Honey, I love you very much, but I just don't think this is going to work out between us. I'm a fun-loving Undead warrior and you're a giant, evil decorative statue. Sure, I truly enjoy sharpening my weaponry on your boots, and I know you'll miss those Saturdays where I'd rent a crane and a pressure washer and clean the bird droppings from your facade. But I feel it's time to move on to people of our own species. I knew you'd understand. (Thanks to Christopher for the screenshot!)
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