else in the group can pick it up.
Be kind to your skinning brethren, and loot!
Aruhgulah Mar 24th 2011 10:28PM
@Ice: the easiest reply to that is: "Since you cursed at me for no reason, I'm not looting them at all."
Bad manners should have consequences. Outright rudeness as that should not be given any reward.
gamerunknown Mar 25th 2011 5:36AM
You do remember Vanilla was the time where there were no rules governing guild bank ninjaing, griefing (corrupted blood + living bomb in the AH), gdisbanding after stealing the entire guild bank, STV corpse camping and ganking people at in game funerals?
There are several theories as to why people behave in a manner that lacks basic empathy. The Penny Arcade succinctly summarises Zimbardo's theory of deindividualisation (you are not personally responsible and your victim doesn't look anything like a real human). This is compounded by the layer of protection that the cross-server LFG and the rule against naming and shaming provides. Before, if you were stung in a heroic, you could speak with their GM and if the GM laughed it off, their guild would quickly accrue a poor reputation on the server and find it hard to recruit. Several players with a tendency to hit need instead of greed transferred off my server or just quit playing.
While there's no general rule that will improve a player's in game behaviour, I think an approximate approach would be to ask yourself whether you would act that way if you were playing WoW (or an FPS) over LAN with your best friend (wouldn't you both get bored after corpse camping him for the 5th time?). Failing that, how would you act if you were at a games expo and playing co-op on a new level on a new game with a complete stranger? Chances are the stranger is somewhat experienced with video games, but may stand in the fire in this particular level: but being polite and helping them will probably grant you a new friend and will give you a greater chance of success.
Shrikesnest Mar 25th 2011 12:25PM
Ah, everybody remember back in the good old days, when everything was better? People were friendlier and nicer. The game was fun and worth playing. Free money and delicious spare ribs rained down from the sky in generous rations each morning, and we drank unicorn giggles and danced and frolicked in the warm grass all day long. Not like today, when people are rude and the game we like to play isn't perfect. Those were the days...
Budman Mar 24th 2011 3:12PM
Or the one where you are trying to help with a simple strat to help the overall group win and you are greeted with the shut up noob. When the Battlemaster,of the horde,Gladiator tells a simple strat to help the overall well being of a group don't disrespect that person .
Aruhgulah Mar 24th 2011 3:11PM
Anyway, a quick note about mob-sharing in Tol Barad -- I've noticed that you don't need to be grouped to get credit on the boss kills, like Tank. If you're there and you damage the boss-mob in some way, you get kill-credit even if you didn't tag it first.
mewmaniac9999 Mar 24th 2011 3:19PM
Tol Barad is the only place that does this that I know of, unfortunately, and only for those boss-type mobs.
SerenityNow Mar 24th 2011 4:10PM
I've seen that happen elsewhere too, on quest bosses. However, it only seems to work if the other player killing them is of the opposite faction. But a couple of times now (particularly in Cata zones) I've been waiting to kill a quest boss. But there's been a Hordie in front of me. So I'll wait for him/her to get a few hits in, then I join in to help them (don't tell Varian!). Very pleasant surprise when after the boss dies I get credit aswell and can hand in the quest.
Aruhgulah Mar 24th 2011 7:59PM
@Serenity: I haven't noticed the faction thing with Tol Barad boss-mobs; it doesn't seem to matter which faction tags it.
Longtime Lurker Mar 24th 2011 3:14PM
Hey, "Howdy!" is MY greeting! ;)
Great article, and I couldn't agree more, especially about rolling "Need."
I'll roll Need on off-spec gear, but only after letting everyone know in chat at the beginning of the run that I'm happy to trade to someone else who Needs for Main-spec... This just saves time, rather than asking "may I Need?" at each drop...
The ability to trade items within a group is one of the best features Blizz has introduced, imho...
Cheers!
Saeadame Mar 24th 2011 6:21PM
That's a great idea, actually. I'll definitely do that in the future, it certainly would save time. What I've been doing is waiting to see if anyone else int he group presses "need" for an item, and then "needing" it and saying "for offspec" in chat. It makes it so there are no conflicts, and saves me trading it to someone else.