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Drama Mamas: The results

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

About once a year, we publish the results of our advice, as told to us by the original letter writers. This year, we have too much for one week, so you'll get the first part this week and the rest in two weeks. If we've answered your letter and you haven't written in to tell us what happened, please send an email to robin@wowinsider.com.

Last March, The Other Woman told us about a love triangle in which she was embroiled. She responded soon after with painful but positive results:
Dear Drama Mamas,

I just wanted to give a huge thank you to you and others who commented on my post. I *was* the Other Woman in the volatale love triangle. I decided to cut all ties with him, explaining that even if he left his fiance it was possible it would have never worked out between the two of us. I explained even if he left her as others said, 'a relationship built on cheating' was a bad place to start, and we should take some time apart until we know what we really want.
His fiance found out he was cheating and left him, but our relationship couldn't really bounce back. The main thing that stuck out was that I really didn't know him very well. Everyone's personal stories about going through the same thing made me realize I was only seeing the things I wanted to. I ended up just cutting all ties and moving on, he ended up being extremely clingy and obsessive. I saw quickly he wasn't anything that I thought he was. Luckily we hadn't met in my mains guild, so guild drama or just being uncomfortable in general there didn't become a problem.

If I could give advice to anyone in a situation like this it would be that the internet lets people be who they want to be, and most of the time that's all you see. I decided to take some time away from internet land(mainly WoW), I graduate Uni in a week, and have been spending as much time as possible with people in the real world. It was some of the best advice I got, sometimes you just need to get away from the world of anonymity. Thank you again for featuring my drama and both yours, and everyone else's very helpful comments. This wont be a mistake I will be making again in the future!

-No longer the 'Other Woman
A guy who is a minor got embroiled in a romance where the other guy thought he was a girl. (Regular readers know that embroiling happens a lot in this column.) I'd like to hear further from Fake because his results were given in the comments soon after his letter was published, so we don't quite have closure.
First off, the advice given has been great. Thank you so much for helping with the situation. Everything I stated in that letter is the truth. It all happened. My parents hardly talk to me and we don't get along that much. I stay in my room and just socialise of wow, Facebook etc. I know about the dangers of the Internet and what I did was wrong. My friend knew from the start that I was using her facebook and she was fine with it as it was all private if you weren't friends with her. This guy I was talking to is the same age as me. And as of now this is still going on. However, not for much longer.. This HAS happened before and it's usually turned out okay. But I came for advice on this because it's so much bigger and been going in for longer. My friends on wow don't know about this so they're not involved also. I probably won't be telling my parents about what's happened, but I will be doing everything else mentioned.

We don't always get to letters right away and sometimes that means the results happen before the column does. Happily, Chained to Azeroth became unchained without our help.

Hi Drama Mamas,

Thanks for printing my story. It was published quite some after I wrote it, so I really didn't expect it to be printed. But, I thought I would give you an update for your next "results edition", since the situation has improved quite a bit.

Tom got into D3, having gotten the Annual Pass, and he loves it. I love it too, and am starting to feel like I'll be ready to play WoW again by the time D3 has run its course. I've also gotten him out of his shell a little bit and he's starting to talk more about other things, which he hasn't done in quite some time. Apparently real life has been quite stressful for him lately since I first met him back in Wrath, so between that and the effort we were both putting into doing Cataclysm's harder content, it wasn't exactly something he was keen on talking about. As always, it's the little miscommunications in relationships that lead to the biggest problems it seems, heh.

Kyle and I have gotten some chances to get together with him once in a while since I wrote, and we had fun playing Rock Band and some other non-WoW games. I still want to get him to increase the diversity of the games he plays a bit, though, so I'll keep trying at that.

I also got Kyle into League of Legends, and we're both enjoying that quite a bit. Kyle likes to play support (LoL's version of a healer), and I like to play the tank, so we're both having quite a bit of fun playing the more challenging roles. We've also begun doing some retro gaming on consoles, which is entertaining for us as well.

And finally, on my end, I've started dating someone who is a ton of fun to hang out with. We go out to the movies and do other fun stuff out and about very often, so my social life feels a lot more rich and complete for the time being. =)

Your advice about game chat programs and recognizing my needs in the friendship was appreciated (Real ID has been quite useful in helping us communicate), but luckily this situation kind of resolved itself. Thanks a bunch!

(No Longer) Chained to Azeroth

Drama, drama, drama. Irked at Internet Horndog responded to our letter and some of the commenters in the comments section of the original column. Note: The Drama Mamas and many of the readers were a bit hard on him, so some defensiveness is understandable. Happily, he made a good decision and moved on to greener pastures.
Okay......I'm the OP here. Let me clarify a few things:

1) I already feel bad about it, I already know I messed up, I already know I was an asshole. No need to rub it in.
2) I'm gay. I have no interest in the GM whatsoever.
3) Yes, I agree everything should have been handled in whispers. That was my main issue with this to begin with. I simply am not comfortable with overt flirting in guild chat unless it's reciprocal.
4) When I said explicit flirting, I meant the explicit part. There were times where it got awfully close to him trying to cybersex her in gchat. Not trying to defend what I did, but it was extremely discomforting.
5) It was heavily implied that the GM only put up with his behavior because he was a very skilled core raider. As I said, I was not a raider, therefore I felt my requests to get him to knock it off wouldn't have much weight.
6) I quit the guild and transferred servers to a place where I am much happier now. Hopefully they've moved on and are happier as well.

Any guild where I have to turn off guild chat or ignore members is not a guild I want to be a part of. That's why I left.

Obviously I overreacted, obviously I should've kept it to whispers, obviously I should've handled it like an adult. I'm not trying to defend what I did here, but what's done is done.
Stay tuned for more results in two weeks!

Dodge the drama and become that player everyone wants in their group with a little help and insight from the Drama Mamas. Play nice ... and when in doubt, ask the Drama Mamas at robin@wowinsider.com. Read Robin's section of this post on how to get your letter answered and please remember that we cannot answer privately.

Filed under: Analysis / Opinion, Drama Mamas

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