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Posts with tag AroundAzeroth

Around Azeroth: Midnight blue

"File this under our guild motto, "Hold my drink and watch this," writes submitter Gimmlette. "Spectacular Death on Llane (US-A) ran Siege of Orgrimmar, first wing, to give a few boosted 90's the chance to get gear. After Norushen, one of the tanks, BigBearButt, suggested he run into the next room and use his battle horn. What could possibly go wrong with this idea? Or, as Peter Venkman says, 'I love this plan! I'm excited to be a part of it!' We only wiped out half of the raid the first time. A couple more blasts and we had 98% of the room. There were a couple that stubbornly resisted the call. Rounding them all up created a really cool pattern, almost like Picasso's blue period."

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth: Too cool for Westfall

Are giant, square '80s sunglasses the new Azerothian trend? I hope not. Some things don't ever need to be revived. "With the new model updates, I noticed the mercenaries by Mortwake's Tower are looking just too dang cool for their own good," writes submitter Revy of Moon Guard (US-?). "Only they would be able to pull off a look this good."

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth: First in, last out

We get more of these every expansion. Submitter Mementh of Earthen Ring (US-H) wanted to be the first one to welcome the Iron Horde to Azeroth, so she camped out at the Dark Portal Monday night, just waiting for the green mist to turn into red. Instead of greeting her in a civilized fashion, they chose to run her through with spears for being part of the traitorous, fake Horde. And she'd cooked them a nice dinner and everything!

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth: I read it in the daily mail

"Everyone knows about the poor mail service in Azeroth, what with wages and benefits being reduced and mail carriers on a work-to-rule campaign," writes today's submitter. "Sestertaa, my faithful banking alt on Thunderlord (US-A), therefore didn't have high expectations the other day that her anticipated package had arrived. Much to her surprise, however, some poor sap was in a much worse state from the long wait for his mail to be delivered. Sestertaa is now seriously considering using AAMS (Anytime Anywhere Messenger Service) next time she sends that special package."

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth, Beta Edition: Animal attraction

What do wild animals think when they see a druid in feral form? Do they consider it an outsider, or do they welcome it into the fold? Beta tester Skamp of Thunder Cats on Borean Tundra (US-A) seems to have drawn the attention of this weird toucan-like bird, but so far it's holding off on attacking him. Good thing, too, because that sword-beak looks like it can do some serious damage.

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth, Beta Edition: A woman of mystery

Who is that orc? She's so mysterious! Well, she's standing atop a bed of flowers using a branch with berries as a sword and a flower as a shield, which is actually pretty mysterious behavior for anyone who isn't a six-year-old girl or a drunk cosplayer. Still, if you have to title yourself Mysterious Orc, you might be trying a little too hard. (Thanks to beta tester Nganga of Pact of War on Silver Hand [US-H] for the screenshot!)

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Around Azeroth: No room at the inn

"Thanks to the weakening of the boundaries between alternate realities (CRZ), this is just your average day in Goldshire's Lion's Pride Inn," writes submitter Enishi of Darkwind on Wyrmrest Accord (US-A). "Alliance, Horde, debauchery, it's all here. Those unfamiliar with this Moon Guard reality take heed; there have been troubling reports about people who've spent too much time there. It changes everything about them -- acting different, dressing different, growing mustaches. They collect robes, lotions, new bedspreads, curtains, have tastes for thick carpeting and weirdo lighting, and they often get new friends to match their new tastes. If you're not into that, keep your head down, get in, do your quests, get out, and leave town without reading chat."



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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth: Next season on Game of Thrones!

Let me tell you a story, adventurer. This is the tale of an age long past, when the pandaren were forced to worship the larger, levitating pandaren. Someone was carrying around a red ball. There was also the ghost of a dead saurok, and a statue of a dragon, I guess. And ... all the larger pandaren were doing the YMCA dance? None of this makes any sense! Assistant Lorewalker Martin! This story is incredibly long and confusing. When will you have the next tale prepared? Six years, you say? Adventurer, do you still have that blackjack you used on those Lazy Peons so many years ago? I have a new quest for you. (Thanks to Qaeto of Trollbane [US-A] for the screenshot!)

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Around Azeroth: Your creepy uncle

The standards for child adoption in Azeroth are still disturbingly low, I see. Submitter Randomlock of Randomnoobs and Friends on Tichondrius (US-H) somehow managed to obtain guardianship of this Argent Gruntling, which he thoughtfully named I Farm Gold. Rather than put I Farm Gold in any sort of school or apprenticeship, Randomlock has decided that the best education is for the child to sit in front of the auction house while he shows off his own unique transmog set, consisting of a horned helmet, a legendary cape, and a loincloth. Appropriate!

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth: Cute. Clever. Mischievous. Intelligent. Dangerous.

"Many guilds request that potential members fill out an application, as it's a good way to see if a new member will fit in," writes submitter Gimmlette. "Spectacular Death of Llane (US-A) also asks some follow-up questions, such as 'What should you never do to a Mogwai?' If you remember, you should never expose it to bright light or feed it after midnight. Lastly, you should never get it wet. Kelidor demonstrates why getting a worgen wet and then applying electricity, particularly from a gnomish transport device at Steelgrill's Depot, might not be a good idea either. Back away slowly."

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth: Ain't no party like a Kor'kron party

Because a Kor'kron party is mandatory. Submitter Karhog and his orc and goblin only guild Korkron Vanguard on Argent Dawn (EU-H), who missed a perfect opportunity to name themselves "It's Not Easy Being Green", held an impromptu rave in one of the Orgrimmar elevators. No stimulants were used, in accordance with Garrosh's "drug-free workplace or I chop your head off" policy, but everyone still ended up shirtless and sweaty. Ugh, sweaty orcs must smell just terrible.

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Around Azeroth: Waste not, want not

Such a shame to waste that much food! Don't you know there are children starving in Pandaria? Well, not the pandaren children, who are actually pretty chubby. That infinitely replenishing farm in Halfhill has gotten kind of old, so now everyone's buying prepackaged, fattening stuff from the vendors. But the, uh, the mogu children are starving! They could be eating those feasts that someone so carelessly tossed around Stormwind, but I guess it's more important for a guild to get the Dinner Party achievement. Now the mogu children will have to eat the pandaren children. (Thanks to submitter Zaguate of JupponGatana on Steamwheedle Cartel [US-A] for the screenshot!)

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth: The belly of the beast

The announcement of Warlords of Draenor has sent a bolt of nostalgia coursing through my heart. So when I saw this picture of Vazula of Moon Ascendant on Hyjal (US-H) standing just inside the entrance to Onyxia's Lair, I thought it was a screenshot from back in the day. It reminded me of my own female troll, standing there in mismatched fire resist gear for my first-ever 40-man raid. The presence of Savage is the only anachronism that spoils the effect. Replace him with an Echeyakee and we'll be in business!

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth: Caput draconis

Submitter Ysabéll of The Evil Dead on Malygos (US-A) writes, "After providing the denizens of Goldshire, Northshire and all the forests and roads in between with the most impressive Mammoth Train ever, several of our group decided that the presence of the Darkmoon Faire warranted not one, but two (!) mount parties. Bronze Drakes ensued." Ah, the Bronze Drake. The lazy man's dragon mount.

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

Around Azeroth: From one, many

Submitter Xixillia of Barbed Velvet on Magtheridon (US-H) must be blessed with an infinite supply of patience (or Adderall.) She spawn-camped around the clock for two weeks so her team of four multi-boxing hunters could all get their spirit kitty. Of course, I had to ask her whether she was another incarnation of the infamous Xzin, who used to make my Alterac Valleys much more entertaining back when I was on Magtheridon. Sadly, she is not, but it still triggered a wave of nostalgia for my old server. Funky! Krague! Rohnaj! Even Sarkasmos! How I miss you all.

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Filed under: Around Azeroth

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