Skip to Content

WoW Insider has the latest on the Mists of Pandaria!

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Beauty's Favorite Bone

Phat Loot Phriday Beauty's Favorite Bone
The man not named Spot stared at his bone. It was a good bone, from days gone by. He held it in his hands and heaved a huge sigh. Except for the thick glass of stout by his side, the man may have been holding back tears.

"Hey, there, buddy," the bartender said. "Why the long face?"

"This was given to me by friends," the druid sighed. "I've not see them since the last exp ... erience we had together."

"Why do you still keep it?"

"This is Beauty's Favorite Bone! It was a gift!"

"Uh huh," the bartender said, wiping down the oak counter with a moist rag. "That must be it."

"Fine," the man sighed. "You can transmog it. And look at it, it's awesome."

The bartender remained quiet.

"And I chew on it."

"Yeah, I thought so."

Item Note: Beauty's Favorite Bone is available from heroic Blackrock Caverns. All you strapping pandas should have no trouble getting it.

Picture Note: That is neither a worgen or bone. But this picture represents Not Spot in my head.

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Deep Thunder, Reborn

Phat Loot Phriday Deep Thunder, Reborn
"Throgg, we're supposed to be finding your dog."

"Our dog."

"Your dog," Lolegolas countered. "What are you doing in there? We're in a hurry."

"It's an outhouse," Throgg replied from behind the wooden door. "It's the Throne of Thunder. What do you think I'm doing?"

"Forging Deep Thunder," Lolegolas said. "Reborn."

"Really, little elf?" Throgg sighed.

"I've dealt with your puns for years. At this point, I'm allowed more than a few in vengeance."

"Doesn't matter. Can't make that until we get to the Lightning Forge."

"Thunder & Lightning," the blood elf commented idly. "I get it. It's like a theme. Maybe we can get a flame decal up the side of something to help illustrate the awesomeness."

"Why not?" Throgg asked. The outhouse shook a little. "You'd look good with mullet."

"I'd rather re-elect Garrosh."

The outhouse only thundered in response.

Item Note: Finally, it's the return of that old standby of overpowered Arenas... Deep Thunder. I kept wondering when it would make its comeback.

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Turkey Cage

Phat Loot Phriday Turkey Cage
From the journal of Lolegolas:

It's day 109. I feel the hours creeping longer as the rumbling pit in my stomach grows. We haven't eaten since we left Pandaria and even the sinew from my bow begins to smell tasty. If we don't eat soon, I will be forced to take a drastic measure.

The drastic measure's name is Gobbles. Throgg's pet turkey. He keeps staring at me with taunting caruncles and impeccable thighs. Throgg pulls Gobbles from his Turkey Cage to fight other pet trainers.

And every time, I think... we're starving to death. Why don't we just eat Gobbles? It can induce a Food Coma, but it does not fill me. The horror, the horror.


From the journal of Gobbles:

I sense my destiny.

Item note: It's time for another Thanksgiving celebration and there exists no better way to celebrate lots of food that doing pet battle with your Plump Turkey. It's a meal you can fight!

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Pandaren Brewpack

Phat Loot Phriday Pandaren Brewpack
"Call me Spot," the drunk Gilnean said. "Just call me Spot."

The dwarf barkeep started to slide another pint toward the druid but the burly man just waved it off.

"No, no," the man said. He gestured to his backpack. A thin tube extended from it, tapering off at the druid's hand. The man stuck the end in his mouth and gave it a good suck. "See? Got my own."

"What is that?" the dwarf asked with some small amount of shock.

"Pandaren Brewpack," the druid answered. "It's like a camel's back, but with beer. Works great."

"Why're you drinking, anyway?" the barkeep asked. "Since I'm exposition-dwarf tonight, you might as well tell me."

The Gilnean suddenly let loose a thick sob. "My friends left me! They disappeared in Pandaria and I haven't seen them in months."

"So, you thought the logical response would be to go to a bar and drink beer from your backpack?"

"I'm just a Spot sad," the Gilnean answered, burying his head in his forearms.

Item Note: You get it from Brewfest. And yes, I'm aware I radically misrepresented the way it works, but who hasn't wanted a Camelbak loaded with beer?

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Sap-Encrusted Legplates

Phat Loot PhridayL SapEncrusted Legplates
"Dear Throgg... dear lord this looks like it was written by a goblin with a broken hand being used as a pen by a drunken ogre."

"Uncle Grumpy wrote me?" Throgg peered at the letter. "He did! You should read it to me."

Lolegolas stared piercingly at the disconcertingly chipper orc. "I know you can read this."

"Reading isn't my thing."

"That's fine, writing clearly wasn't your uncle's thing. What language is this even in? Lok'tar thaal'kit sha'suun anariel... is that trollish and goblin in the same sentence?"

"Oh, it's in warriorese. Uncle doesn't really remember how to speak anything else. Took too many blows to the head. Just skip down to the bottom, it'll get to the point there." Throgg ignored the ever increasing piercing quality of the stare Lolegolas was leveling on him.

"All right then... let's see if I can find anything like words in this thing... Me go to big bear land. Boat sink. Me walk on bottom of water. Lots of bears. Many beers with bears. Go to Yak house, help yak kill bugs. Get pants. Good pants. Me draw picture of pants. You need get good pants. Are you warmly dress in pants? Pants useful. You come here, to bear land, and we drink beers with bears and get pants. Pants covered in tree goo, makes them strong." The blood elf blinked several times. Had he actually said that out loud? Had anyone else heard him say that out loud?

"You know what this means!?"

"That your uncle is legally dead?"

"No, that my friend Stinky. This means we're going on an adventure!" Throgg leapt to his axe cupboard, immediately pulling out various axes and tossing them over his shoulder. "What axe goes best with new pants?"

Item Notes: They're tanking pants, they drop in the siege of Niuzao Temple, and they are indeed encrusted with sap. Despite this, they vendor for 24 gold 16 silver 40 copper.


Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday, Mists of Pandaria

Phat Loot Phriday: Wind Rider Cub

Phat Loot Phriday
Soot growled as Lolegolas's Wind Rider Cub took a bite out of the Netherwhelp. The young wind rider pinned the dragonkin to the ground. For all the world, the cub looked like it was smiling.

"Look, I'm not trying to be obnoxious," the blood elf said mildly. "But I've been running with this cub for as long as I've existed in this... uh..."

"Story!" Miranda shouted helpfully. "Don't say column, it annoys people who follow continuity."

"... uh, story," Lolegolas finished. "Did you really think you were going to get in a pet fight with Throgg? I'm a hunter. It's built into my character.

Throgg finished smashing Miranda free from her cage, shaking his head in annoyance. "Didn't even get to fight. It's a sad world when an orc can't axe the bad guy."

Soot sighed as he sat on the ground. "I guess the Throgg Days of Summer are finally over."

"Really?" Miranda asked mildly. "That's how we're leaving this? With a bad pun?"

"Back to basics," Throgg said. "That's the new plan. Just the basics. Jokes and isolated stories. Think it'll work?"

"It'd take a miracle," Miranda answered.

"Hey," Throgg said suddenly. "Has anyone seen my dog?"

Item Notes: It's true! Lolegolas's first appearance was with a wind rider cub waaaay back when. Since this is one of the last PLP's before the expansion, I wanted to wrap up this somewhat meandering story with a shout out to the beginnings. Let the pandamonium begin!

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Horde Ballooon

Phat Loot Phriday Horde Ballooon
When we last left our heroes, the plot was finally moving forward again, thanks to your narrator's sudden obsession with pet battles. I mean, seriously, have you tried them out yet? OMG, awesome.

Lolegolas and Throgg rode from the gym in a cloud of dust and machismo. Like a pair of gods carved from solid stone, their rippling muscles and perfect definition would be the envy of any underwear model. Would be. The effect was ruined by a dainty red balloon drifting behind Throgg.

"I'm not clear on how the balloon is going to defeat our enemy," Lolegolas said.

"Won't. Balloon can't fight," Throgg growled. "Tired of pets. I want to hit him with my axe."

"That's a shame when you think about it. Orgrimmar's Fighting Balloons would be a hell of a team. It would certainly be better than Osh-Kosh Garrosh."

Throgg spared the blood elf a dry look. "Balloon doesn't fight. This is just for show. I'm going to hit the bad guy with my axe and rescue Miranda."

"Imagine if the balloon could cast spells," Lolegolas said. "Heal-ium, for example."

"Do you mind?" Throgg asked. "Trying to look imposing here."

Item note: Horde Balloon doesn't fight. Which, c'mon, Blizzard -- that'd be awesome! Fighting balloons. And since the Horde and Alliance can each get their balloons in a simple quest, that would be amazing. Am I the only one who thinks fighting balloons are awesome?

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Rabbit

Phet Loot Phriday Rabbit
Throgg leaned back against the pet gymnasium wall, chewing on a piece of straw while he watched Lolegolas. For his part, the blood elf did not look amused.

"What will you be fighting with today?" the old man asked Lolegolas. The gym trainer had long, flowing white hair and a slightly stoned look. Lolegolas had ultimately decided it was best not to ask about what the trainer used in his pipe.

"A fierce creature from the very depths of Stormwind," Lolegolas said. "A Rabbit."

The old man blinked.

"It has very pointy teeth, man," Lolegolas said. "It's mean."

"If you are going to rescue your friend Miranda," the trainer answered, "you will need to skillfully command your ... rabbit."

"Bun Morogh, I summon you!" Lolegolas shouted. The bunny appeared on the floor, twitching its nose disdainfully.

"Really?" the old man finally asked. "A bunny?"

"It's fierce if you rile it," Lolegolas commented weakly.

Pet notes: Seriously, man. Between Burrow, Adrenaline Rush, and Stampede, the Rabbit's got moves like Jagger. Give it a try before you scoff at the fuzzy herald of doom.

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Pet Bombling

Phat Loot Phriday Pet Bombling
Throgg growled at the human. "Where is the girl, human? Where is she?"

"Ha!" the soldier cackled, throwing his cape back over his shoulder. "I am Soot Dartsum of the Imperial Navy! I will not be cowed by the likes of an ogre."

"Orc," Lolegolas quietly pointed out. "Throgg's an orc. You can tell by the green skin. It's a dead giveaway."

"Quiet, fool!" the man said. He reached into his bag and hurled a large, black ball on the ground.

"Throgg, get down!" Lolegolas yelled. "It's a bomb!"

The human veritably clapped his hands with glee when the bomb grew a pair of legs. "No! It's my Pet Bombling, and it will lay waste on your foolish team."

The aforementioned orc cocked his head slightly to the side. "I'm sorry. Can you run that by me again?"

"That's how we fight here," Soot explained. "With pets. It's much more civilized than bashing on one another with axes."

"Oh," Throgg muttered. "I kind of like hitting people with axes. It's kind of my thing."

"So, you don't know how to fight wit pets?" the man asked. "That's going to be awkward. Look, there's a school right down the hill. Why don't you trot down and get a quick lesson? I'll wait here."

Item note: Pet Bombling can be picked up at the auction house fairly easily. It's a mechanical type pet.

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Amber Flammard of Klaxxi'vess

Phat Loot Phriday Amber Flammard of Klaxxi'vess
"You're joking," Lolegolas insisted. "There's no such thing as a flammard."

Throgg waved the Amber Flammard of Klaxxi'vess around in the air, making vague buzzing sounds as he did so. "Is, too! It's a noble weapon! The weapon of an orc!"

"Flammard? Really? A flammard's a thing?"

"It's a flame-based sword, that's all," Throgg insisted.

"So this bursts into flame? Doesn't that seem more like a Firelands thing than a panda thing?"

"Not literally flames," Throgg replied. "Just, like, wavy. This one's a reputation reward from the Klaxxi."

"So, it's not just a clever name. I guess it's looks curved and wavy. Kind of," the blood elf acknowledged.

"It's totally curved. I haven't seen curves like this since your m..."

"Shut up!" Lolegolas quickly yelled. "Dorothy Goldenhair was a saint!"

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday, Mists of Pandaria

Phat Loot Phriday: Reins of the Crimson Pandaren Phoenix

Phat Loot Phriday Reins of the Crimson Pandaren Phoenix
Lolegolas jumped at the squawking that suddenly erupted behind him. It sounded like someone strangling a moonkin. "What the heck?" the blood elf asked.

"This is my new phoenix," Throgg said, straddling an immense bird. "It's a Crimson Pandaren Phoenix."

"That doesn't look like a pandaren," Lolegolas countered. "In fact, I don't think there's anything terribly panda-like about it."

"It's just a name, little elf," the orc said. "Like hot dogs. There's nothing dog-like about hot dogs."

"Maybe it's just named that," Lolegolas said, "since, like, it's pandaren-raised or something. Still, that's a darn fine-looking mount."

"It's already killed a cyclops and a wolverine, too," Throgg said. "It was pretty amazing to watch."

Lolegolas cocked his head to the side and peered at the orc out of the corner of his eye. "Really? That's where we're going with this?"

"Well, it's supposed to be all crimson and red, but instead it's black and evil-looking. Seemed appropriate."

Lolegolas nodded. "Fair enough, then."

Item note: It's been a Challenge Mode reward, and now it seems like everyone on the beta has it. While the details of the mount could obviously change, it sure looks snazzy!

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Lucky Quilen Cub

Phat Loot Phriday Lucky Quilen Cub
Wandering through the isles of Pandaria, Throgg and Lolegolas are making a slow but inevitable trip toward Miranda. But for now, we'll enjoy some shock, awww, and general fun with their journey.

The druid jogged down the hill to catch up with the dyanamic duo. He stopped short when he saw the diminutive creature walking beside them. It looked like a pug or maybe a chihuahua, except for the rich mane around its head.

"Wait. What is that ... thing?" the worgen asked.

"Collector's Edition pet," Lolegolas said nonchalantly. "Isn't it fabulous? I love it."

"Since you disappeared, Spot, we needed a new puppy," Throgg answered. "This guy seemed apt. It's a quilen pup."

"It needs a shave," the druid said. "It's got a fierce neckbeard going on. A few more days of growth, and it'll be ready for Reddit."

"What's Reddit?" Throgg asked.

"It's a place that really loves beards," the druid answered. "I think the dwarves invented it."

Somewhere in the distance, trapped within her cage, Miranda shrieked something about a fourth wall. That was just fine, since the boy would have ignored her anyway.

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Helm of the Fire Festival

Phat Loot Phriday Helm of the Fire Festival
When last we left our heroes, Throgg and Lolegolas had just arrived in the pandaren training grounds. Throgg finally answered the question about his unique patois habits, which leads to the inevitable lunch episode.

"I'm hungry," Throgg complained. "I brought fish, though. You want fish?"

"I could go for a carp about now," Lolegolas replied. "Don't see any wood for a fire, though."

"Don't worry. I got this." Throgg opened his bag and pulled out a strange hat. It looked almost exactly like a saucepan. Without fanfare, he placed the contraption on his head and knelt to the ground. The hat burst into flame. "You can cook on my head."

"Care to repeat what you just said? 'You can cook on my head.' You realize that sounds somewhat crazy, even from you."

"It's a great invention. No more campfires -- we can just cook on each other's heads."

Lolegolas nodded in slow motion, the same way a warrior might look if a priest were trying to knife him to death. "You sure you want to try this?"

"Let's try it once and see how it pans out."

Item note: No, really, you can cook on it. We have more information about it here.

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phiday: Flippable Table

Phat Loot Phiday Flippable Table
When last we left our heroes, Throgg and Lolegolas had just crossed the barrier between worlds to join the beta. We now resume with their quest to hunt down Miranda. Not Spot has not been seen for some time.

"This doesn't look right," Lolegolas said. He stood atop a hill, looking down at small groups of pandaren practicing their martial arts. "I think we missed our target a bit. We'll have to hoof it."

"Throgg angry still," the orc companion said.

Lolegolas sighed and opened his immense bag. He took out a table and unfolded an immaculate sheet to lay atop it. He placed a mug in the center before stepping back to get a better look at his work. He stroked his chin with a thumb while he regarded the table.

"One moment," Lolegolas commented. He bent over and plucked a red wildflower from the ground before resting it in the mug. "OK. Go ahead. Flip it."

Throgg took a deep breath, grasped the edge of the table, and hurled. The table flipped end over end, crashing down on the ground below them.

"Wow," Throgg said. "You're right. I feel so much better now. As if a weight has been lifted."

"Who knows his buddy? Who knows his orcky-poo? Now that we've dispensed with that table-flipping formality, let's move on, shall we?"

Item notes: We don't know the details about the Flippable Table, but it sure does sound exciting.

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

Phat Loot Phriday: Very Manly Leggings

Image
When last we left our heroes, they began a journey to rescue Miranda. Packing their trusty Impa-- I mean, motorbike, they took off to break through the barrier between world. There are lots of spoilers here.

The crab wasn't playing fair. As the gatekeeper between worlds, the crab guarded the beach into the underworld, the dark mirror of Azeroth where all things were possible. Lolegolas was getting annoyed.

"Fine, then," the crab finally conceded. "I will let you pass through the murky depths into the underworld, where all things are tested, if you can succeed in one final challenge."

Lolegolas snorted. "We are ready! Present your test, my fine seafood."

The crab gestured with a shockingly well-manicured claw. From under the waters, a massive figure strolled toward the group. Lolegolas gasped at the size of the man. He was so muscled that even his biceps seemed to have biceps of his own.

"A wrestling match," the crab quipped. "It's a lot like being on the forums."

"Dunno if I can win this," Throgg said. "I'm not really feeling anger right now so much as ... vague disapproval."

"We'll just have to get you angry," the blood elf said.

"Not sure we can do that," the orc replied. "I'm mostly worried about Miranda."

"Firefly was cancelled to make room for Glen Beck!"

Throgg snarled a bit.

Read more →

Filed under: Phat Loot Phriday

WoW Insider Show 

Subscribe via  iTunes for our latest show.

Hot Topics


 

Upcoming Events


Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth

Featured Galleries

It came from the Blog: Pandamonium
The gaming artwork of Jessica Dinh
Mists of Pandaria Raid DPS Analysis
Mists of Pandaria Collector's Edition
Death Knight plague epidemic
Mega Bloks: Goblin Zeppelin Ambush
Mists of Pandaria Beta: Ruins beneath Scarlet Halls
Mists of Pandaria: New warlock pets
Female Pandaren Customization

 

Categories