Breakfast Topic: How do you handle real-life interruptions?
by Robin Torres 
Feb 12th 2012 at 8:00AM
I actually don't like the phrase "real life" when describing what happens in the physical world because it implies that the interactions we have in Azeroth aren't real. Captain Obvious says that WoW is not a single-player game. When we are playing Mass Effect, we don't affect anyone else if we get up to take a bio break or comfort a child. But in World of Warcraft, if we are in a group of any size, we affect others every time we AFK.
The phrase "real life is more important than WoW" is a mantra we hear all the time, and it is true in that you shouldn't shirk responsibilities in the physical world in order to play. However, if you have committed yourself for a period of time to other players, it is the same thing as committing yourself to any group of people in the physical world. Breaking that commitment falls under the same etiquette umbrella, whether in game or out.
Now, we can't anticipate all interruptions, and emergencies do trump the inconvenience of your online friends. (Captain Obvious points out that the same situations happen in the physical world as well. He's rather annoying that way.) But most of the time, we can avoid or limit our unplanned AFKs with proper scheduling and preparation. Lisa and I tackled this subject recently and have also tackled it in the past. All players have to handle interruptions, but we don't all handle them the same way.
The Spawn is now old enough so that any call-outs from the bedroom can wait a few minutes until The Spousal Unit or I are in a good place to AFK. But when she was much younger and needed to be dealt with quickly, I tended to solo pretty much exclusively. Even now, I usually decline group activities when she is awake and perfectly entertained just so that I can drop everything in case she needs me. I am probably being overly cautious, however. The Spawn is a fellow gamer and treats us like she wants to be treated most of the time. If she's in the middle of a tricky part in Skylanders, she doesn't want to be interrupted, either.
How do you deal with interruptions in the physical world while you are playing? Do you think that AFKing with no warning is OK for certain situations other than dire emergencies? Are you more considerate with guildies than you are in PUGs when you have to leave the computer? (Note: I'm asking about PUGs that aren't funsuckers, of course.) And if you are a caregiver, how do you deal with your playtime?
Filed under: Breakfast Topics
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
tenaciousmonkey Feb 12th 2012 8:08AM
I've only been playing while my daughter is asleep for the most part, only recently have I started playing on the weekend mornings (by giving up my beloved sleeping in...giving up sleeping lazy to be awake and playing lazy; still being lazy =D) I'll usually only do solo stuff for about 30 min after we put her to bed just in case of the randomness she sometimes has w/ getting up, and if it's a true emergency (she's puked, she's scared of something), if I'm in a guild group, I'll let them know what's up so they hold off; if it's a pug, I'll usually type in what's happened, and drop group. I know it's probably not the best, but they're likely to be quicker about finding a replacement than waiting on me.
And if I'm playing while she's up, she'll run in and out of the office, sitting in my lap occasionally telling me that my tauren "isn't smiling".
musicchan Feb 12th 2012 3:18PM
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! :D
Arothand Feb 12th 2012 8:23AM
I have no problem with real life taking precedence (and I would expect it) as long as it's not repeatedly happening and as long as the person says quick "afk baby" or something like that so we know. Now obviously in a situation like LFR you always get the selfish a-holes who won't wait for anyone, but in a 5-man since I'm normally the tank I will wait for an afk dps or healer with baby aggro every single time. Now if it's going to take a long time the polite thing to do is to drop group, but a quick thing like giving an infant a bottle or a cuddle to stop them from crying is no problem for me.
Twill Feb 12th 2012 2:34PM
UGH. Do not wait for afk DPS in 5 mans. We have 2 other DPS in the group, keep going.
As long as it isn't the healer or tank going AFK, you can keep moving, albeit slower. Sorry DPS, you aren't mandatory. It's just the way it goes.
Bynde Feb 13th 2012 10:38AM
Twill, you're a good example of why I hate to PUG.
Luotian Feb 12th 2012 8:23AM
For the most part, interuptions aren't something I plan for. I play largely very early in the morning (see: now, 6:30 AM my time) or in the late evening (7:40-9ish) because my work schedule is a bit odd. If anyone is calling or knocking at the door during those times, its usually pretty important.
I will type afk every time, and as one DPS I don't think that's a big deal. You can usually keep going with 2 DPS and be fine, and I'll catch up and rock your meters again momentarily.
On my healer, I'm far more choosey about when and how I afk. If it is a phone call, I won't answer it or I'll try and talk and heal at the same time so as not to bother anyone. If it is something that can't be handled within moments, I'll apologize and drop group. Healer ques are not tank ques, and usually they'd be going by the time I got back if it is something I feel will take a little while to deal with.
Generally, I won't que unless I'm confident I'll have an hour of uninterrupted play time.
Motevia Feb 12th 2012 8:27AM
I have a baby and a husband. Usually when my husband is home and I want to play, he watches the baby for me so that I can do my LFR for the week. When he's not home, I don't run PUGs or LFR. I still do soloing and the occasional dungeon. Usually my daughter is content to sit on my lap or go play with her toys next to me if a dungeon pops up. She takes naps on my lap for a few hours every day, so that is my time to play and run dungeon content without worry about her waking up. There have been times where I've had to go AFK for a baby emergency and everyone I've met has been cool about that just like they would be in "real life". It also helps to have a supportive guild to run content with who understand when situations arise.
Luotian Feb 12th 2012 8:45AM
Seems to me that anyone that doesn't know that babies are a bit unpredictable and should always come first either has something very wrong with them or no experience with children whatsoever.
For the most part, even us single folk either have siblings or cousins (or work somewhere that has to have contact with kids at least some of the time). We all get it :).
Revynn Feb 12th 2012 11:53AM
- "She takes naps on my lap for a few hours every day . . "
I remember when our first born (now 4) was only a month or so old and still wanted to be swaddled when she slept. I would bundle her up, put my feet up on the coffee table and rest her on my legs as I played XBox. =)
Tili Feb 12th 2012 8:36AM
My Spawn are also getting old enough that they no longer need constant attention, especially the older one. Still, I rarely play in groups while they are both awake so that I can attend to their needs without inconveniencing others. Occasionally I will group up with guildies or friends during the day who know I have spawn and are willing to wait if I need refill a chocolate milk cup or arbitrate child justice.
The biggest thing for us is that our kids go to bed super early at night so we know that we have at least 3 hours of uninterrupted playtime every night to work on getting those points. And doing a few dailies or working on an achievement is a great daytime mommy break for me.
Apoman Feb 12th 2012 8:42AM
I really hate it when anyone goes AFK without telling me, so to avoid doing that myself in have 3 macros that announce that i must go AFK, apologize and tell whoever i'm with to kick me if they want. 1 is for family aggro, 1 is for emergencies, and 1 is for if im feeling unwell.
I've raided with many people with families and many of them have also macro'd for family aggro. I find that doing it like this is both polite, and it makes mopping up the probable wipe easier, if i know the tanks had to dash off I can either heal like crazy or announce a wipe.
Xantenise Feb 12th 2012 10:49AM
I like the idea of a macro for emergency AFKs. I should probably do that so I'm not keyboard mashing if everything falls apart IRL.
Zura Feb 12th 2012 9:12AM
I play with constant threat of interruption from my 2 kids, as my wife hates my involvement in wow who a passion and would never agree to watch them while I raid. So I only play when my kids AND wife are asleep, and pretty much have to drop group when the youngest wakes up crying. This is why I love LFR so much, as raiding was damned near impossible before. I have no problem dropping group, they can replace me in a few seconds. If kiddo goes right back to sleep, I'll requeue as healer for shorter queue.
gregorysoble Feb 12th 2012 9:28AM
Real life > WoW every day. It's a game, and so if something comes up, even if someone in my house says something to me, I'll quickly afk to talk to them. After all, WoW is a game and real life is life.
Joeygiggles Feb 12th 2012 9:35AM
I work a 12hr rotating shift 7am-7pm armed Nuclear Security. It has pros n cons when playing such as multiple days off in a row but its downsides as well. When trying to get everything else done in that day for the next I can barely make myself sit n play for a bit.
Fridays our guild does a raid. 10man DS with a select grp of players. This week was rough on me since it was my weekend to work FRI-SUN. Mind you im 27 with 2 roommates same age and one roommate who works opposite schedule on nights who likes to party. Lets just say sleep is a luxury I get sometimes. So after 3 hrs sleep thursday night, a lil more than a 13 hr day at work I was ready to pass out at my pc around 930. Raid finished bout 1130 full clear with some achievements done and a HM. Then another night of maybe 4hrs of sleep. Last night I just couldnt get myself to playand pretty much screwed over my arena partner after I said the day before Id be on. Feel like an ass about it but things in RL do interfere and it sucks lol
Larry Feb 12th 2012 9:34AM
The spousal unit and I co-manage a fairly large level 25 Horde Guild and care for my mother who suffers from alzheimers. We have come together as a huge family unit and understand the needs that arise with not only our caregiver responsibities but those of our fellow guildees. Our guild raid practices are designed to accomodate those circumstances and it flows rather well. I don't run LFR so it allows the spousal unit the time and dedication to do so without interuption most of the time. We have always felt that if you conduct yourself with dignity and respect for those around you both in our game life as well as out of game life then the greater "game" of life is so much more rewarding!!! Simple respect for those you interact with never guarantee's that you won't come accross the asshats of the world but it always puts you in the right place doing the right thing and doesnt that make both worlds we walk thru a better place to be? "not a sermon, just a thought" LOL.
xrarndx Feb 12th 2012 10:08AM
Brb.
Swifteye Feb 12th 2012 10:33AM
Having a live-in boyfriend + NOT having kids = win.
Lack of kids means one of the single biggest sources of unplanned interruption is off the table. Living with boyfriend means there's always somebody who's not me to get the door or phone. And to be honest, we're largely reclusive (partly due to working graveyard shift, partly due to just being hugely reserved individuals who get stressed by too much social interaction), so we hardly ever get phone calls or visitors anyway. And we like it that way!
Basically I have only ever had to afk in a group activity a couple of times for a bio emergency. And I have been understood and patiently waited on those times, both because I do it VERY seldom, and because my fellow gamers tend to know what it's like when you get lazy about cooking and decide to eat at Taco Bell of all places.
Ad134 Feb 12th 2012 10:42AM
I prefer the term "meatspace".
rfranzoy Feb 12th 2012 10:47AM
Playing tank is really a problem in regard to this.
I remeber once having an entire phone conversation while tanking echo of baine and i cant really recall most of what i said but i remember baine destroyed the platform where i was tanking.
So usually i have to wait for the fight im currently in to stop and then i drop out of the group wich is very rude for the rest of the group but for me is just a nuisance because of the tank instaqueue.... sorry.