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  • Solanum
  • Member Since May 19th, 2009

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Recent Comments:

Drama Mamas: How many chances should misbehaving guild members get? {WoW}

Mar 11th 2011 9:45AM The GM should have backed his officers, but he didn't. However, I find that understandable. We're human. We're not military strategists. Sometimes something tugs at your heart and you go "I just can't."

I'd be interested to see if the behavior stops now that the member doesn't have so much on her shoulders.

I wouldn't be so fast to call her unable to "control her drama." In some ways, yes, of course, but we're also talking about a child with a level of stress in her life that you or I will probably never know. When we're talking about drama, to me, that's automatically a pretty dismissive term. Drama, to me, is OH MY GOD, SHE'S WEARING THE SAME SHOES THAT I AM. This girl has what I'd refer to as Real Problems.

She has been operating under a level of pressure for a year or more that is absolutely extraordinary. And frightening for anyone, let alone a teenager.

I'd challenge any one of us to live a year feeling constant fear, dread, shame, desperation, and guilt and see how we start acting. LGBT kids aren't killing themselves in large numbers for the lulz. They have very real problems that take a huge personal toll.

Drama Mamas: Divorce drama {WoW}

May 30th 2010 4:35PM I feel the need to mention that very few of us choose partners by visiting The Douchebag Store and going "I'd like one with a guitar, please."

These behaviors very often don't come out in full force until after you've got some other serious things going on (like a home or a marriage).

Drama Mamas: Divorce drama {WoW}

May 29th 2010 10:10AM Uhm.

The dissolution of marriage is one of the most harrowing things a person can go through in life and the fact that they aren't dealing with it well is, huh, normal. The desire to isolate oneself as far away from the source of your pain isn't uncommon, nor is it wrong.

This is a very real emotional wound you're talking about. A divorce is not LOLOOPS. This is not a man freaking out and dissolving his guild over a loot roll. You did this, not him. I bet you dollars that in a few months, the tirades would be over and life would have gone as normal had you not taken the actions you took.

I'd also like to mention that you inviting her to the guild was the single most boneheaded and possibly heartless thing I've heard all day. Even when divorces are amicable, which this one clearly wasn't, generally people don't want to spend a ton of time with the person who just did a tapdance all over their emotional well being, no matter who was right. You, and I have no idea why you thought this would be a good idea, invited her into his space AFTER the relationship had gone sour and then opted to doggedly protect her right to be there.

I can't even begin to fathom what you were thinking or not thinking and the fact that he only called you an idiot is a testament to his self control. Like, I'm seriously thinking this a troll because no one could possibly be that dumb as to invite the unwelcome ex-wife of the GM into a guild and wonder why the guy got honked off about it.

Breakfast Topic: Fear ... so exhilarating {WoW}

May 29th 2010 9:24AM Back when we were noobs, I was a Forsaken warrior and my boyfriend at the time was a blood elf pally. We wanted to go to SFK. We did not know about the orb.


He corpse dragged. Across both plaguelands.

I never saw him go there again.

Breakfast Topic: Fear ... so exhilarating {WoW}

May 29th 2010 9:15AM My reaction to the fel reaver is one of quiet resignation.

WOOOOONK. *screen shake*

Deep sigh.

Cataclysm: Must find dungeons before they appear in the Dungeon Finder, attunements possible {WoW}

May 3rd 2010 1:57PM I was wondering how they were going to make people actually do the quests for the expansion.

I recently started leveling a pally and she has never left Silvermoon. She's level 50. I started wondering if my main was going to never leave the Undercity.

The attunement process isn't horrible, but having it tied to rep was a pain in BC. I'd prefer a quest or a line of quests.

And I prefer attunement was somehow BoA. I'm a pinch healer and it was painful to not be able to get into where I needed in BC.

Drama Mamas: Invasion of privacy {WoW}

Apr 17th 2010 2:13PM @op and robin

Spot on.

Robin, while it's noble and honorable to approach the couple with "color blindness" as it were, the ability to do that is a hallmark of straight privilege. In fact, while I'm glad no one else views them as a "gay" couple, I bet they spend most days of their lives dealing continuously with the fact that they are a gay couple.

I would suggest googling a bit about a color blind racism to see how "I don't see color/I don't see sexuality" actually functions.

@ Lisa The nature of their relationship isn't quite irrelevant. If it were a man and a woman, you could probably bet that any fear of them being outed as a straight couple wouldn't include threats/insults based entirely on their sexual orientation. No one will straight bash them. No one will try to save them from being in love with who they are in love with. That happens to gay couples. It happens a LOT. It is an entirely relevant and realistic issue that they have to deal with. You cannot treat a gay relationship like it's nothing but a straight relationship with two boys in it because it is not.

Spot on with not outing them, though. Outing is a personal decision. Being outed by someone else is a horrible, horrible feeling.

Win a pony from {WoW}

Apr 16th 2010 5:03AM Comment

Drama Mamas: Overpulling your love life {WoW}

Mar 28th 2010 4:34PM I love this post and I hope the Warrior is still reading, because I want to throw something out there that I've been wrestling with myself.

"She is beautiful, charming, funny, intelligent and never bugs, scolds or annoys me."

Of course she doesn't. You have a pretend relationship. You are completely and utterly free of outside stressors. You owe her nothing and she owes you nothing. The entirety of your relationship involves make moon eyes at each other while you hang out. There's no rent, no kids, no school, no jobs...nothing to distract from the relationship.

Relationships get stressful when they become real, and even the best of us will want to zot our partners and start again. It's natural.

But you're comparing a relationship that takes work to a relationship that doesn't take work. Guess what? If you take the secondary relationship to a long-term, RL level...she's going to bug, scold and annoy you sometimes.

Know Your Lore: The Red Dragonflight, Page 3 {WoW}

Feb 24th 2010 3:45AM I wonder that myself.

We are, admittedly, pretty beastly. 25 of us could do more than go cow-tipping.

Still, I haven't seen any of my mages, you know, blow entire continents to bits.

No matter what they do to us in terms of making us even more beastly...we look like appetizers to him.