WoW Rookie: How to deal with disruptive players and hate speech

My 9 year old has medical conditions that keep him from having many friends or going outside to play. He has to be homeschooled. For entertainment and to give him a feeling of exploration and adventure, we play warcraft. Other people can be very cruel in real life, so warcraft is a nice escape from that.
But wow has gotten nearly as bad. you can't hardly be in Tol Barad or Orgrimmar without hearing "ni$&@!," '$#%," and other hateful language. using the LFD tool is just as bad if not worse. My son plays a prot paladin/holy paladin so that any group he gets in will have a healer or a tank as needed. But the number of "fag elf" accusations we've seen in LFD is discouraging.
I'm not even counting "noob" and "you suck" in all this.
We're really thinking about moving on if things don't get better. What can we do about this?
hope you can help,
a mom
You can see the happy and the sad in that -- happy that our beloved game can help a family; sad that we as players can have such a negative impact. My initial reaction was to hope this was being blown out of proportion. After all, I tend to get riled about slurs and hate speech myself and do so very quickly. Maybe A Mom was being oversensitive?
While it's fair to say maybe kids shouldn't be in the game, families absolutely have a reasonable expectation that they can play together.
Data tells the truth
I wanted to be sure. Since I received the letter, I kept track of hateful slurs and speech I saw in the game. Now, one week on one server is hardly a statistically significant portion of the WoW experience -- but still, starting somewhere ... I kept track of each example of hate speech and normalized it across my play time.
This is what I found about frequency. This includes the trade and general channels in the cities, as well as the raid chat in Tol Barad:
- Slurs about sexual orientation 1 every 2 minutes
- Racial slurs One every 3 to 4 minutes
- Misogynist language One every 1 minute in general, but almost none in Tol Barad
In the end, I can definitely see why A Mom would be concerned about exposing a growing child to this kind of language. The question becomes what you can do about it.

World of Warcraft has built-in chat filters. These filters are your first line of defense. They don't catch everything; creative folks are constantly changing curse words, finding new ways to say the same old junk. Using the chat filters won't do anything to stop the offensive chat, but they will garble the words on your own screen. Chat filters are not a total solution, but they will help.
Ignore list
Become good friends with your Ignore feature. All you have to do to ignore someone is right-click the name in your chat dialogue and choose Ignore. That person will not appear in your chat window and they won't be included in PUGs you join through the random Dungeon Finder.
If someone's language is bothersome to you, don't be shy about hitting Ignore and moving on with your life.
Report Player
You can report a player the same way you ignore them. It's hard to get a good sense for whether Blizzard prefers you to report players or simply ignore them, but I tend to report particularly offensive hate speech and then immediately follow up by ignoring them.
In a sense, Blizzard can't take action about these problems if no one reports them. If we want the GMs to handle a problem, we should notify them of it.
Avoid hot spots
This tip is probably the most important for avoiding children's exposure to inappropriate discussion: Avoid the place where that language is most common.
You tend to find problematic behavior congegrated in the capital cities, especially Orgrimmar and Stormwind. Goldshire in Elwynn Forest is strictly off-limits except when you must level through it.
Sadly, Tol Barad sees a lot of hateful language, which is somewhat part and parcel of a contested PVP zone.
Turn off chat
Lastly, feel free to turn off general and trade chat. Find yourself a good, family-friendly guild to hang out with and stay away from the general populace chat channels. This is probably the best way to control what your child is exposed to, since the only chat you'll see is with these friendly folks.
WoW is a pretty awesome game. But with any game so huge, you'll inevitably come across some folks who just don't know how to behave in public. The best way to minimize exposure to those folks is to simply avoid and ignore them.
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Reader Comments (Page 3 of 7)
Darky Aug 12th 2011 3:16AM
G-rated servers would need a lot of enforcing, which RP realms do not have, but sorely need, IMHO a G-rated server would actually make people roll characters there for the sole purpose of soiling it. I'm not saying it's a bad idea I'm saying that blizzard doesn't have that kind of man power to stop all the anonymous banter that will go on in trade, not to mention that blizzard (and esrb) specifically says that online communications are not an enforceable thing. Having said that, if there were a G-rated server (properly enforced) I would almost certainly roll a character on there... but knowing blizzard they probably wouldn't make an oceanic server for it (cough - no oceanic RP realm - cough).
Hairfish Aug 12th 2011 5:17AM
A supposedly G-Rated server in a game that involves killing humanoids, drinking, and an entire race addicted to a "power drug" just doesn't make much sense to me.
But if you want to call it PG and simply ban hate speech and profanity, I'm up for that.
Strawder Aug 11th 2011 8:50PM
With quests involving toting an enemy's head in your duffel bag, dropping ogres into helicopter blades and saving dragons from being used as sexual slaves, World of Warcraft never has been, and never will be, a children's game. The Saturday Morning cartoon graphics though, label it that way to most parents, though.
I was in a Gamestop one time where a 8 year old was trying to get his mom to buy him Grand Theft Auto 3. The clerk tried his best to dissuade this woman by telling her it was a game where you beat up hookers and shot police. All she wanted to know was "Is there nudity in it?"
All that said, there's really no place for the language and hate that goes on in WoW currently. As I tell people in our guild who ask about guild chat's rules, "Just because we're a mature guild (adults) doesn't mean guild chat should look like Eddie Murphy: Raw".
Tirrimas Aug 11th 2011 9:04PM
I find the attitude displayed by the mother in your story quite odd. She's worried about nudity (unquestionably a natural part of human life) and not about killing cops?
Understand, I'm saying this in a general, society-wide indictment of our Puritanical fear of sex, not as a specific complaint against that mom - though she deserves what she gets when she sees what the game's really about.
SymbolSix Aug 11th 2011 10:08PM
Yeah, if a child isn't mature enough to deal with obscene language, why are you letting them play a game about two factions at war with all manner of vile beasts, as well as each other? For real, someone who's going to be damaged by /trade is too young to appreciate the moral complexity of, for example, the slaughter of the druids in Stonetalon or the sack of Camp Taurajo.
Besides which, why hasn't anyone considered whether it's okay to inflict a nine year old tank on some poor pug? I'm not saying it's impossible, per se, for this kid to be a decent tank at 9 years old, but I find it highly unlikely.
Sergel Aug 12th 2011 4:39AM
Well to your first point, it could be that the child simply won't understand all those aspects. When i was that age, i played teen rated games that dealt with some mature themes, and i watched anime that dealt with even more mature themes. The thing was my mind couldn't really grasp all that, like many kids, and i just enjoyed playing the game.
With that said, i do agree with all your points.
Prelimar Aug 11th 2011 8:54PM
i'm not a parent and haven't been a single-digit age for 4 decades now, and even *i* turn off General and Trade channels. i don't miss 'em. do that, get a good guild, and you're set. not much can be done about battlegrounds, i'm afraid. that's where some parent-to-child discussions can take place, i guess.
yateschris3105 Aug 11th 2011 8:55PM
gotta love freedom of speech,even blizzard cant trample that or be sued.
i onyl sign the tos when thers a patch and only for that day of the patch :)
blizz was smart theyd have you hit accept everytime you logged in.
they gave us a big loophole
redikolous Aug 11th 2011 9:12PM
That's not what freedom of speech means.
Blizzard can regulate the speech in their game, and in fact do. When people report them, the person using slurs gets banned...sometimes.
dj.clayden Aug 11th 2011 9:17PM
Have you considered studying law?
Or reading?
locksoflocks Aug 11th 2011 9:21PM
Ahhh but they can, see intellectual property is exactly that, property, and they have a right to refuse access to anyone for any reason they deem legit.
Deathknighty Aug 11th 2011 9:30PM
Funny troll is funny.
uhohmatt Aug 11th 2011 10:21PM
Being an idiot is not the same as being a troll...
Guapa Aug 12th 2011 5:35AM
but idiot troll still be best kind of troll me think.
icbleu Aug 11th 2011 9:04PM
One suggestion only. GO TO PROUDMOORE. In my experience, its the most tolerant server in Wow.
Amaxe Aug 11th 2011 9:09PM
Not sure if this addon covers everything, but there is a set of addons called BadBoy which is really good at filtering out offensive materials. I believe one of the related addons allows you to create a filter which blocks out chat which uses certain offensive or irritating words. (Yes, "Anal" is already preincluded).
I've noticed that being in Stormwind is less annoying now.
redikolous Aug 11th 2011 9:14PM
I had to look for this, and I found it, thank you.
http://wow.curse.com/downloads/wow-addons/details/badboy_ccleaner.aspx
amnbrownie Aug 11th 2011 9:13PM
It's not about the jokes or the violence in the game. In fact, much of it, a 9 year old isn't going to understand anyway. It's about PEOPLE being deliberately obnoxious and often hateful. People behind the safety net of an avatar saying horrible things to get a rise out of someone else.
While I'm a fan of "free speech" and I personally don't get offended by the majority of things people say, it's still something I particularly don't care to read. There's a difference in being offended and mature enough to know when something just isn't funny.
Today a tank joined my random, and says, "sup (insert slur about sexual orientation here)."
That's just rude and unnecessary. This is a multiplayer game, and there's no reason to join a random and that kind of stuff to people. You wouldn't say that to a client or customer at work, so why say it here? Are you that desperate for attention that you have to insult people?
Cursing, dirty jokes, or whatever your taste is has appropriate channels. And I'm all for that; we have plenty of it in our gchat, where everyone is cool and understands what is appropriate and what isn't.
Manners, respect and courtesy are headed out the window, and our world will be in a sorry state when that happens. "it's just a game" doesn't cut it. I just don't understand why people have to be so rude just because they can. Grow up.
Antt Aug 11th 2011 9:14PM
As mentioned above there are other realms out there that have seem to be blessed with a majority of mature sensible players. Maybe the mother and her son could start a whole new adventure of rolling different characters (maybe a Druid so he can do the whole healing and tanking thing) on different realms in the epic search of a realm that best personifies the Azerothian code of honour and propriety!
Rezina Aug 11th 2011 9:22PM
I am so sad after reading this mom's letter. I am a mom too. I am constantly offended by the things I see in Trade Chat. I retired my Tank because of the abusive language, and I have an "ignore" list a mile long. I understand that the game is rated T for Teen. But, I don't see the language and verbal abuse that goes on sometimes as "Teen" Rated. I am a grown adult with a mouth like a sailor in the privacy of my own home (out of earshot from the kids of course) and the stuff said shocks and angers me. I had even quit playing WoW for a time and started playing RIFT. RIFT's community is much more polite and grown-up, but it just wasn't the same engaging gameplay that WoW was. (And the gold spammers have taken over! )
I just wish there was somethng more that a GM, or the community as a whole, can do. I keep hitting ignore and keep reporting, but it seems that nothing is being done by Blizzard.
BTW--I can tell you right now that the verbal abuse is why there is a tanking shortage. I was cussed out regularly because I did not run through and chain-pull. I actually targeted casters 1st and made sure my healer was ready.