Each week, Daniel Howell contributes BigRedKitty, a column with strategies, tips and tricks for the hunter class sprinkled with a healthy dose of completely improper, sometimes libelous, personal commentary.
Editor's note: We think Damh and Hobbes are trying to be funny. Rogues really don't need to be worried about what happens when they log in tonight. At least we're pretty sure they don't.
10. Rogues haven't just been nerfed, they've been completely eliminated from the game. Pfft. Gone. All Alliance Rogues are now Shaman, all Horde Rogues are now Paladins. Same gear though, so you'd better get to the Auction House quick.
9. Paladins can no longer pull. They can still tank but if they are in a party of two or more, they cannot attack a mob than has an empty threat list. The Blizzard programmers stated in the patch notes, "Until they learn how to pull without getting so much aggro that a hunter cannot peel off a mob to trap, we're not gonna change this."
8. Holy Priests, Holy Paladins and Resto Druids now get a monthly gold allowance sent in the mail. For every hour they play they get 5 gold tribute. "You'd pay them yourself if you could get a Shadow Lab run more than once per week, wouldn't you?" said Nikoli Bransdorf, instance programming intern and Beastmaster hunter.
7. New profession: Sheriff. Start out by putting the beggars in the pokie, move on to finding the level-one gold spammers and putting them in chains, and at 375 you will be able to fix bugged instances and quests with your Ancient Baton of Compliance.
6. The fishing arsenal has been upgraded to include spears, harpoons and an epic Engineering item, the Goblin Infisherator XL. Chunk this daddy into the ocean and a mild seismic explosion tosses enough marine life onto the beach that every Naga in Stranglethorn Vale will call you Master.
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Filed under: Patches, Blizzard, Humor, (Hunter) Big Red Kitty