Bear in mind that the officer didn't know about the real life situation, he was mailing after someone didn't attend a raid. It's true that the offficer shouldn't have been harsh when he didn't know the circumstances at all, but remember that officers have to put up with a lot of bullshit excuses. The fact that he apologised once he found out what had happened to me shows he just got annoyed at something and didn't realise he was being harsh to someone who had a genuine excuse.

Also, please don't point out the fact that this is a game and make it seem like that makes it completely unimportant. If you don't show up for a 25 man raid, and because of that it doesn't go ahead, you're not hurting the GAME you're hurting the 24 other REAL people who wanted to raid but couldn't because of you. It's completely right that he took time off raids after what happened in real life, its not OK to say that the game isn't important because its just a game - there are other real people playing it too.

/facepalm.

No. No game is more important than a member of your family dying. EVER. This guy should have told that officer to go fuck himself. Repeatedly.

I missed all of my raiding obligations this week because I had to evacuate during Hurricane Irene. Since I am my guild's MT, we actually wound up not raiding this week. My guild was perfectly reasonable and understanding about it, because I had a serious real life issue. This clown in this letter did it wrong.

And yes, IT IS A GAME. I don't worry about how I inconvenienced someone because real life intervened because it's a game. Nothing prevents the raid from going on without one person, and nothing keeps the other 24 from playing WoW.

Man, this game cane really mess up people's perspectives.

To reiterate, the Officer wasn't told why this member was missing from the raid that evening and sent this mail. An apology was offered, and this scuffle should be over.

Regarding missing raids and letting down your team: A game shouldn't rule your life, but you should have the courtesy and respect you'd have for any real-life team (basketball, hockey) or group social obligation (going out to eat, attending a party). Put yourself at a high priority, but keep in mind others as well.

If you're playing Assassin's Creed offline by yourself, go ahead and enjoy the fact you're tied to nobody and nothing but your own desire to progress. But once you get around others, you're mixing yourself up in that complex web of social interaction where people get hurt, angry, disappointed, and mistrustful if you do things without considering them.

Thus, if someone passes away, make a forum post. Tell the appropriate parties. Take your time off (keep yourself at #1). Do your due diligence to fill your team/friends in on your situation so there's no questions (or room for questions to arise) regarding your absence.

I can't imagine anyone would say "skip the funeral / mourning and kill that boss!", but I think we can all agree you shouldn't shirk your responsibilities (i.e. filling people in) in the process.

"He clearly didn't know the reason why you missed the raid, or he never would have been so harsh."

I disagree , mamas. If he didn't know he shouldn't have started out with a dickish mail msg.

Polite and respectful people don't start cussing at people right off the start. A mail msg could simply ask if there is a problem, not bitching him out.

The mail itself would have probably pissed me off enough to quit on the spot. Or at least justify my quitting on the spot. Apologizing was the right thing for the officer to do. Scolding him and warning him/her (the officer) to not be a dick in the future would also be the right thing to do.