Filed under: Drama Mamas

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

Happy Presidents' Day, if you are in the United States! Otherwise, happy Monday.

We are getting in letters for an all-new results edition of Drama Mamas, but we could still use some more. If you have written the Drama Mamas and we have answered you in print, please send us an email at robin@wowinsider.com. We will compile the responses in a future column, once we get enough of them.

What's up Drama Mamas?!

Today I come with a problem of sorts... I'm part of this guild where we were all pretty close and get along great, we have been that way throughout cataclysm and I feel sorta connected to these folks.

Now about a month or so ago a few of our core raid members that were originally on the team I was part of quit the game. That caused a rift in our guild and the leader of our second raid team stepped up to the plate and now leads our core group (as well as the guild but that's a different story). While we were trying to figure out who makes the cut for our first raid group we held try outs of sorts and in the group was myself and the rogue from the second group (we both play rogues so we needed to see who got the spot). Well I was beaten by the rogue of the second group by a slim margin so the leader decided to take him on as a regular.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

I think it is long past time for another results edition of Drama Mamas. Some letter writers have already sent me the outcome of our advice, which is always wonderful. But we could still use some more. If you have written the Drama Mamas and we have answered you in print, please send us an email at robin@wowinsider.com. We will compile the responses in a future column, once we get enough of them.

On to the drama ... This week, we have another RP romance conundrum.

Dear Drama Mamas --

I've recently started roleplaying on Wyrmrest Accord, and I really love it! It's a fun way to meet new people and really get into your character, even if I only do it somewhat-casually. However, I have an issue that I need some help with. When I first joined my roleplaying guild it was fine and dandy, but one person in particular gave me more attention than anyone else. I was fine with it, as we were in character and my character was single and all, so I flirted a bit and over time our characters started a (somewhat) romantic relationship.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

In the video above, Candace's friends are off having fun without her. Since she is unwilling to find her own fun, she takes a portal to Mars to hang out with strangers -- and breaks into song. There are parallels with this week's letter (except for the song part).

Hi Robin & Lisa,

I'm finally writing in with my own dilemma. Since I started playing this game in mid-Wrath, I've played with my girlfriend and our mutual friend. We have a strong bond and truly enjoy playing together, and GF and I have even met our friend IRL. In Wrath, I led our 10 man raid group, and we loved every minute of ICC. Once the Cataclysm was upon us, we expected to continue raiding. However, things rarely work out as planned, and we missed T11 completely, mostly due to the dissolution of our guild. Eventually I became frustrated with lack of progress and quit the game for a while.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

We've talked before about how to leave your guild, but what happens after that?

Hey Drama Mamas!

Today i write to you lovely ladies with a problem that I have been wrestling with for almost 4 years: finding someone to play World of Warcraft with. Here is the high and low of it, or rather the long and short:

Four or so years ago my brother starts playing a game that I considered to be a money sand trap: World of Warcraft, I cannot honestly say I was friendly to the franchise as at the time I was Neverwinter Night's personal slave (still am sometimes) but to make a long story short (too late) I was persuaded to take a vacation to Azeroth and I have never left. I fell in love with the planet and its people and while my hearth stone will always be set to Neverwinter, I am really enjoying my time in Azeroth.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

When is it OK to AFK during a boss fight? The answers range from "Never, unless you are about to call 911!" to "Any time you need to. Real life comes first!" This week, we address this common conundrum.

Not a specific instance of drama but it definitely causes it often enough. I really love instancing but have been a bit stressed recently about how to deal with interruptions.

How do you handle them? Knock on the door, kids waking up, anything really. We're not all college kids where the worst that could happen would be a power-outage or dorm fire alarm.

From what I read there is not much help or sympathy out there - although that may just be the minority. They mostly say to not even run instances, which I can sympathize with - they want to run it fast - but I cannot accept that as an answer. What do they do when they have to answer the door during a boss fight? Really.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

We get very attached to our online pseudonyms. But how unique are they, and what if you come across someone with the same name and a bad reputation?

Dear Drama Mamas,

I regularly comment on a certain WoW-based blogging-slash-news site under a given username that I've been attached to for many years. The site is read by a lot of people, and I've told quite a few stories there regarding events on my home realm, and today I had the unfortunate pleasure of overhearing mention of someone with a name near-exactly the same as mine whilst on an alt. But not in a good way. The doppleganger name was being addressed with disdain and malice (hate, even). I did a bit of digging on the armory and discovered that the character in question wasn't some fresh low-level character--it was 85, moderately geared, and even shared classes with my main that I had indeed, come to mention on occasion. What makes this slightly more interesting is that none of my characters share the name I use on the site--the name is unique to that location only.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

Loot drama rears its ugly head yet again this week.

Good morning Drama Mamas,

I was recently joined a guild run (not my guild) of Dragon Soul on my mage. I have never really had problems raiding on my alts. My main is in a semi hardcore raiding guild, and we were 8/8 in the first week of dragon soul. So on the off days I like to raid on my priest or mage. I really didn't think much of raiding with nine other people all from the same guild. It doesn't happen often, but guild runs typically go a lot smoother than complete PUGs.

When I joined the raid no clear loot rules were announced. I typically just wait till the first boss is killed to see how loot works. So we killed a boss and a piece of loot dropped that I could use (a wand), and the master looter in raid chat said main spec roll and linked the piece of loot. I ultimately rolled the highest; however, I got a bit suspicious how long it took for the master looter to award me the loot. The guild didn't say anything after they gave me the loot and I said thanks. I am pretty appreciative when I receive loot.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

This week's letter tells the story of friends in the physical world who aren't playing nice in WoW.

Hello Lisa and Robin,

I have two friends that I play WoW with. I'll call them Bill and Bob. Bill is kind of a rough-around-the-edges type in real life, and in WoW he typically makes abrasive comments in groups, needs on items for all his specs without any consideration for the rest of the group, and a bunch of other behaviors that I'd normally look down upon in a pug. I've had a few times where I've butted heads with him over this and other issues in both WoW and real life, and while he's gotten better about not treating me as badly, he hasn't learned to play nice with others quite as much, and I don't think he ever will, despite my repeated insistence that his behavior is not productive.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

We have two letters this week -- both about legendaries. The first letter is below, and the second letter and our responses are after the break.

Dear Drama Mamas,

I've been thinking a lot about taking a long break from WoW recently since I have almost no interest in playing. The problem is I'm an officer in an active raiding guild and also the only person in the guild close to getting the legendary staff. The only reason I've been playing lately has been to finish the staff for many guild. It'll take me only 2 weeks of doing a full clear to complete it so the guild will get the achievement and pet; however the other officers are too interested in the new 4.3 content to do anything in Firelands, inculding work on the legendary staff.

I'd really like to quit wow without burning any bridges or upsetting my long time guild mates, but I feel that if I quit with a 95% complete legenday I will be a considered a big jerk.

Thanks for any advice you can give me.

Burned Out

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

This week's letter comes from France, which shows just how universal WoW drama is.

Dear Drama Mamas,

I recently transferred from a bottom-of-the-charts server to a high-rated one, and after a few raid as un PUG on my new server I found a guild that fitted me perfectly. I was recruited as a main tank, for Firelands and oncoming 4.3. The first weeks were idyllic: tons of raid, even with HM (I was 3/7 normal mode before my transfer). I learned a lot and worked hard to progress. I was the only woman in the guild but there wasn't a problem for me, as I consider me IG as a player and a tank above all.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

This is the story of how a World of Warcraft duo saved a marriage and how the end of the duo now threatens that marriage.

Drama Mamas,

Hi! I'm a newlywed, but I have been with my husband for the better part of three years and I have been living with him for about a year now. When I first moved here, I didn't play WoW -- I was mostly into console gaming. However, our relationship began to get rocky and we decided that we needed something to bond over. He seemed to have so much fun playing WoW, so I decided to give it a try, and I loved it. He created a character specifically to play with me, and it was a blast. Five months of playing and six days /played on my main character, I finally hit 85 and got into some minor endgame content -- the quests, the heroics, the gear. All of this was leading up to the hope that I could join his guild with him -- the top raiding guild on our server -- and continue to play together.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

Recipe for smelly loot drama: Have clear rules that are only followed at the whim of the raid leader.

Eww.

Dear Drama Mamas,

I just wanted to get your thoughts about some drama that has recently unfolded in the guild. We have been raiding Firelands for a couple months now but have been having some disagreements about loot. The guild leader and her boyfriend lead the raid and I assist as the main tank, my wife is also in the raid. A couple of weeks ago a ring dropped and the guild leader's boyfriend won the roll. The following week the item dropped again and he rolled and won again. I was confused so I inquired about it, he had given it to his girlfriend.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

The above song was played once an hour on MTV when it first came out. (In before the "when they were still playing music" comments.) Twenty-seven years later and I'm still sick of it. It is also from a movie about a love triangle -- I hear -- which makes it kind of pertinent to this week's letter.

My name is Robby and I've recently stumbled upon your "Drama Mamas" section on WoW Insider. I find that this column focuses on an often overlooked facet in dealing with MMORPGS, the human part. I've been an avid WoW player for about 2.5 years. I'm fortunate enough to have a wonderful girlfriend of 4 years that plays with the same enthusiasm that I do. We try and play together when we can but life is life and we are limited by school and work etc.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

Once upon a time, two shy people made a duo. They leveled happily ever after ... except one of the players always had to choose the activities. So are they both actually happy?

I am very very close friends with my guildmate, oh let's call him Sam :). We're a guild of two and have been playing together for roughly two and a half years. Ever since RealID came out, we've been getting closer -- I'm very much an altaholic and being able to talk even if I wasn't on my main server was a huge blessing for us. When Cataclysm came out, he rolled on all the different servers I play alts on, created vanity guilds for the two of us, and now we have over a score of pairs that we play exclusively with each other! Now, every single toon he created was his own idea. I'll admit I definitely encouraged him to sprawl out with me but I never once said "You should come play on x server now!" or bullied him in any way.

Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm.

Again, we have another serious topic -- and again, we'd really love some lighthearted, fun candidates for next week, please.

I'm in a guild that is mostly comprised of married couples. I am particularly close to one woman in particular. We're the night-owls of the group, up after everyone else goes to bed, and we chat a lot.

She has recently disclosed some pretty awful marital abuse and power-and-control-gaslighting stuff as well as sexual abuse, marital rape, etc. Everyone else in the guild thinks they're together, and makes the usual references and requests that you'd make of a married couple like "hey, can you click the accept-rez thing for her?" or "do you know when he'll be back from work?" but the thing is - she's already LEFT her husband - he just won't let her TELL anyone!

He's still in guild with us, and still uses our raids as an opportunity to harass her, because he knows she'll be there, and knows she "can't" say anything.