Being a man, I'm not quite sure why women put up with men.

I mean, seriously, we're a-holes. Maybe not all, but the ones I've met that aren't jerks are wussy pantywaists. Not a great set of alternatives.

Seriously, ladies: men think about one thing from oh, age 12 to perhaps late 20s-early 30s. Some men never grow out of it. Depending on where a girl hits his hot-or-not meter, adjusted for his own self-image, a boyman will say or do nearly anything. Buy a puppy? Sure. Spend himself poor? Sure. Risk his life? Definitely.

By and large, the arc of the first couple of decades of a man's life are determined by his search for the opportunity at that. Obsessed with his job? It's because the status, power, and wealth will attract women better. Honest, sweet, and kind? Because he's figured out those are easy buttons to push, but you have to be credible. As a good friend said once: "If you can fake sincerity, you've got it made."

Women - even the jaded, cynical ones - have NO idea what that drive is like.

And in case people think this is a man-bashing thread, let me point out that (largely) women have controlled the mating of the species for the last couple of million years. Men behave in the manner most likely to ensure our success with...you guessed it, women. Sure, there are plenty of instances where she didn't get to chose the first bit (to put it delicately) but there's no way the offspring of the monster that would do such a thing would survive childhood without the mother's consent.

So ladies, we're what you made us. And there is the final irony.

No, the final irony is having a daughter, and knowing that no matter how much you try to warn her, she's swimming in a pool of sharks and it's almost impossible that one or more of them won't break her heart.


Re the fellow referenced in the letter, he's an ass. He's totally playing you, without risking the relationship he's in. I know, believe me, I know. Just walk away.

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